Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star

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Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star

 


According to scientists, the large star could be described as a tremendous ball of energy.


 
PASADENA, CA—Groundbreaking new findings announced Monday suggest the record-setting heat wave plaguing much of the United States may be due to radiation emitted from an enormous star.

Scientists believe the star, which they have named G2V65, may in fact be the same bright yellow orb seen arcing over the sky day after day, and given its extreme heat and proximity to Earth, it is likely not only to have caused the heat wave, but to be responsible for every warm day in human history.

"Our measurements indicate the massive amount of energy this thing gives off is able to travel 93 million miles and reach our planet is as little as eight and a half minutes," said Professor Mitch Kivens, an astronomer at the California Institute of Technology. "While we can't see them, we're fairly certain these infrared rays strike Earth's surface, become trapped by the atmosphere, and just heat everything up like a great big oven."

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"We originally thought that if this star was producing temperatures of 100-plus in the South and Midwest, it must be at least 100 degrees itself," Kivens added. "But it turns out it's far, far hotter than that, with a surface temperature of nearly 10,900 degrees Fahrenheit."

Kivens and his CalTech colleagues said this intense radiation, which results from constant nuclear reactions converting hydrogen to helium in the star's core, could also account for why the orb in the sky is extremely bright and difficult to stare at directly.

While scientists initially assumed the heat and luminescence of the star must make it the largest in the universe—a theory lent credence by the star appearing much bigger than other objects in the sky—they said the data actually appear to refute such a notion.

"Apparently it's gigantic simply because it's closer to us than any other star," Kivens said. "Which would also account for why we feel this particular star's heat during the day but are not warmed by the tiny blinking stars we see at night."

"It's interesting stuff," he added.

According to Kivens, the discovery has prompted researchers to explore the possibility that a variety of phenomena accompanying the heat wave could also be linked to the star, including taller grass, hot car seats, red skin burns, and sweating "even when one has just been standing there and hasn't been running around or anything."

An additional study is reportedly being conducted to determine if the unexplained shrinking of puddles until they disappear may be caused by star-hotness soaking up all the loose water. Moreover, scientists reportedly believe the heat emitted from the glowing orb could potentially be the reason why it is uncomfortable to walk on asphalt barefoot.

When asked if anything could be done to prevent or counteract the star's heat production, Kivens expressed skepticism.

"No, for the foreseeable future, I think we're locked into orbit with this thing," he said. "Although the star seems to disappear every night, 24-hour reports from around the world seem to indicate the star never leaves Earth entirely."

Residents of heat- and drought-stricken regions welcomed the findings, thankful to finally have an explanation for the high temperatures, if no relief from them.

"That makes sense, because it's usually hotter when that [star] is up in the air," said Stillwater, OK resident Asher Arps, 31, speaking to reporters as temperature rose to 110 degrees over the weekend. "I knew it lit things up, of course, but I didn't realize it could make things hot."

"The big star heats the earth, and the moon cools it—I get it," he added.

As to potential applications of the new discovery, experts acknowledge the possibilities could be limitless.

"This is a watershed moment," renewable energy specialist Dr. Martin Flint said. "Who knows where this could lead? Perhaps we could develop a method of harnessing these big star rays and transforming them into some sort of ecologically friendly power source."

"Wait, what am I saying?" he said, laughing. "I'm getting ahead of myself. We still don't understand how it's possible for that thing to be up in the sky in January when it's freezing outside."

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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 I knew this was going to

 I knew this was going to be funny as soon as I read the title. Smiling


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THE SUN IS HOT? HOLY FUCK!

THE SUN IS HOT? HOLY FUCK! YOU DON'T SAY?

I know this was meant to be sarcastic. But to say humans aren't contributing to climate change is bullshit. Once again nothing is either or. The only dispute, and sure the sun affects our climate, is how much we ourselves are contributing.

MY POINT is while I think humans DO have a huge impact on climate change combined with natural factors, why should that matter?

If you have an over flowing Porta Potty in Juno Alaska would you still use it just because it is cold?

No matter how much we are affecting the climate of the planet or how much of the change is natural we are still over polluting the planet. Eating shit from snow doesn't make it sanitary.

We cant control what the planet or sun does, but we certainly are doing a shitty job as humans managing pollution and waste.

I think, at least in the west, we are so used to our trash being taken away we forget that it ends up somewhere and does not magically disappear. I don't give a shit if the planet's temp goes down instead of up collectively, we are still going to end up wallowing in our own filth if we don't do a better job managing it.

