Lets have some fun, believers welcome, fave comedy movie lines.

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Lets have some fun, believers welcome, fave comedy movie lines.

I take the debate of all god claims seriously. But we can discuss other things too and find some common ground even if we think the other is full of shit for believing or not believing. I'll start.

Lets work it like this. State a comedy line or comedy lines and someone else will guess the movie/s. Then they post a line and someone else guesses the movie. So on and so on. Winner gets a free supply of pocket lint.

Line:
 

1. "It's nice and cozy if you like Hannibal Lector"

 

2. "In the Virgina Slims tennis Tournament I always root against the heterosexual"

 

3. "You will cream in your jeans when you see Catholic High School Girls In Trouble"

 

4. "Cigarette?...........Yes I know"

 

5. "Do you like movies about gladiators?"

 

6. "Ive been out combing the high schools all day"

 

7. "I cant find any answers in this book"

 

8. "10-9-8-7-5......What happened to 6? Just kidding"

Now your turn. If you want to quote other lines from these same movies, go for it.

 

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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Eloise wrote: I recognise

Eloise wrote:

 

I recognise this. Is it Death Becomes Her. ?

Ding ding ding ding ding

If, if a white man puts his arm around me voluntarily, that's brotherhood. But if you - if you hold a gun on him and make him embrace me and pretend to be friendly or brotherly toward me, then that's not brotherhood, that's hypocrisy.- Malcolm X


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Eloise wrote: ARRGH!!!!

Eloise wrote:

 

ARRGH!!!! LOVE this one! Grosse Pointe Blank.

Me too! Also High Fidelity.

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 "I've just pissed in my

 "I've just pissed in my pants and nobody can do anything about it." 

 

If, if a white man puts his arm around me voluntarily, that's brotherhood. But if you - if you hold a gun on him and make him embrace me and pretend to be friendly or brotherly toward me, then that's not brotherhood, that's hypocrisy.- Malcolm X


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Brian37 wrote:And, "You want

Brian37 wrote:

And, "You want someone out of your house. I want someone out of your house"

Animal house?

If, if a white man puts his arm around me voluntarily, that's brotherhood. But if you - if you hold a gun on him and make him embrace me and pretend to be friendly or brotherly toward me, then that's not brotherhood, that's hypocrisy.- Malcolm X


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Brian37 wrote: Beyond Saving

Brian37 wrote:

Beyond Saving wrote:

DOH! 6 is Revenge of the Nerds, (chatted a friend on my poker table, is that legal?)

To quote the soup Nazi, "NO LINT FOR YOU"

I also like from that movie,

"I have frush..........What the fuck is a frush?"

"Maybe we could have crab regs and wrobster craws?........What the fuck are robster craws?"

 

Want some trivia?  I was in that movie.  And I never saw it.

Where was some of it filmed, and which scene I was in?

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

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cj wrote:Brian37 wrote:

cj wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

Beyond Saving wrote:

DOH! 6 is Revenge of the Nerds, (chatted a friend on my poker table, is that legal?)

To quote the soup Nazi, "NO LINT FOR YOU"

I also like from that movie,

"I have frush..........What the fuck is a frush?"

"Maybe we could have crab regs and wrobster craws?........What the fuck are robster craws?"

 

Want some trivia?  I was in that movie.  And I never saw it.

Where was some of it filmed, and which scene I was in?

 

Hell yea, wow, that is soo cool.

 

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Beyond Saving wrote:Brian37

Beyond Saving wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

And, "You want someone out of your house. I want someone out of your house"

Animal house?

Go back and read the post where I was responding to someone. They had already named the movie. I was also quoting other lines from that same movie. And no, it was not Animal House. Here is a line from Animal House,

"WAS IT OVER WHEN THE GERMANS BOMBED PEAL HARBOR!"

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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cj wrote:Want some trivia? 

cj wrote:

Want some trivia?  I was in that movie.  And I never saw it.

Where was some of it filmed, and which scene I was in?

