Christian excuses

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Christian excuses

Don't you love some of the excuses Christians make for the absurd and immoral things in the Bible? They always manage to come up with something, too. Here I'm going to tell a silly little story, pose objections and answer them the way a Christian would if it was biblical. Feel free to raise your own and I'll try to answer.

My great-great grandfather came here on the Mayflower. He needed to make a living so he started raising pigs. He had a very large succesful pig farm fairly quickly. Well, eventually he got tired of doing it so he killed them all. He needed to do something with all that pork, so he made it into sausage and bought some cheese, candy, etc. He psychicly predicted how well it would sell - he was the guy who invented those things you get around Christmas that has all that stuff in!


1. The Mayflower was way too long ago for your great great grandfather to have been on it!

It wasn't the original, it was a replica.

2. It was wrong of him to kill all the pigs just because he was tired of pig farming.

He bought raised and owned the pigs, they were his to do what he wanted with.

3. Psychic powers are not real.

Prove they aren't! Better yet, prove the whole story didn't happen!

4. Those little sampler things weren't around until (whenever) and were invented by (whoever.)

Yeah, well my ancestor came up with the idea, and just wasn't succesful or the idea was stolen from him!

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