 

 

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Umm, Brian? Even without a

Umm, Brian?

 

Even without a link, I can see that this must be from The Onion.

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 The only thing this story

 The only thing this story is missing is a quote from Al Gore saying we should blow up the star to stop global warming.


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Thats right, because making

Thats right, because making a buck is far far far more important than preventing the planet from becoming one giant toilet. As long as you get rich, who gives a fuck about the waste humans make,

You guys are seriously screwed in the head if you think humans are not affecting their environments. And again, you make such a big deal about no evidence that the temp is going up because of humans.

IT SHOULDN'T MATTER, a cold clogged toilet is still a cold clogged toilet. If you think our planet can continue to absorb the waste we make without effecting us you are delusional.

Just me alone, I put out a couple pounds of trash a week. Multiply that by 7 billion, then multiply that by 52 weeks. And where is it all going? Is there a magical trash pixy that magically makes it disappear?

If you really think that, let your trash pile up in your house during the winter and never take it out. After all, if it is cold outside that should keep your house sanitary, right?

 

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Brian, click me hard!!!

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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

Umm, Brian?

 

Even without a link, I can see that this must be from The Onion.

I got that part. Which is why I said it was sarcastic.

It still doesn't change that global world industry pays off goverments around the world to produce the increasing waste beyond what an individual may produce. Collectively if the amount of waste produced by humans continues it wont matter if the earth is getting warmer or colder.

We need to pollute less and we need to manage pollution better no matter what the planet or sun are doing naturally.

 

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Yeah this isn't particularly

Yeah this isn't particularly funny as satire. Seems like it was written by a denier of climate change. The whole reason we have the atmosphere we do is the life on this world that has shaped it. Suggesting the sun is the sole factor in the Earths temperature is beyond ridiculous. About as ridiculous as suggesting carbon alone will heat the Earth more than a few degrees.

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You don't seem to get it

You don't seem to get it either.

 

 

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I do get it. It's idiocy in

I do get it. It's idiocy in print that fails to be funny because it too closely parallels the reality of denial of reality.

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Someone pass Vastet the

Someone pass Vastet the bong, he needs to relax.  I, for one, found it funny.  This article epitomizes levity. 

 

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Funny where this thread's gone.

 

Ktulu wrote:

 

Someone pass Vastet the bong, he needs to relax.  I, for one, found it funny.  This article epitomizes levity. 

 

 

I actually didn't think about climate change when I read it - it just seemed a humorous astronomical observation of the bleeding obvious. Sun hot and moon cold seemed to swing the discussion away from climate change and into pure silly. 

Given the greenhouse is caused primarily by water vapour (70 per cent) and carbon dioxide (25 per cent) you could argue the sun is the same old thing it ever was. We can hardly blame our sweaty predicament on a most convenient star. 

I wonder if the author considered potential reactions from the readership...and there is that parallel of denial. No doubt intentional.  

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Lol.  

Lol. 

 

Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare


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p { margin-bottom: 0.08in; }

p { margin-bottom: 0.08in; }

In other news, there is a scientist who did not know what level of gamma rays he was exposed to.

 

Depending on your source, he was named either David or Bruce. The choice of names determines whether the exposure was a lab accident or the result of an aboveground nuclear test.

 

Either way, don't get him angry. You would not like him when he is angry.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOXpKUu6pUg

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Vastet wrote:Yeah this isn't

Vastet wrote:
Yeah this isn't particularly funny as satire. Seems like it was written by a denier of climate change. The whole reason we have the atmosphere we do is the life on this world that has shaped it. Suggesting the sun is the sole factor in the Earths temperature is beyond ridiculous. About as ridiculous as suggesting carbon alone will heat the Earth more than a few degrees.

Considering that without any atmosphere on Earth, our oceans would be frozen solid as would be whatever water exists on Venus without it's atmposphere, I'd say YEAH, there isn't any one sole contributing factor to global temperature shifts.

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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Science is working on the

Science is working on the problem of global warming:

Video: NASA rockets inflatable heat shield 124 miles up, deploys it successfully.

 

Funny how all the environmentalist leftist that are so concerned about global warming didn't have a problem with defunding NASA and private space contractors. The technology is nearly there to stop global warming and one day droughts and floods. But the USA isn't going to have a heavy lift rocket or much of anything except trillions of unfunded entitlements.

Stop global whining, much more grave threat.

 

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EXC wrote:Science is working

EXC wrote:

Science is working on the problem of global warming:

Video: NASA rockets inflatable heat shield 124 miles up, deploys it successfully.