You're part of movie history ? I'm guessing the schmaltzy speech scene near the end.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWH1jEgiO0w

Did you get paid ?


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Beyond Saving wrote: "I've

Beyond Saving wrote:

 "I've just pissed in my pants and nobody can do anything about it." 

Dances with wolves, lol.

 

I'll add some more quotes to the one nobody got yet :

"I like to kill, I like to maim, cuz I'm insane, but it's okay cuz I can change !"

"When Canada is dead and gone, there'll be no more Celine Dion"

 

Edit: Brian, is 7 the Simpson's Movie ?


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Anonymouse wrote:Beyond

Anonymouse wrote:

Beyond Saving wrote:

 "I've just pissed in my pants and nobody can do anything about it." 

Dances with wolves, lol.

 

I'll add some more quotes to the one nobody got yet :

"I like to kill, I like to maim, cuz I'm insane, but it's okay cuz I can change !"

"When Canada is dead and gone, there'll be no more Celine Dion"

 

Edit: Brian, is 7 the Simpson's Movie ?

Yes 7 was when Homer's Grandfather was flopping around in the church isle and Marge said "Homer do something"

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Apparently I did this wrong

Apparently I did this wrong last night. Basically all I read was fave comedy mocie quotes lol. Not real great at asking trivia questions but here goes. One of my fave movies with some comedy, the song " stuck in the middle with you " ( steve miller band ) during a brutal scene. Tarantino fans should know thhis one.

If all the Christians who have called other Christians " not really a Christian " were to vanish, there'd be no Christians left.


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South Park Bigger Longer Uncut

 

 

"I like to kill, I like to maim, cuz I'm insane, but it's okay cuz I can change !"

"When Canada is dead and gone, there'll be no more Celine Dion"

South Park Bigger Longer and Uncut, love that one!

 

These aren't from a comedy but it's my fave movie nonetheless,

 

Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is

Greed is for amateurs. Disorder, chaos, anarchy, now that's fun!

Great. A guy shows up looking like a mime from hell and you lose him right out in the open. Well, at least he didn't do that walking against the wind shit, I hate that.

And I say, I'm dead, and I move.

 

All that I know, there was no god for me - Fear Factory - Resurrection
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Kevin Wilslef wrote:Abashed

Kevin Wilslef wrote:


Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is

Greed is for amateurs. Disorder, chaos, anarchy, now that's fun!

Great. A guy shows up looking like a mime from hell and you lose him right out in the open. Well, at least he didn't do that walking against the wind shit, I hate that.

And I say, I'm dead, and I move.

 

The Crow, I'm pretty sure.

Someone's doing a short movie based on another one of James O'Barr's comics : http://www.scificool.com/frame-137-short-film-short-stuff-kicking-ass-in-post-apocalyptic-action/

 

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rebecca.williamson

rebecca.williamson wrote:
Apparently I did this wrong last night. Basically all I read was fave comedy mocie quotes lol. Not real great at asking trivia questions but here goes. One of my fave movies with some comedy, the song " stuck in the middle with you " ( steve miller band ) during a brutal scene. Tarantino fans should know thhis one.

Reservoir dogs.

I love Stephen Wright as the DJ in that one.

 

"Killing is wrong. there should be another word for killing, like bad-wrong or badong. yes, killing is badong."


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I watch too many movies.

Anonymouse wrote:

Kevin Wilslef wrote:

 

Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is

Greed is for amateurs. Disorder, chaos, anarchy, now that's fun!

Great. A guy shows up looking like a mime from hell and you lose him right out in the open. Well, at least he didn't do that walking against the wind shit, I hate that.

And I say, I'm dead, and I move.

 

The Crow, I'm pretty sure.

Someone's doing a short movie based on another one of James O'Barr's comics : http://www.scificool.com/frame-137-short-film-short-stuff-kicking-ass-in-post-apocalyptic-action/

 That looks cool, gonna have to give that a watch when I get a chance.

"I speak Spanish to God, French to women, English to men, and Japanese to my horse."

