Bible Knockers

digitalbeachbum
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Bible Knockers

As I am getting ready to leave for a wedding, two bible knockers come to my door. They have been in the neighborhood for several days now trying to convert people.

When I answered the door they do their intro, but I am short.

"Bad timing" I said.

"Oh, well we are here.." I cut him off, sorry I'm taking my wife to a wedding. Gotta run.

"Oh well we...", cut him off again, sorry gotta go, "I'm an Atheist. Not interested".

"Oh, well that would be something I want to talk to you about", he replied.

"No it isn't. I'm not going to be convinced that your fantasy is real and I'm not here to convince you that you are truly delusional" I replied.

He paused, looked at his friend, "Well maybe we can come back at a later time".

I think about it for a minute. What the fuck. Let the old man come by and I'll give him 10 minutes to give me his bullshit. Then I'll explain to him that his faith in his god is no better than any other god. Better yet, if he wants to speak to me I'm going to record him. If he doesn't let me record him then I'll tell him to take a hike.

I'll let you know how it goes.


Vastet
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That could be entertaining,

That could be entertaining, but will probably flop. The door to door salesmen rarely have a fraction of the knowledge (and I use the term extremely loosely) that theists online do. Every one I've spoken to ends up recommending you go to their church and ask the preacher when you raise the tough questions. Ironically they never do it themselves, they just keep going blindly on their way to the next potential victim.

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digitalbeachbum
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Vastet wrote:That could be

Vastet wrote:
That could be entertaining, but will probably flop. The door to door salesmen rarely have a fraction of the knowledge (and I use the term extremely loosely) that theists online do. Every one I've spoken to ends up recommending you go to their church and ask the preacher when you raise the tough questions. Ironically they never do it themselves, they just keep going blindly on their way to the next potential victim.

I thought the same thing, but I figured what the heck. It might be worth while if I can make it comical.


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digitalbeachbum wrote:As I

digitalbeachbum wrote:

As I am getting ready to leave for a wedding, two bible knockers come to my door. They have been in the neighborhood for several days now trying to convert people.

When I answered the door they do their intro, but I am short.

"Bad timing" I said.

"Oh, well we are here.." I cut him off, sorry I'm taking my wife to a wedding. Gotta run.

"Oh well we...", cut him off again, sorry gotta go, "I'm an Atheist. Not interested".

"Oh, well that would be something I want to talk to you about", he replied.

"No it isn't. I'm not going to be convinced that your fantasy is real and I'm not here to convince you that you are truly delusional" I replied.

He paused, looked at his friend, "Well maybe we can come back at a later time".

I think about it for a minute. What the fuck. Let the old man come by and I'll give him 10 minutes to give me his bullshit. Then I'll explain to him that his faith in his god is no better than any other god. Better yet, if he wants to speak to me I'm going to record him. If he doesn't let me record him then I'll tell him to take a hike.

I'll let you know how it goes.

 

I had a couple of times like that.

 

The first time was in the early 90s, these idiots walked on our porch without even asking, saw both my mom and I smoking, one guy said "You know that is bad for you"(NO SHIT DUMB ASS), so they walk closer, and as they do I over do all my body motions pulling another smoke out of my pack, by the time it is to my lips, they are face to face with us. I run it under my nose, light it and blow smoke in his face. They said nothing, turned around and left. The thing wasn't the comment, it was the trespassing that pissed me off.

 

Another time about 10 years ago, I was outside smoking, and two ladies were walking, with books in their hands, I could tell what they were doing she looked at me and said "Can we talk to you for a second". I responded "No, not interested, keep walking".

 

And even here, had some lady knock on my door, I simply said "Go peddle your superstition elsewhere".

 

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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They never show up at my

They never show up at my place, at least not when I'm awake and/or home. It's the closest thing to evidence of a god I've ever encountered. It's like they know it's a bad idea.

Of course this is counteracted by the fact that they do show up at other people's houses when I'm there. I've been offered the chance to answer their doors for them, so if their lack of showing up at my place were evidence for a god, then their showing up at other people's places is evidence of a delay in communication.

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I've had the same "You

I've had the same "You should come and talk to our (insert "spiritual" guide here)".  

When I was going though my agnostic stage in my mid teens, I did attempt a few conversations but was disappointed every time.  Even though at the time I lacked much philosophical or religious knowledge.  It was the logic that did it for me, these people were like telemarketers just reading a script.  I have even seriously considered walking to one or two churches, but I didn't have the nerve as a kid.  I wouldn't hesitate now if I had the time.

 

"Don't seek these laws to understand. Only the mad can comprehend..." -- George Cosbuc


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I have not yet talked to one

I have not yet talked to one of these people. Assuming I had the time, I would talk to them enough to debate them on the matter, and hold them to task. I know nothing would come of it, but it would be fun for me.

Interestingly enough, a pair of them came by our new house last week (we're in the process of renovating a house before we move in). I noticed a flier stuck under my windshield wiper and asked my wife about it saying "someone evangelized all over my car." She said that they came by earlier, and the best way to get rid of them is to simply walk around with goggles and a dust mask, covered in black dust, while carrying two buckets of plaster and lath. She told me that they looked at her and said "We can see that you're busy. Is there some place we can leave this?"

 

Ktulu wrote:
It was the logic that did it for me, these people were like telemarketers just reading a script.
Slightly off topic, but I got a telemarketer to go of script once. She kept trying to get back on because she didn't really know what she was talking about. My logic was sound, and I declinded her offer.


Atheistextremist
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Apologies in advance, Dig

 

 

But the topic 'Bible Knockers' whisked me all the way back to the swimming pool at Totara Springs Christian Camp....

 

 

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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How fun :)

Re :: How fun ..“It's super effective!”

digitalbeachbum wrote:
Vastet wrote:
That could be entertaining, but will probably flop. The door to door salesmen rarely have a fraction of the knowledge (and I use the term extremely loosely) that theists online do. Every one I've spoken to ends up recommending you go to their church and ask the preacher when you raise the tough questions. Ironically they never do it themselves, they just keep going blindly on their way to the next potential victim.

I thought the same thing, but I figured what the heck. It might be worth while if I can make it comical.

    It's fun to turn the tables on them. If you want them to fly out the door. I 've had a similar experience  in four separate instances /occasions.  First, To prepare,  You got to find out what kind of 'Bible knockers' they are. Find somebody who produces various tracts witnessing to their group. Then you quote  subversive bible passages, and there are many to choose from, amongst the thornier issues, to their little band,. The scenario plays out the same, in every time, it's  always the same. In my experience, The senior  member (the trainer) gets this distressed look on his face, and hits the proverbial abort button. And cannot get out of the drive-way fast enough, leaving skid marks-on-the-asphalt on their way out. My real motivation, honestly, was to get rid of them without being impolite. “It's super effective!”

  F i n


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Atheistextremist

Atheistextremist wrote:

 

 

But the topic 'Bible Knockers' whisked me all the way back to the swimming pool at Totara Springs Christian Camp....

 

 

 

 

 

No christian camp for me, but a pool club membership as a kid/teen, so yea can identify. Did however pine after one girl at the Catholic Church I went to.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


digitalbeachbum
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No visit yet, but I suspect

No visit yet, but I suspect they will return. They have been in the neighborhood three times in the last week. The two most recent times was the 3rd and the 6th. Not sure who they are, they don't dress like mormons nor do they ride bikes. I suspect they are from a small local church trying to recruit cash cows.