Maybe this one will be better.

Brian37
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Maybe this one will be better.

Haven't named it yet.

 

Oh grand Phallus

You live

In a palace

Wearing your phony crown

 

But atoms and quarks

Defy your remarks

For in the end

We lose all sound

 

The sun will expand

Making coal of the land

And with it too

The myth you spew

 

Impressed not the least

With your strut

Impoverished player

Reality guts

 

In gaps you fill

With magical spells

Wane through generations

Morphing into newer fables

 

Beseeching is reason

You can't hold hostage

Free from your shackles

My mind grasps knowledge

 

Transparent friends

Fall prey to truth

Your god is not needed

And neither are you

 

 

 

 

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


Sapient
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 You're last one was fine,

 You're last one was fine, don't listen to the lone hater.

- Brian Sapient


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Brian37
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Sapient wrote: You're last

Sapient wrote:

 You're last one was fine, don't listen to the lone hater.

Brian, it's ok. I do have my "moments" and that last poem was much like beer goggles and waking up in the morning with a feeling of coyote ugly in looking at who you slept with.

This one however, I am much more attune to defending.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


Brian37
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I have had a fixation in

I have had a fixation in trying to work in Shakespeare's "life is but a poor player" line. So "Impoverished player" is an homage to that line and the recognition that this is all there is.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


dingusdangus
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Brian37 wrote:Sapient

Brian37 wrote:

Sapient wrote:

 You're last one was fine, don't listen to the lone hater.

Brian, it's ok. I do have my "moments" and that last poem was much like beer goggles and waking up in the morning with a feeling of coyote ugly in looking at who you slept with.

This one however, I am much more attune to defending.

I don't like being labeled a "hater" and so I apologized. and I actually get the gist of your poetry, you are lashing out at things you don't like and don't believe in. but maybe you should study some good poetry and try to branch out a little bit and veer from your course of 4 word lines and back and forth over/under dramatization that hinders you. I think that you are falsely assuming that everyone has ADD and it shows in your work.

and another contribution from me to the world of poetry as inspired by brian!!!!

Perchance it be that just like you

In the closet  I'm a eunuch too

Love not lost but oh so few

The times I spent without a clue

And for this Brian I do weep

That his conscience and tenderness must run so deep

As the apologies and the anger and venom spew

So must the words of poets ring true.

 

 

 

 


iwbiek
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my biggest poetic influences

my biggest poetic influences are charles bukowski, leonard cohen, and dylan thomas.  if that tells you anything.

wait i don't know how the fuck that is relevant to anything.

i just got back from this year's wassail btw and i am fuckin blitzed on plum brandy and cheap slovak vodka.  and i just sang wham's "last christmas" with a bunch of guys from the village.

god i love the holidays.

"I asked my father,
I said, 'Father change my name.'
The one I'm using now it's covered up
with fear and filth and cowardice and shame."
--Leonard Cohen


Brian37
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I like my style. BTW, here

I like my style. BTW, here is one of my favorite poems from some stupid bitch who also IN THAT POEM used the same format. You might know her.

http://www.simonhuggins.com/uricon/classic/plath_sylvia/cut.htm

And some other stupid bitch who used the same format IN THAT POEM:

http://www.bartleby.com/113/4006.html

I am being sarcastic in my "fist shaking", because I have heard it all before. Hunter's Rapsody was a bad dream, I admit. But this one here that I started in this thread, I like, and I also like the format I use. And like I said, if I were in it for the money, I'd care.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


Sapient
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dingusdangus wrote:Brian37

dingusdangus wrote:

Brian37 wrote:

Sapient wrote:

 You're last one was fine, don't listen to the lone hater.

Brian, it's ok. I do have my "moments" and that last poem was much like beer goggles and waking up in the morning with a feeling of coyote ugly in looking at who you slept with.

This one however, I am much more attune to defending.

I don't like being labeled a "hater" and so I apologized. and I actually get the gist of your poetry, you are lashing out at things you don't like and don't believe in. but maybe you should study some good poetry and try to branch out a little bit and veer from your course of 4 word lines and back and forth over/under dramatization that hinders you. I think that you are falsely assuming that everyone has ADD and it shows in your work.

and another contribution from me to the world of poetry as inspired by brian!!!!

Perchance it be that just like you

In the closet  I'm a eunuch too

Love not lost but oh so few

The times I spent without a clue

And for this Brian I do weep

That his conscience and tenderness must run so deep

As the apologies and the anger and venom spew

So must the words of poets ring true.

 

Good post.

- Brian Sapient


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dingusdangus
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That Sylvia Plath garbage.......................................

is actually worse than your stuff. I am amazed that dogshit like that ever gets published or receives any recognition of any kind. Just because Nicole Kidman was in some horrible movie about Sylvia doesn't mean that her "poetry" wasn't the crap that it was. Please don't tell me your favorite painter is Jackson Pollack. Those two, geez, they are a crime against paper and canvas.


Brian37
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dingusdangus wrote:is

dingusdangus wrote:

is actually worse than your stuff. I am amazed that dogshit like that ever gets published or receives any recognition of any kind. Just because Nicole Kidman was in some horrible movie about Sylvia doesn't mean that her "poetry" wasn't the crap that it was. Please don't tell me your favorite painter is Jackson Pollack. Those two, geez, they are a crime against paper and canvas.

LOL.......................WOW...............just............wow. If that Plath poem was worse than the one I posted here, I'll take that as a complement.

Again, most of the stuff I post is junk and therapy, I will admit. But to trash that particular Plath poem, you have got to have got to be smoking something.

 

 

 

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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Potential Title: Truth

Potential Title: Truth devours.

Good stuff. And who cares if it's therapy or w/e. Keep writing poetry as if your screaming at the world.

_0.0-
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Brian37
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noafterlifenow

noafterlifenow wrote:

Potential Title: Truth devours.

Good stuff. And who cares if it's therapy or w/e. Keep writing poetry as if your screaming at the world.

Actually I did name it on another message board. "Peity". Yes, I am writing screaming at the world. But not out of hate, but more like telling my friends(humanity) to get their heads out of their asses.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37