The Adventure of Buckaroo Banzai across the 8th Dimension. Something I hadn't seen in awhile, surprised I remembered it.

 

 

Boy, the next word that comes out of your mouth better be some brilliant fuckin' Mark Twain shit. 'Cause it's definitely getting chiseled on your tombstone.

Did you hear what he called me, Boss? I ain't no chicken fucker!

Where the hell you goin'? Damn it. Don't you NEVER turn your back on a fuckin' clown when he's talkin' to you!

 

All that I know, there was no god for me - Fear Factory - Resurrection
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pauljohntheskeptic

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More help for this one.

I figured that AIG would get it right away. 

 

"Anybody who tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fucking have any."

 

I got boiler room but the thread was about comedy still at that point.

 

Try this one:

 

"Willy told me he wanted his knob polished."

 

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Movie 1:"This top line

Movie 1:

"This top line translates roughly into, 'Pharaoh gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, 'Cleopatra does the nasty.'"

"Say what?"

"That's the best I can translate it."

 

Movie 2:

"From now on, the only person who gets to yell is me. Why? Because I have a gun. People with guns get to do whatever they want. Married people without guns - for instance, you - DO NOT get to yell. Why? NO GUNS! No guns, no yelling. See? Simple little equation."

 

Movie 3:

"One little murder and I'm Jack the Ripper."

 

And a gimme, move 4:

"Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key."

 

"Yes, I seriously believe that consciousness is a product of a natural process. I find that the neuroscientists, psychologists, and philosophers who proceed from that premise are the ones who are actually making useful contributions to our understanding of the mind." - PZ Myers


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"Look, Bendix made a stew. I

"Look, Bendix made a stew. I had no idea there was a foot in it. You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world!"

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Doesn't anyone remember

Doesn't anyone remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

Am I the only one?

The spoof of "A Fist Full of Dollars" was in the movie "A Fist Full of Yen"

"You will have the chance to kill 50 or 60 men"

Or when the bad guy was torturing everyone and they resisted but he got to the last guy

"TAKE HIM TO DETROIT..........NO NO NO NOT DETROIT"

What is funny about that last line is that one of the "Scary Movie" sequels also made fun of the city of Detroit 30 plus years later.

When the black reporter took her white friend into the editing van

"This is a clip of Detroit before the alien invasion"(city on fire and in total ruins)

"This is a clip of Detroit after the invasion" (the only difference was the alien ships shooting lazers)

 

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nigelTheBold wrote:Movie

nigelTheBold wrote:

Movie 1:

"This top line translates roughly into, 'Pharaoh gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, 'Cleopatra does the nasty.'"

"Say what?"

"That's the best I can translate it."

 

Movie 2:

"From now on, the only person who gets to yell is me. Why? Because I have a gun. People with guns get to do whatever they want. Married people without guns - for instance, you - DO NOT get to yell. Why? NO GUNS! No guns, no yelling. See? Simple little equation."

 

Movie 3:

"One little murder and I'm Jack the Ripper."

 

And a gimme, move 4:

"Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key."

 

No 4 either Caddy Shack or the golfing movie with Adam Sandler(sp).

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Anonymouse wrote:cj

Anonymouse wrote:

cj wrote:

Want some trivia?  I was in that movie.  And I never saw it.

Where was some of it filmed, and which scene I was in?

You're part of movie history ? I'm guessing the schmaltzy speech scene near the end.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWH1jEgiO0w

Did you get paid ?

 

Yes, and yes.  Though I thought it wasn't near enough for staying up to 3am on what was a pretty chilly night.  And they made us take off our coats.  No, you can't see me or my friend.  Do you know where it was filmed?

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

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Brian37 wrote:nigelTheBold

Brian37 wrote:

nigelTheBold wrote:

And a gimme, move 4:

"Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key." 

No 4 either Caddy Shack or the golfing movie with Adam Sandler(sp).

 

Yep. Caddy Shack. A movie that has some fantastic comedic moments, and some not-so-fantastic comedic moments. Overall, a very funny movie when you're 14.

