Howdy

Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Howdy

Howdy. My name's Billy Bob. I'm an all American, ex-military, Bible believin' Baptist. I believe every single word of the Bible without exception. I'm not one of those sissy Christians who believe only the parts that sound pretty. I only wear wholecloth. I believe the law should provide for the stoning of disobedient children. I believe Jesus is my Savior.

I look forward to teachin' you atheists a thing or two about there bein' a God. Foremost, I want you all to understand that pretending there's no God won't justify you havin' anal sex or worshipping false idols. God knows He's real and so should you.

In case any of you come at me with the argument, "how do you know your religion is the right one. There's so many religions!" I'll just have you know right up front that the KJV1611 only endorses True Christianity, and that's the only religion that they teach at my church.

I defy you all to prove to me that the Bible is not the inerrant Word of God, and that you are not all damned.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
v4ultingbassist wrote:But

v4ultingbassist wrote:

But weren't you touting there is no such thing as a non-homer atheist?

Not exactly. I said "atheism is nothing more than an excuse for men to have anal sex with one another". What that means exactly is that the original reason atheism was created was as an excuse for man on man gay action. Since then it has infected the popular culture. The first atheists were ancient greeks, and they were notorious faggots.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


cj
atheistRational VIP!
cj's picture
Posts: 3330
Joined: 2007-01-05
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

v4ultingbassist wrote:

But weren't you touting there is no such thing as a non-homer atheist?

Not exactly. I said "atheism is nothing more than an excuse for men to have anal sex with one another". What that means exactly is that the original reason atheism was created was as an excuse for man on man gay action. Since then it has infected the popular culture. The first atheists were ancient greeks, and they were notorious faggots.

 

If two atheist women are together, do they have anal sex?  Do they use "marital aids"?  Do they have a man to assist them?  I wouldn't know, I've never had another atheist woman ask me for sex.  But then, I've never had a christian woman ask me for sex, either.

Ah, I forgot.  You don't care about girls, not even your momma who was also a girl at one point.  Can you explain to me how you (and other men like you) are going to have boy children without a girl-woman involved?

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
cj wrote:If two atheist

cj wrote:

If two atheist women are together, do they have anal sex?  Do they use "marital aids"?  Do they have a man to assist them?  I wouldn't know, I've never had another atheist woman ask me for sex.  But then, I've never had a christian woman ask me for sex, either.

Ah, I forgot.  You don't care about girls, not even your momma who was also a girl at one point.  Can you explain to me how you (and other men like you) are going to have boy children without a girl-woman involved?

I don't worry too much about the details of what goes on between atheist bulldykes. But I do know that they will go to any length to mock God, whether that means getting a man to assist them or an especially trained quadraped. As for "marital aids", I presume that's the sort of AIDS you give to your spouse when you've been cheating on them with a member of the same sex, though I'm not a doctor and can't tell you much else about that.

I care very much about some women, such as my wife Ethel. I care about her enough to discipline her regularly and lecture her about Jesus when she starts acting like a woman. We have three male children together. She has also borne me three daughters, but I put those up for adoption. All I need is three more broads bleeding and leaking milk all over the place.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


jcgadfly
Superfan
Posts: 6791
Joined: 2006-07-18
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:cj

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

cj wrote:

If two atheist women are together, do they have anal sex?  Do they use "marital aids"?  Do they have a man to assist them?  I wouldn't know, I've never had another atheist woman ask me for sex.  But then, I've never had a christian woman ask me for sex, either.

Ah, I forgot.  You don't care about girls, not even your momma who was also a girl at one point.  Can you explain to me how you (and other men like you) are going to have boy children without a girl-woman involved?

I don't worry too much about the details of what goes on between atheist bulldykes. But I do know that they will go to any length to mock God, whether that means getting a man to assist them or an especially trained quadraped. As for "marital aids", I presume that's the sort of AIDS you give to your spouse when you've been cheating on them with a member of the same sex, though I'm not a doctor and can't tell you much else about that.

I care very much about some women, such as my wife Ethel. I care about her enough to discipline her regularly and lecture her about Jesus when she starts acting like a woman. We have three male children together. She has also borne me three daughters, but I put those up for adoption. All I need is three more broads bleeding and leaking milk all over the place.

Too busy watching and wanking?

"I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions."
— George Carlin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
jcgadfly wrote:wanking?

jcgadfly wrote:

wanking?

Sorry, I only speak American.


cj
atheistRational VIP!
cj's picture
Posts: 3330
Joined: 2007-01-05
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:I

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

I don't worry too much about the details of what goes on between atheist bulldykes. But I do know that they will go to any length to mock God, whether that means getting a man to assist them or an especially trained quadraped. As for "marital aids", I presume that's the sort of AIDS you give to your spouse when you've been cheating on them with a member of the same sex, though I'm not a doctor and can't tell you much else about that.

