Not Praying for the Redskins Tomorrow
I would like to state for the record that I will not be praying for the Redskins to win tomorrow. Therefore, if the Redskins lose, which they will, it will be y'alls fault because you don't believe in G-d and you didn't pray for them to win.
"Obviously I'm convinced of the existence of G-d. I'm equally convinced that Atheists who've led good lives will be in Olam HaBa going "How the heck did I wind up in this place?!?" while Christians who've treated people like dirt will be in some other place asking the exact same question."