"Yes, I seriously believe that consciousness is a product of a natural process. I find that the neuroscientists, psychologists, and philosophers who proceed from that premise are the ones who are actually making useful contributions to our understanding of the mind." - PZ Myers


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Brian37 wrote:Doesn't anyone

Brian37 wrote:

Doesn't anyone remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

Am I the only one?

I have KFM on DVD, but I haven't seen it in years. As in, over a decade. That is one of my favorite sketch comedy movies ever.

I am ashamed I did not get your clues.

"Yes, I seriously believe that consciousness is a product of a natural process. I find that the neuroscientists, psychologists, and philosophers who proceed from that premise are the ones who are actually making useful contributions to our understanding of the mind." - PZ Myers


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I would be remiss for not

I would be remiss for not mentioning this,

In what movie did two men end up at the "Blue Oyster Club"

 

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Brian37 wrote:I would be

Brian37 wrote:

I would be remiss for not mentioning this,

In what movie did two men end up at the "Blue Oyster Club"

 

 

Weren't there ten of those movies?  With the same joke in every one?

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cj wrote:Yes, and yes. 

cj wrote:

Yes, and yes.  Though I thought it wasn't near enough for staying up to 3am on what was a pretty chilly night.  And they made us take off our coats.  No, you can't see me or my friend.  Do you know where it was filmed?

Most of america looks the same to me. Arizona university ? I'm hoping for some insider trivia.

How many takes, btw ?


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nigelTheBold wrote:Movie

nigelTheBold wrote:

Movie 1:

"This top line translates roughly into, 'Pharaoh gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, 'Cleopatra does the nasty.'"

"Say what?"

"That's the best I can translate it."

My favorite Elvis movie, Bubahotep.


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Anonymouse

Anonymouse wrote:

nigelTheBold wrote:

Movie 1:

"This top line translates roughly into, 'Pharaoh gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, 'Cleopatra does the nasty.'"

"Say what?"

"That's the best I can translate it."

My favorite Elvis movie, Bubahotep.

It's not only my favorite Elvis movie, it's also my favorite mummy movie, and one of the most under-rated horror-comedy movies ever made. A mummy walking around in a stetson and cowboy boots, fighting Elvis and JFK in a retirement home? Bloody brilliant!

I was hoping someone would get that.

"Yes, I seriously believe that consciousness is a product of a natural process. I find that the neuroscientists, psychologists, and philosophers who proceed from that premise are the ones who are actually making useful contributions to our understanding of the mind." - PZ Myers


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Anonymouse wrote:cj

Anonymouse wrote:

cj wrote:

Yes, and yes.  Though I thought it wasn't near enough for staying up to 3am on what was a pretty chilly night.  And they made us take off our coats.  No, you can't see me or my friend.  Do you know where it was filmed?

Most of america looks the same to me. Arizona university ? I'm hoping for some insider trivia.

How many takes, btw ?

 

University of Arizona, Tucson.  You can't tell from the movie - they blurred the background.  It was filmed in front of "Old Main", the very first building at the university.  Can't tell that either.  Those things that might be palm trees in some of the shots?  They really are palm trees.

Let's see - it was late winter.  And southern Arizona can get cold in the winter.  Not as cold as Canada, but at or below freezing.  That night was one of the darn near freezing nights.  There is a large auditorium - seats 1000, used for performances and big classes - nearby.  That is where we went between shots.  Put our coats back on and warmed up some.  We were paid Screen Actor's Guild wages for extras.  None of us belonged to the union, but it wasn't much money.

There was some sort of carnival going on - Spring Fling, I think it was called.  Though I may be confusing it with some other event elsewhere.  I never went.  The frat boys (fraternity members) would take their scats (sorority cats) for a cheap date.  I belonged to one of the honorary fraternities - not that I am a guy, nor that I particularly cared.  It was for - hopefully - a little extra something on the resume.  As a divorced mom with three children, we didn't have a dime to spare and the boys would have wanted to go and ride the rides as well.