I care very much about some women, such as my wife Ethel. I care about her enough to discipline her regularly and lecture her about Jesus when she starts acting like a woman. We have three male children together. She has also borne me three daughters, but I put those up for adoption. All I need is three more broads bleeding and leaking milk all over the place.

 

You know, it is just as well.  The little girls can grow up loved, healthy and happy without worrying about daddy raping or beating them.  If I were your wife, I'd have done anything to get my daughters away from you.  Ethel has all my pity.

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
cj wrote:You know, it is

cj wrote:

You know, it is just as well.  The little girls can grow up loved, healthy and happy without worrying about daddy raping or beating them.  If I were your wife, I'd have done anything to get my daughters away from you.  Ethel has all my pity.

Seeing as I am a righteous man of God, I would probably never rape anybody. God only sanctions rape when it is absolutely necessary, such as here in the Book of Numbers: 

Numbers 31:18 (King James Version)

  18But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.

 

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


jcgadfly
Superfan
Posts: 6791
Joined: 2006-07-18
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

jcgadfly wrote:

wanking?

Sorry, I only speak American.

And you used the word arse?

"I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions."
— George Carlin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
That is just one of the side

That is just one of the side effects of living in a multi-cultural society: occasionally I say things that make no sense. I try to isolate myself and my family from the world, but between internet and driving into town for groceries, they've got me talking like some mick eurotrash! Gaah!

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Atheistextremist
atheist
Atheistextremist's picture
Posts: 5133
Joined: 2009-09-17
User is offlineOffline
Snicker

 

What sort of truck do you drive into town, billy? And how would you describe the town? What are the people like? Are you home schooling your sons into warriors for jesus?

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


Teralek
Theist
Teralek's picture
Posts: 619
Joined: 2010-07-15
User is offlineOffline
Whoa

Welcome Billy Bob

Man this guy is a classic!!! I thought these things only appeared in the American movies! Even his name fits him as a glove!!

______________________________________________________________
"I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness"

"All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force... We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter." (Max Planck)

"the existence of mind in some organism on some planet in the universe is surely a fact of fundamental significance. Through conscious beings the universe has generated self-awareness. This can be no trivial detail, no minor byproduct of mindless, purposeless forces. We are truly meant to be here." Paul Davies


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
jcgadfly wrote:And you used

jcgadfly wrote:

And you used the word arse?

I have taken up using that word in place of its foul alternative.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Atheistextremist wrote:What

Atheistextremist wrote:

What sort of truck do you drive into town, billy? And how would you describe the town? What are the people like? Are you home schooling your sons into warriors for jesus?

If there's one thing I know through common sense it's that you don't tell an atheist with a mask who you met over the internet about your home town or what kind of truck you operate. If you do you're just asking to be the victim of some weird crime.

I will tell you that I am indeed home schooling my three sons to be True Christian Warriors for Christ. My wife Ethel is mostly in charge of that though. Last I heard she was teaching them about WWII, which was instigated by German Jews and resulted in the destruction of their own country. It's important that you learn history otherwise you're bound to repeat it.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

Atheistextremist wrote:

What sort of truck do you drive into town, billy? And how would you describe the town? What are the people like? Are you home schooling your sons into warriors for jesus?

If there's one thing I know through common sense it's that you don't tell an atheist with a mask who you met over the internet about your home town or what kind of truck you operate. If you do you're just asking to be the victim of some weird crime.

 

lol another good one.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Considering you so

Considering you so eloquently derailed the multiple religions arument (lol), how do you rationalize where you were born? For example had you been born in Pakistan what religion would you be adhering to today?

I'm going to take a guess and say that "god only puts those he knows will be heathens in pakistan?"

 Was I close? I hope not because I already have a retort prepared for that one.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:Considering

robj101 wrote:

Considering you so eloquently derailed the multiple religions arument (lol), how do you rationalize where you were born? For example had you been born in Pakistan what religion would you be adhering to today?

I'm going to take a guess and say that "god only puts those he knows will be heathens in pakistan?"

 Was I close? I hope not because I already have a retort prepared for that one.

If I were born in Pakistan, that would be unfortunate indeed, as most everyone if not absolutely everyone in Pakistan, is Hellbound.

Isaiah 45:7 (King James Version)

 7I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.

While most God fearing Americans could do without Pakistan and its moon worshipping banditry, God has created Pakistan and all of its terrorist inhabitants. We just have to accept that and continue worshipping Jesus.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
I'm part redneck by default

I'm part redneck by default having been born in and residing in Texas (though I have lived in a few other states and ventured overseas for a time), so I know the gears are grinding right now with a kind of dull hum.

I don't however brag about it and indeed I can usually fool the public on this particular matter through the written word /cough, though my accent is a terrible dead giveaway.