 

Funny how all the environmentalist leftist that are so concerned about global warming didn't have a problem with defunding NASA and private space contractors. The technology is nearly there to stop global warming and one day droughts and floods. But the USA isn't going to have a heavy lift rocket or much of anything except trillions of unfunded entitlements.

Stop global whining, much more grave threat.

 

Yeah... with such a tiny object in orbit around us, it's a wonder we're not in another ice age. [/sarcasm]

By the time science manages to cause a measurable drop in temperature with these orbital structures without bankrupting an entire nation, I will be leader of the of the free world. I would add that global fearmongering is a much more grave threat, though.

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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Vastet wrote:I do get it.

Vastet wrote:
I do get it. It's idiocy in print that fails to be funny because it too closely parallels the reality of denial of reality.

Ditto, but for different reasons. It simply isn't that amusing when compared to other samples of satire, IMO because of it's shit execution. The fact that it touches on a bitter issue for many, probably doesn't help.

When I run into walking abortions like this onion article, my first response is "I must've missed the punchline", even though the punchline is abundantly visible.

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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In More Pseudosilly Scientific News....

 

Scientists Say Newly Discovered Earthlike Planet Could Support Robust Economy

 SANTA CRUZ, CA—Astronomers at the University of California, Santa Cruz, announced Friday that preliminary studies of Gliese 581g, a habitable planet orbiting a red dwarf star 20 light-years away, indicate its conditions are perfect to support a booming economy. "With the possibility of a nitrogen-oxygen atmosphere, the likelihood of water sources, and no indication of local zoning laws or taxes, conditions on Gliese 581g are almost textbook≠perfect for the industrial sector," said Professor Steven S. Vogt, the planet's discoverer, adding that he would not be surprised to find the planet was well-suited to host basic forms of employment. "With its unmatched areas for growth, especially in the real estate and manufacturing fields, I would advise immediate investment." Vogt said that because the planet's gravity was conducive to human beings walking on its surface, he saw no reason why people from Earth wouldn't one day be able to invest in risky speculative bubbles on Gliese 581g that would drive the planet into complete economic free fall. 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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James Cameron beat you to

James Cameron beat you to the punch on that.  And he gets a slice of the cash on all new 3D productions as well.

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My all time favorite Onion

My all time favorite Onion is still the Gay Scientists Discover Christian Gene

 

 


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Rather than the Onion

 

Ktulu wrote:

My all time favorite Onion is still the Gay Scientists Discover Christian Gene

 

that report came from Australia's own CNNNN - a tongue-in-cheek news service that boasted the motto "We report, you believe..."

It's rather like the Onion though perhaps a little further to the left.

Here's more of their work.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRrEfuEMmyA

 

The second one is longer but funnier. One the Chaser hosts dresses as Osama and crashes the APEC Summit in Sydney. Apparently the snipers on the roof were laughing their heads off...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOEWd_M5m44 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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The OP reminded me of this

The OP reminded me of this classic from FSTDT:

Quote:
One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it.

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Kapkao wrote: By the time

Kapkao wrote:

 

By the time science manages to cause a measurable drop in temperature with these orbital structures without bankrupting an entire nation, I will be leader of the of the free world. I would add that global fearmongering is a much more grave threat, though.

In case you haven't seen the news, we're already broke. The national debt is actually over 100Trillion if you add up all the unfunded liabilites thanks to entitlements. NASA's budge for 2011 $18.7Billion. So I don't think NASA is going to be the one's bankrupting us.

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EXC wrote:Kapkao wrote: By

EXC wrote:

Kapkao wrote:

 

By the time science manages to cause a measurable drop in temperature with these orbital structures without bankrupting an entire nation, I will be leader of the of the free world. I would add that global fearmongering is a much more grave threat, though.

In case you haven't seen the news, we're already broke. The national debt is actually over 100Trillion if you add up all the unfunded liabilites thanks to entitlements. NASA's budge for 2011 $18.7Billion. So I don't think NASA is going to be the one's bankrupting us.

Problems with relevance: I wasn't talking about NASA, or the US just by itself, and if you want to derail a satire thread on a highly irrelevant finances discussion, go ahead and prove it. Yeah, we're in trouble, but not "100trillion" trouble.