The deal was supposed to be a fraternity member was picked to be in the movie with the handsome jock.  And they did shoot some scenes with this guy.  But in the movie, almost all his scenes were cut.  A lot of people - those not in the movie as well - were disappointed that you couldn't recognize the campus.

Number of takes?  I don't remember.  By 3 am I was half asleep.  It seemed we went out and did the same thing over and over, waiting for lights to be adjusted between takes.  No one offered us coffee or hot drinks.  We used the rest rooms in the auditorium and drank cold water from the fountains.  The seats were too uncomfortable to to take a nap.  I was wearing a really dorky purple hat - thinking you might be able to see the hat - but I think they deliberately avoided getting it in the camera.

Old Main 1902

Originally

 

Old Main - now

 

You can kind of see the lawns around the building.  We were far enough away, they were able to block out the building in the film.

 

 

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

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"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


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nigelTheBold wrote: Movie

nigelTheBold wrote:

 

Movie 3:

"One little murder and I'm Jack the Ripper."

 

 

I think this is Throw Momma from the Train.

 

"Why is New Jersey called "The Garden State"?

"Because "Oil and Petrochemical Refinery State" wouldn't fit on a license plate?"

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nigelTheBold wrote:Brian37

nigelTheBold wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

Doesn't anyone remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

Am I the only one?

I have KFM on DVD, but I haven't seen it in years. As in, over a decade. That is one of my favorite sketch comedy movies ever.

I am ashamed I did not get your clues.

I don't want to talk to you any more. You are a Stalin, Hitler loving Commie Pinko. Go take that cum stained poster of Ned Flaunders off your wall and shove it up your ass. You are dead to me. KFM is the father of slap stick movies. That's like not knowing who Dawkins is or Thomas Jefferson are.

You have to be the most ignorant comedy needless irrelevant trivia fan I have ever run into.

There would be no Space Balls or Scary Movie if it were not for KFM.

And all this time, I thought you were my friend. You think you know someone.

(EDIT:Disclaimer, emotocons have been omitted due to obvious sarcasm. That and my mom fed me lead paint chips in place of Frosted Flakes)

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Brian37 wrote:nigelTheBold

Brian37 wrote:

nigelTheBold wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

Doesn't anyone remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

Am I the only one?

I have KFM on DVD, but I haven't seen it in years. As in, over a decade. That is one of my favorite sketch comedy movies ever.

I am ashamed I did not get your clues.

I don't want to talk to you any more. You are a Stalin, Hitler loving Commie Pinko. Go take that cum stained poster of Ned Flaunders off your wall and shove it up your ass. You are dead to me. KFM is the father of slap stick movies. That's like not knowing who Dawkins is or Thomas Jefferson are.

You have to be the most ignorant comedy needless irrelevant trivia fan I have ever run into.

There would be no Space Balls or Scary Movie if it were not for KFM.

And all this time, I thought you were my friend. You think you know someone.

(EDIT:Disclaimer, emotocons have been omitted due to obvious sarcasm. That and my mom fed me lead paint chips in place of Frosted Flakes)

No emoticons needed. I'm laughing my motherfucking ass off.

I will try to earn your forgiveness. I really will.

"Yes, I seriously believe that consciousness is a product of a natural process. I find that the neuroscientists, psychologists, and philosophers who proceed from that premise are the ones who are actually making useful contributions to our understanding of the mind." - PZ Myers


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nigelTheBold wrote:Brian37

nigelTheBold wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

nigelTheBold wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

Doesn't anyone remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

Am I the only one?

I have KFM on DVD, but I haven't seen it in years. As in, over a decade. That is one of my favorite sketch comedy movies ever.

I am ashamed I did not get your clues.

I don't want to talk to you any more. You are a Stalin, Hitler loving Commie Pinko. Go take that cum stained poster of Ned Flaunders off your wall and shove it up your ass. You are dead to me. KFM is the father of slap stick movies. That's like not knowing who Dawkins is or Thomas Jefferson are.

You have to be the most ignorant comedy needless irrelevant trivia fan I have ever run into.

