And then there was shit

digitalbeachbum
atheistRational VIP!
digitalbeachbum's picture
Posts: 4895
Joined: 2007-10-15
User is offlineOffline
And then there was shit

 I know you have heard this before, but just reading it gives me the fucking laughs.

I was on Kickstarter just running around looking at all the dumb fucks asking for money for making bacon, wanting to setup a gaming cafe or wanting a new computer so they could setup some streaming channel on YouTube. Anyway, I ran across this guy:

 

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/233930857/average-joe-atheist?ref=discovery

Apparently he's trying to write a book. By the looks of it he ain't going to make it, but his blog is fucking funny.

http://atheist-biblestudy.blogspot.com/2012/09/noahs-ark-was-full-of-shit-animal-shit.html

I love talking about this subject with my family when they gave my baby daughter a puppet boat with Noah and some animals. I joked that there was a lot more animals in the boat than just four, then I said "and a lot more shit and piss too".

My family members got all uptight about it and I said, "Really? Didn't you think about it?" To which they responded, Noah had help. Yeah, right.

By his conservative estimates, 4 tons of shit was produced every day. Not including piss. Then you need to consider the amount of food must be stored some where?

lol. Fucking christians. What a bunch of moroons.


Brian37
atheistSuperfan
Brian37's picture
Posts: 16422
Joined: 2006-02-14
User is offlineOffline
 How did the animals from

 How did the animals from other continants get to the ark, how did Noah handle dangerous animals and poisonous animals. And all they have for logic is "POOF".

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog


digitalbeachbum
atheistRational VIP!
digitalbeachbum's picture
Posts: 4895
Joined: 2007-10-15
User is offlineOffline
Brian37 wrote:  How did the

Brian37 wrote:

 How did the animals from other CONTINENTS get to the ark, how did Noah handle dangerous animals and poisonous animals. And all they have for logic is "POOF".

I've been told several different stories by a variety of christians.

1 - That god sent him all the animals

2 - That all the animals were tamed by god

3 - That after the floods the animals went out and multiplied becoming the species that they are today.

I just want to slap the fuck out of people when the tell me Noah's ark was real, but that isn't a concern because talking about all the poop and piss is just plain funnier. 

The guy on that other page was being gentle. He estimated four tons of poop but in reality there was more like sixteen tons of poop each day.

Considering that it took me three days, nine hours, to move five tons of concerete fines, it would have taken them roughly thirty five man hours to move the shit produced each day.

Plus they would need to clean the piss produced by the animals which would require water to be drawn from the ocean then sweeping the floor, then feeding them food, then keeping them from eating each other, then... oh fuck it.

The story is just fucking bullshit. It never fucking happened and the idiots who believe it aren't worth my time.

You know what is fucking easier to believe?

God wanted to punish the humans who were bad, so god moved them all to hell in a blink of the eye so that they could be punished for eternity.

No need for a flood. No need for the ark. No bullshit. God just blinked and they were moved to a pit of burning lava.

 


iwbiek
atheistSuperfan
iwbiek's picture
Posts: 4298
Joined: 2008-03-23
User is offlineOffline
also it's important to

also it's important to remember that the typical creationist pre-flood geography portrays an earth with a single supercontinent that is more or less perfectly flat (no mountains, etc.--those were thrown up when the "fountains of the deep" burst open). according to the genesis account of the garden of eden, there were rivers, but there would have been no oceans or mountain ranges to cross.

"I have never felt comfortable around people who talk about their feelings for Jesus, or any other deity for that matter, because they are usually none too bright. . . . Or maybe 'stupid' is a better way of saying it; but I have never seen much point in getting heavy with either stupid people or Jesus freaks, just as long as they don't bother me. In a world as weird and cruel as this one we have made for ourselves, I figure anybody who can find peace and personal happiness without ripping off somebody else deserves to be left alone. They will not inherit the earth, but then neither will I. . . . And I have learned to live, as it were, with the idea that I will never find peace and happiness, either. But as long as I know there's a pretty good chance I can get my hands on either one of them every once in a while, I do the best I can between high spots."
--Hunter S. Thompson


digitalbeachbum
atheistRational VIP!
digitalbeachbum's picture
Posts: 4895
Joined: 2007-10-15
User is offlineOffline
iwbiek wrote:also it's

iwbiek wrote:
also it's important to remember that the typical creationist pre-flood geography portrays an earth with a single supercontinent that is more or less perfectly flat (no mountains, etc.--those were thrown up when the "fountains of the deep" burst open). according to the genesis account of the garden of eden, there were rivers, but there would have been no oceans or mountain ranges to cross.

My daughter was asking about it recently and I told her it was a fairytale and that people made it up a long time ago in an attempt to explain the unknown.

Still can't believe that christians believe in the crap in the bible but won't believe in santa