Anyone ever gotten / seen "Awake!" the magazine?
Offline Apparently this is a pretty popular thing amongst Jehova's Witnesses...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Awake!
But, I must ask this. Is religion so insecure with itself that it has to almost lie to get your attention? On the cover of the one I found on my doorstep, it read "Can you trust the bible?" and so I was interested already, and decided to pick it up.
But as soon as I opened it and I saw all the smiley, deluded people - I knew I had been had. The article on the cover was split up into 5 parts, and titled "5 Reasons to Trust the Bible"
1) Historical Soudness
2) Candor and Honesty
3) Internal Harmony
4) Scientific Accuracy
5) Fulfilled Prophecy
Now, you see, what gets me...is that it's only example of historical soundness is a couple of characters mentioned in the bible. It's only example of candor and honesty was...well nothing, really. It's internal harmony is very vague, and to paraphrase it's own words "They all wrote about God". Scienitific Accuracy is extremely insulting, and again cites one thing - somewhere in the bible it says the Earth is round - but it forgets to mention the ones that said it was flat. And right on the next article, it talks about how it's insulting to say that Adam and Eve, the story of creation, was an allegory...how scientifically accurate. Fulfilled prophecy, again, bullshit.
Then there's articles about how to not be a slut in God's eyes, how a prisoner used religion as leverage for getting easier work assignments (seriously, that's what it said), and of course at the end how the Bible is "An Enduring Expression of God's Love" (Except for slaves, virgin girls, regular girls, women, teenagers, atheists, agnostics, different religions, apostates, rich people, first born sons, everyone and everything in the flood, intellect, justice, equality, reason, logic, science, liberals, democrats, homosexuals, etc)
Really. Seriously.
And on another note - why is it that any one who is a proponent of religion always makes an emotional appeal, not a logical one. It's always smiley, happy, dumb, ignorant and thus blissful people who say we love Jesus, we hate fuckin' fags...but they say it with such apathy, like they're on some sort of pill you'd find in an Orwellian society to keep you happy and disconnected from reality. And, of course, they all preach love and happiness but they are more hateful as they get more fundamental. But I think it's because they are really bad people, and they are know it, and therefore they try and become the bestest of friends with an invisible man so they'll get a hook up into heaven, and a shield to hide behind so they don't have to take responsibility for their own actions anymore, since they are with him ^.
End of rant.
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I received this crud just a few days ago. I read a portion of "Meeting the Needs of Today's Youth" and it was incredibly boring. I don't intend to finish reading that one. When I'm so bored I have never nothing better to do, I'll read the "Can You Trust the Bible?" issue. I think it might be a very long time before I get that bored.
Stultior stulto fuisti, qui tabellis crederes!
Yeah my mother in law got it the other day, we had a laughed ripping apart all it's inaccuracies, fallicies and false statements. Aww well.
I used to read these things pretty regulary, JWs came to my house and handed them out, now I still take them, but throw them into the recycling box.
Morte alla tyrannus et dei
I saw some lady putting one at the bus stop next to my appt. yesterday. I picked it up and it is with me now at work. It is so full of crap such as "Is God responsible for natural disasters?" The answer? no he's not, we deserve it because we sinned, we are such fuckers *rolls eyes*
1. There is no doctrinal argument based on the Bible that stands up to extended logical scrutiny (C.S. Lewis notwithstanding) and
2. People have to learn logic. It's challenging, and most still don't learn or understand it. Emotional responses are instinctive and capable of handily overriding logic and self-interest. So it works.
The authors of Awake! definitely know what they're doing, though. The thing is very skillfully crafted to draw people in by exploiting their fear, selfishness, and ignorance.
"After Jesus was born, the Old Testament basically became a way for Bible publishers to keep their word count up." -Stephen Colbert
I get it once a month because I have a neighbor who is a JW. Someday, I'll be home when she puts the shit in my door. It'll be hell to pay.
"Tis better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven." -Lucifer
I used to have a pet boxer. Very viscious looking, but a real sweet dog in reality. Whenever JW would come to the door, I would have one of my little sisters hold him back (knowing he could get away from them) All it would take is for me to raise my voice, and he would come running. He'd barrel into the screen door so hard those JW would almost litteraly piss themselves! Ah... good times!
"They always say the same thing; 'But evolution is only a theory!!' Which is true, I guess, and it's good they say that I think, it gives you hope that they feel the same about the theory of Gravity and they might just float the f**k away."
it's been years since i had any bible thumpers knocking on my door. i think they realized that folks living in trailers don't have much to drop in the collection plate, and that combined with the struggling economy has persuaded them to push their fairy tale agenda in the more upper class parts of town.
or maybe they do still come around, but simply skip our house because of the darwin fish on our cars?
www.derekneibarger.com http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=djneibarger "all postures of submission and surrender should be part of our prehistory." -christopher hitchens
Pfft, to some that would be almost an invitation. If they can convert a heathen, that'll put them in better graces with Jebus.
"They always say the same thing; 'But evolution is only a theory!!' Which is true, I guess, and it's good they say that I think, it gives you hope that they feel the same about the theory of Gravity and they might just float the f**k away."