Dear God: Get the Hell Out of Our Schools!
Whatever happened to the separation of church and state?
I know, it’s actually the “principle of state neutrality” but let’s not split hairs right now.
Our schools are even more tainted than those in your country – the U S of A – where the teaching of creationism as science in public schools is deemed unconstitutional.
Here, taxpayer dollars fund religious schools, as well as chaplaincy programs for public and private schools.
And it’s a bit more than 30 pieces of silver. That great galumphing God-botherer, Kevin Rudd, increased the funding to $222 million. (Does he bother you? He sure as hell bothered us.)
According to the website, school chaplains are “in the prevention and rescue business… helping students find a better way to deal with family breakdown, loneliness, drug abuse, depression and suicide”.
In the words of Voltaire, “Nothing can be more contrary to religion and the clergy than reason and common sense”.
Frankly, I don’t want someone from a religious order messing with my kids’ heads. That’s my job.
Surely the money should be spent on someone trained in this area, like a child psychologist or family counsellor?
Furthermore, I don’t want anyone from a religious order anywhere near my children without supervision.
Then there are the brainwashing sessions, erm, I mean Scripture Classes.
Several friends have been shocked and dismayed by what came out of their children’s mouths during their first week at school.
Forget the 3 Rs. “Mummy, did you know that God made my arm?” one five-year-old said. “And he made all the birds and the trees and everything. That story you tell about the monkeys, it’s not true!”
And from another, after her mother had dropped a bowl on the kitchen floor and exclaimed “Jesus”: “Mummy don’t say that, you’ll go to hell.”
Both girls brought home colouring pages entitled “God’s creations”.
My girlfriend Lisa lamented, “I wish they were teaching her more useful stuff, but I don’t want to take her out of Scripture Class because she might be ostracised”.
Thank God (if indeed you had a say in this) that NSW is bringing in Ethics Classes as an alternative.
Some of those mad Pentecostals are teaching kids that there’s fossil evidence of man and dinosaurs walking the earth together.
Sometimes I feel like that in the executive suites of TV networks, but that’s the exception rather than the rule.
If we wanted a religious education, we would have sent our kids to a Christian school.
As for the historical aspect of the Bible, surely that could be taught in high school, when kids have the capacity for critical thought?
In primary school, they tend to believe everything they are told.
I had to Google ‘Darwin’s Theory of Evolution’ to prove to my son that creationism was questionable.
As Griffith University humanities lecturer Paul Williams says, “It’s up there with the world being occupied by aliens since Roswell”.
(No offense, Almighty.)
And don’t even get me started on the National Curriculum.
Some folks are saying Intelligent Design will be taught in state schools in the subject of Ancient History.
So God, in summing up, if kids want to believe in you they can do so as consenting adults.
In the meantime, please instruct your representatives to keep their rosary off my progeny.
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck