Didja know that we're the ..1 most hated minority group in the US as measured by whom you'd least like your offspring to marry? Goes blacks, arabs, and then atheists. It's in July's Harper's Index if ya don't believe me. I'm honored to count you as a virtual friend. I'm also a pisser who has been arguing religious people to a standstill since I could talk. Yep--I was born and raised atheist. I don't have that gaping hole in my mind caused by leftover brain damage from having a god crammed down your throat before you were old enough to have defenses against that sort of shit. So I've had that argument so many times I could practically script it--it always ends with "I made a leap of faith" which translates to, "I reallly really wanna believe this!" Hell, I wrote all this out some time ago, and pretty damn well too, if I do pat myself on the back. Here, check it:

Hey Christians!
I just figured out how to explain to you, in terms you can understand, how collossally fucking arrogant you are. First of all, you gotta realize that the only difference between a christian and an atheist is a 'leap of faith'. Trust me on this one--I don't have time to go over it all with you, but I've argued enough christians to a standstill to know where it all ends. Once you get past all the illogical horseshit, it comes down to a leap of faith. "I know it's illogical and unexplainable, but I believe anyway". That's a leap of faith. Any theologian will tell you the same thing. Philosophers resolved this one long ago. Think about what that means for a bit. That's the exact same fucking thing as saying, "I know this isn't true, but I really really want it to be true, so I'm agonna believe it anyway." By believing it anyway, you declare yourself able to obviate the laws of nature. You are basically declaring that you are a magician, and can make shit true when it isn't. You are, in essence, declaring that you are god yourself; that you alone are capable of defining what IS. Can't you see, not only the belligerent ignorance there, but the arrogance? We all want to believe shit that ain't true. "People like me". "She'd never cheat on me". "I could never kill anyone". But there's a way of determining whether things are true or not. It's called OBSERVATION. If I say the sun's shining, you can just look out a window to see if that's true or not. Observation. All the lying to yourself in the world ain't gonna change the earth's rotational position vis a vie the sun. You are declaring yourself able to make the sun shine at midnight just because you want it to be so. Delusional fruitcakes, all of ya. Arrogant, destructive delusional fruitcakes. Granted, there's lots of shit that's been observed to be true that's really fucking complicated. Evolution, for example. But just because you're too stupid, lazy, or willfully ignorant to understand it doesn't give you the power to annul fundamental logic. 1+1 doesn't equal twelve just because you say so, and the contortions you go through to convince yourself thus are absurd. Everything is explainable through observation (and its friends deduction and induction) without resorting to fairytale bullshit. Everything, that is, except the question "Why is there something rather than nothing?" Verdict's still out on that one, but you've got one of two ways to go. Either accept your ignorance (I do), or posit an initial push from a god figure. Even if you assume, with exactly ZERO EVIDENCE, the existance of a god-figure, deducing a whole theology from that one supposition is fucking outlandish; analogous to assuming that because you guess the letter 'A' exists that you are capable of writing a novel. Every time science stomps out some superstitious nonsense y'all believe, you first shoot the messenger (real classy), then you try to kill everybody who heard the message to quarantine it (fucking barbaric), then, after a hundred years of inflicting misery on the thinking class, you accept the message and modify your doctrine while stringently avoiding the fact that your whole premise is wrong. The reason you never win these battles is that science is not a competing theology, no matter how hard you try to cast it as such to stir up some bloodlust in the masses. Even if you manage to quarantine the message, somebody else will discover it again. That's the funny thing about facts. They don't change. Unlike your horseshit that bends with the wind. You'll spout any shite if you think you can make people believe it. You're worse than used-car salesmen. Yeah, science can be wrong, and often is, but science is a work in progress. Science, literally, is the collected, verifiable observations of the species. It's not a doctrine. But you think that, since you are god and get to determine fact vs. fiction, that the other guy (the scientist) is just pissing on your shoes by taking your god-role away. He threatens you. You want to be god, goddammit! No, worse, you've spent the past however many years of your life working hard to convince yourself that you ARE god. He's attacking the fundamental core of your arrogance, and you can't imagine a life without arrogance. I mean--if you've been a god, who the hell wants to go back to being just a man? Fuck that egghead who thinks he can be god. He's funny-looking, and lacks social skills. Let's kill him! You fucking cretins make me sick. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the horrendous misery you inflict on the world to prop up your own delusional belief. But you do. Christians are a cancer on the fucking species, and you'll kill us all, literally, before you self-centered imbicils will give up the glory of god. Lust for glory. Real noble. Oh well. Maybe the dolphins will do better. You know man's place in things? We're fucking scavengers. We're rats and vultures and crabs. How much meat you think we really caught way back in the day before tools? You ever try to catch a wild animal with your bare hands? Pretty fucking hard, 'eh? And yet we evolved a digestive system that can handle meat. Poorly, and with a lot of help from the rot-bacteria that live in your belly, but it can handle it. How you think that happened, ya fucktarts? Why do you think rats so accurately model human behavior in psyche tests? All you are is a herbivore/scavenger with a freak mutation in your forebrain. But christians can't handle being overgrown trashmen. They want to be predators. Christians are all about the free market, where every man predates on another and the most vicious are rewarded. Fuck all that flock of sheep shit. I judge you by your actions, not your words, and you are clearly the most vicious fucks the planet has ever seen. Everything else is just lies you tell yourselves so you can sleep at night. Base fucking filth. Everything about your religion is disgusting: your twisted sexual mores that warp one of the most beautiful things about life into a bitter, self-hating activity; your violent exclusionism and obnoxious self-righteousness; the schism you create between your mind and body; the destruction you inflict on the curiosity and creativity of your children; your entrenched and essential position in the feudal power structure that creates such misery in the world; your attempts to monopolize the essential human need for escapism to prevent people from escaping your clutches; the torture with which you threaten your children to enforce conformity (hell); your sadistic/masochistic worship of an incredible act of brutality (the crucifixion); the absolute ownership over people's most precious possesion, their minds, to which you claim exclusive entitlement; but most of all, your ability to dehumanize anyone with something you want and torture and/or kill hir without conscience. Because you wield ultimate power in the world, and have for the past three hundred years, you've created a world in your image. You prosletyzed at swordpoint and spread your memes worldwide. Now the consistent series of psychological abuses you inflict on your children has become normatized worldwide. You set out to christianize the planet--well, you've largely succeeded. Everyone else has had to learn to be as vicious as you are. Either that, or they end up stomped under your boot; picking your cotton while you sip sweet tea on the porch. There is an ancient Chinese curse--may you get what you wish for. Well, you got it. And now you're getting old and fat and lazy and self-destructive and your time in the sun is waning. Your students have learned their lessons well, and I intend to sit back and watch them destroy you. Wearing nothing but a schadenfreud smile. Nothing will improve--you let this cat out of the box, and there ain't no putting it back. Whoever replaces you will be as bad or worse. But you fuckers started it all. You exalted and perfected the paradigm whereby a few utterly amoral men rule the many, brutally, for their own aggrandizement. Any good that came from those pretty words in the sermon on the mount is so far outweighed by the evil you perpetrate as to make laughable any claims to the moral high ground. It's patently obvious that your morality is just to keep the serfs in line. I've got more respect for a crack dealer than a preacher--they both do the exact same thing for a living, but a crack dealer is at least honest about his intentions. Suck on that for a while, fuckwads.