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Recently I find myself looking skyward. What if I am wrong the creeping in of doubts the feeling of emptiness. It strikes me as irrational I know but it is a feeling that frightens me on some level. Perhaps it is bacuse I am new to this, and I usually just brush it aside but last night I explored this ?yearning? for doG. It makes you feel a little impotent knowing that you have one short life and really that?s it??very few will make it to have stamped a mark on humanity, to many drones, many of us will vanish into the dust of history, never to be heard of again. A humbling and at the same time sobering thought, it is not death that makes me afraid so much as it is being forgotten, being as if I never existed and what then of the aspirations? what then of the dreams of SAVAGE??.gone, turned to dust like the memories.

While I was drinking Vodka with an Estonian/Russian earlier on last week, he told me a saying his [/b]Babushka[/b] told him:

?You spend your whole life learning, and yet you die stupid!?

So what is the point of life? why are we here? What purpose do we serve? What is the point? I may never know, but I am trying to work it out and hopefully one day we have a rational answer.








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We weren't put here for a meaning, because there was no one to create a meaning for us. But we can make our own meaning: To be happy. That's all. Enjoy life, and help others by making them feel happy too.

There's a difference between existing and living. I choose to live.

"While I am opposed to all orthodox creeds, I have a creed myself; and my creed is this. Happiness is the only good. The time to be happy is now. The place to be happy is here. The way to be happy is to make others so. This creed is somewhat short, but it is long enough for this life, strong enough for this world. If there is another world, when we get there we can make another creed. But this creed certainly will do for this life." ? Robert G. Ingersoll, 1882

Wilson: "We were afraid that if you found out you solved a case with absolutely no medical evidence you'd think you were God." House: "God doesn't limp."

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Well SAVAGE, I guess I try to look at it this way. The entire 13.7 billion year history of the universe, and every little thing that has ever happened has all worked perfectly to bring you into existance. This is not the purpose of the universe (if there is one) But merely an effect. So now here you are, one amidst billions of humans currently living, all of whom face this very same question. Humans do nothing without a purpose (however unconcious we may be of whatever this purpose is) And thus it seems natural to us to question the purpose of our existance. We long for a reason to be. But why should there be a reason for us to be here? When I peer through my telescope or binoculars, or even just my naked eye, looking out at the wide wide universe, it occurs to me that there are likely billions of other "intelligent" lifeforms out there, some of whom probably have similar enough "brain" chemistry that they are doign the same thing, wondering why they are there, what purpose do they serve? I don't have an answer, other than that, IF there is a purpose of some kind, it must universally apply to all those other lifeforms as well. Since I've yet to find anyone who espouses (I KNOW thats not the right spelling, is it?) a purpose that is not utterly human-centred, rationally, I must come to the conclusion that there IS no purpose, and that we are just here. It's up to us where we want to go from there. I try to remind myself often of just how incredibly lucky I am to be here at all. If even the tinyest thing had been different, if a neutron sized clump of dark matter had been HERE instead of THERE in the first few instants of time after the big bang, that our galaxy would never have formed, and we wouldnt be here to break our brains with such complex and deep questions. So, we truly are the lucky few. Those who, whether by chance or design, are HERE at all. That gives me the strength to go on living. Now here's what makes it a JOY to go on living. I have to go in a second, so I'll just compile a short list.

Good books
Good friends
Sex. (Even bad sex is still pretty good!)
Good laughs (This is very high on my personal list)
My family
Good music
and reefer.

Frankly, the list goes on indefinitly, and is different for each person. If you really enjoy pondering such things, I suggest rounding up an old dusy pair of binoculars lying around your house, and going out to look at the stars next clear night. Definitly check out some online resources first, to find out what to look for. You'd be amazed at what's out there.

Ok, well that's like the intro paragraph on why I keep going. I could write a book. Have fun!

I vote YES http//

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I make the best of what I have to work with.

I?ve been hit by a dump trunk, that was a bad year, but each day is better somehow now.

The Emptiness of Theology
-- Richard Dawkins