There would be no Space Balls or Scary Movie if it were not for KFM.

And all this time, I thought you were my friend. You think you know someone.

(EDIT:Disclaimer, emotocons have been omitted due to obvious sarcasm. That and my mom fed me lead paint chips in place of Frosted Flakes)

No emoticons needed. I'm laughing my motherfucking ass off.

I will try to earn your forgiveness. I really will.

Ok, fine. You want my forgiveness?

Lets talk TV THEN.

Name me the TV show where this exchange came from.

"THAT MAN BELONGS IN A POUND!"

"Of what?"

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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Brian37 wrote:"My daddy says

Brian37 wrote:

"My daddy says I french kiss the best" THEY ALWAYS EDIT THAT LINE OUT ON TV!

I can't believe no one got this.

National Lampoon's Vacation, when the Grizwald's(sp) visited their inbred family members. The daughter of the inlaws was on the swings talking  with the daughter of Chevy Chase.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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cj wrote:Number of takes? 

cj wrote:
Number of takes?  I don't remember.  By 3 am I was half asleep.  It seemed we went out and did the same thing over and over, waiting for lights to be adjusted between takes.  No one offered us coffee or hot drinks.  We used the rest rooms in the auditorium and drank cold water from the fountains.  The seats were too uncomfortable to to take a nap.  I was wearing a really dorky purple hat - thinking you might be able to see the hat - but I think they deliberately avoided getting it in the camera.

I think I get now why you never went to see it.

Not sure why they bothered filming there only to block out the building. Movie people are weird.


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pauljohntheskeptic

pauljohntheskeptic wrote:

 "Why is New Jersey called "The Garden State"?

"Because "Oil and Petrochemical Refinery State" wouldn't fit on a license plate?"

That Sandra Bullock movie....Miss...something.

 

Okay, an easy one : "Death by stereo !"


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Anonymouse

Anonymouse wrote:

pauljohntheskeptic wrote:

 "Why is New Jersey called "The Garden State"?

"Because "Oil and Petrochemical Refinery State" wouldn't fit on a license plate?"

That Sandra Bullock movie....Miss...something.

 

Okay, an easy one : "Death by stereo !"

If it is the one I am thinking of

It also has:

"Pig Vomit"

and

"Kill kill kill, kill the white man"

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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If people are running out of

If people are running out of ideas for movies lines, lets extend this beyond movies to any movie or tv show or outright funny line you have heard anywhere.

Last week on Cobert they made fun of the National x-mass tree being cut down and being tracked on twitter for it's trip to DC

Tree tweeting, "Day 2. They've chained me to a flatbed. Sap everywhere, tell my pine cones I love them".

 

#2 My favorite line from Night Court was from Bull when the court staff was trapped in the basement of the courthouse because of a fire.

Bull smiles and says, "Death is just nature's way of saying you're not alive anymore".

And in one of my earlier posts:

"THAT MAN BELONGS IN A POUND"

Response "Of what?"

That is from Moonlighting, with Bruce Willace(sp). When Maddie was pissed at David and stormed into the office and slammed the door shut and Ms Depesto responded "Of what?".

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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1.  The White House wants

1.  The White House wants to know is everything ok with the alien space craft from Planet 10 or should we just go ahead and destroy Russia?


Tell him yes on one and no on two.


Which one was yes, go ahead and destroy Russia... or number 2?



2.  And very important, *do not* do your homework without wearing headphones.



3.  Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.



4.  There were five curtain calls. I was an actor once, damn it. Now look at me. Look at me! I won't go out there and say that stupid line one more time.




5.  Thank you for participating in our drill. Had this been an actual emergency, y'all would have been EATEN. 'Cause you don't listen! You're ignorant! How's a man gonna come crashin' through the back of a subway win - that's the problem with all y'all New Yorkers! "Oh no, we've seen it all!"




6.  And from now on, stop playing with yourself.


It *is* God.




7.  If I were creating the world I wouldn't mess about with butterflies and daffodils. I would have started with lasers, eight o'clock, Day One!