Actually come to think of it I have been told I sound like Sam Elliot  

Bragging about being a redneck is not exactly awesome imo.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

Considering you so eloquently derailed the multiple religions arument (lol), how do you rationalize where you were born? For example had you been born in Pakistan what religion would you be adhering to today?

I'm going to take a guess and say that "god only puts those he knows will be heathens in pakistan?"

 Was I close? I hope not because I already have a retort prepared for that one.

If I were born in Pakistan, that would be unfortunate indeed, as most everyone if not absolutely everyone in Pakistan, is Hellbound.

Isaiah 45:7 (King James Version)

 7I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.

While most God fearing Americans could do without Pakistan and its moon worshipping banditry, God has created Pakistan and all of its terrorist inhabitants. We just have to accept that and continue worshipping Jesus.

That verse doesn't mention pakistan or any other land in particular. You could do better, in fact I can think of a better one right now and I'm no bible scholar.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:That verse

robj101 wrote:

That verse doesn't mention pakistan or any other land in particular. You could do better, in fact I can think of a better one right now and I'm no bible scholar.

Okay, hit me.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
  Leviticus 26:33 And I

 

 Leviticus 26:33

And I will scatter you among the heathen, and will draw out a sword after you: and your land shall be desolate, and your cities waste.

 

 

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


iwbiek
atheistSuperfan
iwbiek's picture
Posts: 4198
Joined: 2008-03-23
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:Actually come

robj101 wrote:

Actually come to think of it I have been told I sound like Sam Elliot  

 

that...is...awesome!

"I have never felt comfortable around people who talk about their feelings for Jesus, or any other deity for that matter, because they are usually none too bright. . . . Or maybe 'stupid' is a better way of saying it; but I have never seen much point in getting heavy with either stupid people or Jesus freaks, just as long as they don't bother me. In a world as weird and cruel as this one we have made for ourselves, I figure anybody who can find peace and personal happiness without ripping off somebody else deserves to be left alone. They will not inherit the earth, but then neither will I. . . . And I have learned to live, as it were, with the idea that I will never find peace and happiness, either. But as long as I know there's a pretty good chance I can get my hands on either one of them every once in a while, I do the best I can between high spots."
--Hunter S. Thompson


ProzacDeathWish
atheist
ProzacDeathWish's picture
Posts: 4127
Joined: 2007-12-02
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

 Will you find it entertaining in Hell with an arse full of satan's sizzling .....

    "Arse" ?    Yeah, you're an all American.   I bet you also say "whilst" instead of while. 

Patrick is an edgy edgelord.


Answers in Gene...
High Level Donor
Answers in Gene Simmons's picture
Posts: 4214
Joined: 2008-11-11
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

OK, no rattle snakes in church.  Not because you can (you have already admitted that you totally can), rather because you prefer to make your nonsense ramblings sound like actual words (no speaking in tongues).  Despite the fact that it was you who quoted Mark 16:17 and went on to state that the speaking in tongues thing is totally fine by you.

  Now you're trying to make it sound like I approve of the demon worship that those pentecostal folks engage in. The pentecostals have twisted God's Word to suit their own twisted fantasies whereby they can indulge in poison drinking and snake fondling. I have already explained how they are scripturally incorrect and see no further reason to go on redeeming myself. I am a Baptist! And that is that!

 

Nah, I am not trying to do that.  Yet you did explicitly say that you can handle snakes.

 

How about Genesis 1:29, 30

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote: Leviticus

robj101 wrote:

 Leviticus 26:33

And I will scatter you among the heathen, and will draw out a sword after you: and your land shall be desolate, and your cities waste.

You are right at least in saying that this is an excellent piece of scripture. However, I cannot agree that it is better than any other particular selection, as all of His Word is infallible.

2 Timothy 3:16 (King James Version)

 16All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

 

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

 Yet you did explicitly say that you can handle snakes.

 

Matthew 19:26 (King James Version)

 26But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

How about Genesis 1:29, 30

Genesis 1:29-30 (King James Version)

 29And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.

 30And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so.

Naturally, since I believe the Bible in its entirety, I believe these verses as well.

 

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Answers in Gene...
High Level Donor
Answers in Gene Simmons's picture
Posts: 4214
Joined: 2008-11-11
User is offlineOffline
So, is your avatar a pic of

So, is your avatar a pic of you chopping off some prime tree steak to feed you and your boys dinner?

 

Do you prefer your pine rare/medium/well done?

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


Teralek
Theist
Teralek's picture
Posts: 619
Joined: 2010-07-15
User is offlineOffline
Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

So, is your avatar a pic of you chopping off some prime tree steak to feed you and your boys dinner?

 

Do you prefer your pine rare/medium/well done?

