the wonderful story of samson as told by me...........

dingusdangus
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the wonderful story of samson as told by me...........

good jesus freaking christ, has anyone read this nonsense?

Poor Samson, in a drunken escapade, loses a bet with some "heathens" or whatnot, and rather than pay them what he owes them, kills em all.

and then, when the authorities come to arrest him, he kills them too. all of this with the jawbone of an "ass".

then he kills a bunch more people with this incredible ass jawbone.

for one thing, anyone strong enough to kill even one person with an ass jawbone would break the jawbone immediately on that first victims skull.

I doubt very seriously that even the Worlds Strongest Man, Mariusz Pudzianowski from Poland, could kill me with the jawbone from an ass. And he is like 5 times over the WSM.

So I am supposed to believe that Samson killed thousands of people with this one jawbone?

but it gets better. as he is imprisoned, he gives up the one secret of his mass-murdering, physics-defying strength, to a woman, and for what? her sweet little beaver. and the next morning, after they made love like no one else has ever loved before, Samson awakes with no hair and no strength.

once again, the evil woman strikes down the mighty man, thus affirming in our minds the evil of poontang and women in general.


dingusdangus
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no comments huh?

I was pretty drunk when I wrote this, I don't even know what set me off thinking about it in the first place. later.


Hambydammit
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 From drink comes

 From drink comes wisdom.

Yes, it's really a very misogynistic story, and representative of the petulant nature of the Old Testament God.  I notice they don't teach this one much anymore.

 

Atheism isn't a lot like religion at all. Unless by "religion" you mean "not religion". --Ciarin

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Peppermint42
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Damn it they're onto us! 

Damn it they're onto us!  Time to put on our sexy face, ladies.  They'll forget how evil we are once we have them between the sheets...


Atheistextremist
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I always loved the story

 

Of Samson and his incredible ass.

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


Vastet
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Hambydammit wrote: From

Hambydammit wrote:

 From drink comes wisdom.

Yes, it's really a very misogynistic story, and representative of the petulant nature of the Old Testament God.  I notice they don't teach this one much anymore.

 

That would explain why I've never heard it before.

Proud Canadian, Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.


Waiting for Oblivion
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dingusdangus wrote:Poor

dingusdangus wrote:

Poor Samson, in a drunken escapade, loses a bet with some "heathens" or whatnot, and rather than pay them what he owes them, kills em all.

and then, when the authorities come to arrest him, he kills them too. all of this with the jawbone of an "ass".

then he kills a bunch more people with this incredible ass jawbone.

So I am supposed to believe that Samson killed thousands of people with this one jawbone?

This is awesome! From now on, I will train myself in the ass jawbone martial art.


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 This is the same religion

 This is the same religion that talks about turning the other cheek and peaceful shit and says atheism leads to murder and killing and oppose abortion right?


dingusdangus
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you can't be an atheist.........................................

until you have read the OT and NT at least once each thoroughly. then you will know the heart and soul and true definition of the word "nonsense".