8.  Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.




9.I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.




10.What are you looking for?

A pack of Trojans!

Gee, I just ran out!

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Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

1.  The White House wants to know is everything ok with the alien space craft from Planet 10 or should we just go ahead and destroy Russia?


Tell him yes on one and no on two.


Which one was yes, go ahead and destroy Russia... or number 2?

 

Has to be Buckaroo Bonzai - unless it is a reference to same?  "Mr. Wizard was a great scientist."

 

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:


4.  There were five curtain calls. I was an actor once, damn it. Now look at me. Look at me! I won't go out there and say that stupid line one more time.

 

Galaxy Quest.  The Spock rip off was a Shakespearean actor before taking the role.  Best. Movie. Ever. 

 

Hows about--

"This could be a cultural misunderstanding."

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


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 Answers in Gene Simmons

 

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:



3.  Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass. 

Demolition Man, John Spartan getting paper by swearing. - many good ones in it

 

Not anywhere near out of material:

1-"And I am *not* intoxicated... yet!"

and same movie - "I know, I know. I'm gonna use good judgement. I haven't lost my temper in forty years, but pilgrim you caused a lot of trouble this morning, might have got somebody killed... and somebody oughta belt you in the mouth. But I won't, I won't. The *hell* I won't!"

 

2-"Ma'am, I can understand your objection to rustlin' - a girl with your background and gentle upbringing - but it's the only way we can raise money. "

"No it's not. "
" Well, what do you think we ought to do that's fittin' and proper? "
" Rob a train."

 

3-"This is like if that Blue Oyster shit met that Afghan Kush I had - and they had a baby. And then, meanwhile, that crazy Northern Light stuff I had and the Super Red Espresso Snowflake met and had a baby. And by some miracle, those two babies met and fucked - this would the shit that they birthed." 

 

4-"I thought you recognized me from my work, but you're not my demographic so I'm not offended. "

 " Well, who's your demographic? "

 " Do you like pussy? "
 " Yeah. "
 " Then not you."

 

5- "People got stoned for The Passion of the Christ? That's disturbing. "

     " It's not as disturbing as seeing it not stoned. Religion my ass, it's a straight-up snuff film."

 

____________________________________________________________
"I guess it's time to ask if you live under high voltage power transmission lines which have been shown to cause stimulation of the fantasy centers of the brain due to electromagnetic waves?" - Me

"God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent, - it says so right here on the label. If you have a mind capable of believing all three of these divine attributes simultaneously, I have a wonderful bargain for you. No checks please. Cash and in small bills." - Robert A Heinlein.


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pauljohntheskeptic

pauljohntheskeptic wrote:

2-"Ma'am, I can understand your objection to rustlin' - a girl with your background and gentle upbringing - but it's the only way we can raise money. "

"No it's not. "
" Well, what do you think we ought to do that's fittin' and proper? "
" Rob a train."

 

 

Cat Ballou?

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


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cj wrote:pauljohntheskeptic

cj wrote:

pauljohntheskeptic wrote:

2-"Ma'am, I can understand your objection to rustlin' - a girl with your background and gentle upbringing - but it's the only way we can raise money. "

"No it's not. "
" Well, what do you think we ought to do that's fittin' and proper? "
" Rob a train."

 

 

Cat Ballou?

Ding! Ding! Ding! Yep!

____________________________________________________________
"I guess it's time to ask if you live under high voltage power transmission lines which have been shown to cause stimulation of the fantasy centers of the brain due to electromagnetic waves?" - Me

"God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent, - it says so right here on the label. If you have a mind capable of believing all three of these divine attributes simultaneously, I have a wonderful bargain for you. No checks please. Cash and in small bills." - Robert A Heinlein.


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cj wrote:Hows about--"This

cj wrote:

Hows about--

"This could be a cultural misunderstanding."

 

Darn - looks like this thread died just as I got the hang of it.

 

This is Mars Attacks.

"Don't run, we are your friends!"