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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 Kapkao wrote: EXC

 

Kapkao wrote:

 
EXC wrote:
 
Kapkao wrote:
      By the time science manages to cause a measurable drop in temperature with these orbital structures without bankrupting an entire nation, I will be leader of the of the free world. I would add that global fearmongering is a much more grave threat, though.  
  In case you haven't seen the news, we're already broke. The national debt is actually over 100Trillion if you add up all the unfunded liabilites thanks to entitlements. NASA's budge for 2011 $18.7Billion. So I don't think NASA is going to be the one's bankrupting us.  
  Problems with relevance: I wasn't talking about NASA, or the US just by itself, and if you want to derail a satire thread on a highly irrelevant finances discussion, go ahead and prove it. Yeah, we're in trouble, but not "100trillion" trouble.  
  http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/TR/TR07/IV_LRest.html#wp239829 Social Security trustee report   https://www.cms.gov/ReportsTrustFunds/downloads/tr2009.pdf Medicare trustees report      

Actually, it is when you add in the unfunded obligations of SS ($15.75 trillion) and medicare ($36.4 trillion) current national debt ($14.6 trillion)  the projected deficits over the next 10 years alone ($13.6 trillion) while still adding an estimated $1.9 trillion a year before SS and medicare start adding substantially to the debt. These numbers assume that GDP grows at 2.2% which at present appears quite optimistic (real gdp decreased 0.2% 2007 to 2011 and only had a 0.4% growth rate the first quarter of 2011). Nor have any of these estimates factored in higher interest rates that could occur due to our credit rating being downgraded. Suddenly a "$100 trillion" problem is not very unrealistic at all unless we do something very soon. In fact, unless we do something radical, the problem will be substantially larger.

  One economics professor I trust ran the numbers using Ryan's "radical" budget and came up with unfunded obligations of the US government around $106 trillion by 2085. The GDP of the entire world is an estimated $58.26 trillion. Of course, you and me will probably be dead by then and global warming will finish off the rest so who cares anyway, right?

 


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Sure, I don't love

Sure, I don't love entitlement programs anymore than you do, BS or EXC... and IIRC, they aren't all that constitution-friendly. But we aren't facing a "100trillion" pricetag this year, and for all intents and purposes, the "100trillion" pricetag is an estimation of what might happen in 10 years. What is the taxflow amount to federal government over the same 10 year span, keeping in mind that we would likely still be borrowing 40 cents of every dollar spent?

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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 I don't think EXC was

 I don't think EXC was specifying what is due tomorrow. Simply stating that we have a $100 trillion problem and is what will happen unless we do something about it today (which we won't). If we payed the price tag this year, somewhere around $30 trillion would keep SS and medicare solvent if they took it and put it in a trust fund and didn't touch it. Except, we don't have $30 trillion (this number was off the top of my head, I can do the math if you wish but it really is irrelevant.)

 

The estimated tax flow to the government using Bama's proposed budget (means repealing Bush tax cuts, a few other tax increases and as I pointed out before, what I believe is a rosy prediction of future gdp) and  from 2012-2021 is $38.747 trillion.

 

As far as percentage of gdp, to pay for SS and medicare we would have to increase taxes ~8.1% of the gdp in perpetuity if we raised taxes today (this number comes directly from adding the numbers in the trustees reports). That means everyone would have to pay ~81% more than they are paying now (including payroll taxes). Since current revenues already fall short by 40% we would have to almost double our current tax rates in addition to the 81%.

 

So to break it down, look at 2011's numbers. The government brought in $2.174 trillion and will pay out ~$3.819 trillion. To cover SS and medicare we would need an additional $1.76 trillion. So to balance the budget and save enough for SS & medicare we would need revenue of ~$5.579 this year. Than means everyone would have to pay ~ 157% more ($2.174 * 2.57= $5.587). That includes the payroll tax. So even someone who currently makes $30k a year currently pays $2295 FICA tax and probably around $1500 income tax after deductions credits etc. would have to pay ~ $9750 in taxes ($3795 * 2.57). You can calculate what your own tax rate would have to be simply by multiplying everything you paid by 2.57. Those in the upper tax brackets would see our taxes go north of 70% just for federal. 

 

Of course tax rates would have to be even higher than that because when they get that high there is great incentive to pay "under the table", evade taxes or simply not work so the tax base would constrict (yours truly would quit just on principle). That is also before we talk about extra coming in to pay off our existing debt. And every year that we do nothing, the required tax raises/spending cuts become greater.

 

One way or the other, we do have a real ~$100 trillion gap that we have to address either through increasing revenue or cutting promised benefits and procrastinating only is going to make it worse.