Jesus
Posted on: April 11, 2007 - 9:40pm
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Jesus
i was just thinking the other day, what if jesus(pretending for a minute he was real) was the son of satan. to me, it would actually make more sense.
for one thing, jesus did show off. walking on water is not needed. if he was really who he said he was he would be more humble.
jesus died on the cross for our sins. wtf? hes dead... we're free? that doesnt make sense. god says we'll all be free if his son dies, like theres something higher than him that he has no control over. hes god, its like saying "im going to kill my son so i can go and buy some pop tarts".
wouldnt it be the ultimate blow from satan if he made everybody believe that if we follow his teachings, ask forgiveness etc we will go to heaven?
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Well, it would make more sense if the Bible was written by Satan.
I have thought this for a while. All the negative attributes theists give to satan can also be said about their god and jesus.
Since none of them exist and the bible was written by men in caves, I feel pretty safe.
I've had a different thought floating through my head. Jebus came to earth to save us from original sin and from being destined to hell no matter what. The god of the old testament was an evil, jealous, obnoxious bastard who demanded worship. Since Jebus, that god has seemed to not exist any more and in fact there seems to be little to no sign of god in the 2000 years since. Maybe the god of the old testament is actually satan?
Organised religion is the ultimate form of blasphemy.
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I'd like to see a Christian response.
I should point out that it's just a thought floating through my head, nothing more. It's not a theory, it's not my belief, it's not my claims, I haven't done any research to back up or dismiss this thought ... yet.
Organised religion is the ultimate form of blasphemy.
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All right, you bunch of gnostics.
Try 'googling' or whatever search engine for 'gnostic demiurge' and you might see that we aren't the only crazies with weird ideas,.
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Yep. I think there's a good case to be made that Satan (i.e. human self-deception) wrote the Bible. I would love to see an addendum to the Bible, the Gospel of Satan, where Satan confesses that he wrote the Bible. He would detail the origins of the Bible itself, saying how corrupt people were at the heart of its corruption, etc. He would lay out the deception in the bible and show how if you believe the lies, you will tend to behave as if you were worshipping evil. Come on, Jesus is a frickin zombie or vampire or something, maybe a combination of both. Surely the blood drinking and flesh eating are symbols of worshipping death and mayhem. But the believers in the Bible are deceived by Satan into seeing their actions as symbolic of some wonderful fantasy.
The Bible was written to tempt man away from God (truth) by Satan (deception). The bible is the apple. Eating it, i.e. believing the Genesis story, causes an entire mythology to spring forth in your mind, but it's mostly deception.
I don't know. There's something about that idea that just fits.
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Yeah, it's definitely got a gnostic feel to it. Though my version, the idea of a Gospel of Satan, seems to be at least somewhat original. I was also thinking about a Gospel of Jesus, where Jesus explains what is true (backed by evidence) and what is deception (unfalsifiable claims) in the Bible. Essentially, you get, straight from the source, the solution to the puzzle of the Bible. And of course, the solution will teach secular critical thinking, and rational ethical morality. I've got lots of ideas for where it could go. The essential idea is to rewrite the Bible by taking out all the sincerely good ideas and dumping all the crappy ones. A bit like the Jefferson Bible, but I mean actually rewriting it from a modern perspective. Maybe the KJV or Catholic bible can be included as 'Exhibit A', the puzzle itself, the implement of deception itself.
Wouldn't that be great? The Gospel of Satan could be written like a courtroom drama! Hahaha! Satan of course would be the prosecutor. But some savvy young lawyer demands that Satan be put on the witness stand. Oh man, I see a movie script!
Oh yeah, man, it could have all sorts of great surprise revelations, like when the defense attorney, who naturally is defending an atheist, demands to know who the authors of the law are, and he discovers, and reveals dramatically in a key scene, that Satan was behind it. Of course, this would be near the beginning of the story, and then Satan's testimony would begin, and that would be the meat of the story.
Satan: "According to God's law, you are guilty of sin!"
Defense: "Objection! The prosecution has not entered this so-called 'God's law' into evidence."
Etc. Etc.
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id really like to hear a theists answer to this. how is it that jesus dying makes our sins gone and everything else? i mean, its f'ing god, he can do it without killing his son.
I think the significance of God sending his only son to die, is so that we humans are able to understand God's actions. Wasn't Jesus suppose to be 100% God and 100% human? This is so humans could relate to the suffering Jesus went through, and to understand the Love that God has for us.
Its funny that this topic of Satan writing the Bible, or creating religions keeps coming up. I actually had a dream, where God told me that as an Atheist I was doing the correct thing by not following him, because Satan had created all the religions and sacred texts to tempt man. I just find it interesting that so many people have had this thought.
yes but that has nothing to do with changing laws. as i said, he could do that without his son dying.
but it does. Its the affect that Jesus had on us humans. Do you think Christianity would be as big as it is, if God just said "ok now there is no more sin." Having the story of Jesus suffering gives us something to relate too, and something to work towards.
exactly. christianity wouldnt be as big without these mythological stories. but it would be more logical for god to do that, he doesnt need to make people suffer.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't both jesus and satan reffered to as the morning star in the bible? Kinda weird for them to both have the same nickname.
Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine
yes it would be more logical for God. But as God is not real, and humans created the Bible, and the stories in it, it is much more effective that the Story of Jesus was told in the way it was.
ah, i mistook you for a theist for a while there. yes i would agree then, alot of the stories in the bible are effective, yet improbable and illogical.