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


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Some of my favorites ...
  1. "Dammit, man! I'm a doctor, not a physicist!"
  2. "You know, going back in time, changing history; that's cheating."
  3. "So what kind of combat training do you have?" - "Fencing."
  4. "I may throw up on you."
  5. "Everyone, remember where we parked."

 

Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for a friend.


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How about this one."I've

How about this one.

"I've seen horror movies that start out like this"

Response, "I've seen pornos that start out like this".

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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Try this cj!!!!!!!!

 

 

                   You'd have to be over 50 anyway,  or google it [cheeting!}

 

                                _____________

 

                  Orville:    Nah I  wouldn't hit you with a blackjack Mr.Cockenlocker.

 

                  14 year old Daughter:  I can,  watch [ knocks her father out with a blackjack]  what's hard Orville.  Now run!

 

                              _____________

 

                   Daughter;   Oh Orville I was going to marry you because I am in the family way but now I love you so I can't.

 

                             ________________

 

                    Governor:  [ on a phone] That wasn't a boy scout uniform,  He's a Colonel in the state Militia has of five minutes ago.

 

                    assistent;   I dated it yesterday.

 

                    Governor:  [on phone] 5 minutes and 24 hours ago.

 

                               __________________

 

                    Lawyer;  What's the problem he signed his real name didn't he?

 

                    Daughter: We promised to use phony names. He should have signed Radskywadsky.

 

                   Lawyer;  Why didn't he sign  Radskywadsky?

 

                    Daughter; Orville wasn't even there.

 

                     Lawyer; How did you get in the family way?

 

                     Daughter; Radskywadsky was there, not Orville.

 

                      Lawyer;  who's Radskywadsky?

 

                     Daughter;   My husband but we didn't use real names, Orville was just trying to help.

 

                     Lawyer; They got 19 charges on that boy,  that's some help.

 

                           ________________

 

                      For bonus points and a hint:    It wasn't Cpt.'s  nor Cripple   but what kind of "Miricle _____    ____ "  was it.  And wht was the miricle?

"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."

VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"

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How about this one?"Would

How about this one?

"Would you like to have dinner some night?"

Response, "I like to have dinner every night"

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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Jeffrick

Jeffrick wrote:

                   You'd have to be over 50 anyway,  or google it [cheeting!}

 

I cheated, I googled it.  And I would have to be a lot older than 60 to have seen it, since it came out in 1944.  I will be 60 in a few weeks, so I wasn't born when it was released.  According to imdb, you misspelled some of the names.  But I forgive you.

 

 

Jeffrick wrote:

                      For bonus points and a hint:    It wasn't Cpt.'s  nor Cripple   but what kind of "Miricle _____    ____ "  was it.  And wht was the miricle?

 

Never saw it, sounds truly weird - The Miracle of Morgan's Creek

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


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Yes cj, it's weird and funny.

 

 

 

                    I first saw it on TV in the 60's, I just figured you had a TV in the 60's.  If you remember the year [1944} and the context [WW II} the movie was pretty racey for it's time, it's pretty racey for the 60's.

 

                      Simple storyline. A teenage girl dumps her dull boyfriend at a movie theater so she can go kiss the soldier boys good bye as they ship off to the frontlines.  She gets drunk, then gets married under a phoney name (Radskywadsky) her father the Police chief helps get rid of any and all paperwork so  there is no record of the wedding. Then she finds out she is pregnent!!  She doesn't want her small town neighbors to know she's unwed and preggers so she cons the dull  boyfriend into a psuedo-marrige so she has the paperwork for Radskywadsky.

 

                      Orville the dull guy, dresses up like a soldier then signs his real name and gets arrested for abduction, violating the Mann act and dessertion under fire.  Trust me the movie is funnier then I'm describing, eventually the governor makes him a State Colonel, there are even scenes with Rooseveldt, Hitler and Moussolini commenting on the "miracle..".

 

 

                      Now what was the "Miracle.."?

"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."

VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"

If man was formed from dirt, why is there still dirt?