______________________________________________________________
"I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness"

"All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force... We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter." (Max Planck)

"the existence of mind in some organism on some planet in the universe is surely a fact of fundamental significance. Through conscious beings the universe has generated self-awareness. This can be no trivial detail, no minor byproduct of mindless, purposeless forces. We are truly meant to be here." Paul Davies


Medievalguy
Medievalguy's picture
Posts: 281
Joined: 2007-03-01
User is offlineOffline
 Billy, you say you are a

 Billy, you say you are a man of god. The bible says that signs will accompany those who are truly saved. In order for me to convert, I need to see you pass the test of proof laid out in the bible. Mark 16:18 clearly states that poison will not harm a believer. Don't try to argue out of this, your god says it right there, black and white. Now, go get a jug of bleach and drink it. Every. last. drop. In fact, do it on video so we can all see the miracle, perhaps you'll save more people that way.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Medievalguy wrote: Billy,

Medievalguy wrote:

 Billy, you say you are a man of god. The bible says that signs will accompany those who are truly saved. In order for me to convert, I need to see you pass the test of proof laid out in the bible. Mark 16:18 clearly states that poison will not harm a believer. Don't try to argue out of this, your god says it right there, black and white. Now, go get a jug of bleach and drink it. Every. last. drop. In fact, do it on video so we can all see the miracle, perhaps you'll save more people that way.

I refer you to post #13 in this same thread. I have already cited scripture stating that it is sinful to tempt the Lord God by fondling snakes or drinking poison like a Hellbound pentecostal.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

So, is your avatar a pic of you chopping off some prime tree steak to feed you and your boys dinner?

 

Do you prefer your pine rare/medium/well done?

No, that is me engaged in a lumberjack competition.

Edit: I have never tried pine, but maybe I will since God said it was okay. It isn't mandatory though, you realize.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


cj
atheistRational VIP!
cj's picture
Posts: 3330
Joined: 2007-01-05
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:No,

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

No, that is me engaged in a lumberjack competition.

Edit: I have never tried pine, but maybe I will since God said it was okay. It isn't mandatory though, you realize.

 

I used to know an idiot who juggled chain saws at lumberjack competitions.  It was his profession until he was elected county commissioner. 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

"If death isn't sweet oblivion, I will be severely disappointed" - Ruth M.


Medievalguy
Medievalguy's picture
Posts: 281
Joined: 2007-03-01
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins wrote: I

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

 I refer you to post #13 in this same thread. I have already cited scripture stating that it is sinful to tempt the Lord God by fondling snakes or drinking poison like a Hellbound pentecostal.

 

How can it be sinful if he explains that it is a sign of true faith? It's not sinful if you're saved. You wouldn't be "tempting" god at all. You know you're saved and so does he, and you're just showing other people the power he has as he commanded, it's not sinful at all. I have a sneak suspicion you have a doubting heart....


Teralek
Theist
Teralek's picture
Posts: 619
Joined: 2010-07-15
User is offlineOffline
mocking

This guy cant be real!! Cmon! "Discipline his wife"?!?! "Giving daughters for adoption"??!!

What is this?! The middle ages??!

He's a stereotype. Are there many people like that in the USA?! 

He used the word arse he slipped 

He's mocking you!

______________________________________________________________
"I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness"

"All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force... We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter." (Max Planck)

"the existence of mind in some organism on some planet in the universe is surely a fact of fundamental significance. Through conscious beings the universe has generated self-awareness. This can be no trivial detail, no minor byproduct of mindless, purposeless forces. We are truly meant to be here." Paul Davies


Teralek
Theist
Teralek's picture
Posts: 619
Joined: 2010-07-15
User is offlineOffline
PROOF

Teralek wrote:

This guy cant be real!! Cmon! "Discipline his wife"?!?! "Giving daughters for adoption"??!!

What is this?! The middle ages??!

He's a stereotype. Are there many people like that in the USA?! 

He used the word arse he slipped 

He's mocking you!

 

See!!! See!!!! I Told you!!! mocking!!! I found proof!!!!

http://sports.espn.go.com/outdoors/timbersports/news/story?id=3322480

______________________________________________________________
"I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness"

"All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force... We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter." (Max Planck)

"the existence of mind in some organism on some planet in the universe is surely a fact of fundamental significance. Through conscious beings the universe has generated self-awareness. This can be no trivial detail, no minor byproduct of mindless, purposeless forces. We are truly meant to be here." Paul Davies


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

 Leviticus 26:33

And I will scatter you among the heathen, and will draw out a sword after you: and your land shall be desolate, and your cities waste.

You are right at least in saying that this is an excellent piece of scripture. However, I cannot agree that it is better than any other particular selection, as all of His Word is infallible.

2 Timothy 3:16 (King James Version)

 16All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

 

I mentioned I could quote a more situationally appropriate bit of "scripture". I didn't just say it was a "better" piece of scripture. You seem to be spewing scripture out your "arse" so I would assume you know more than myself about the bible, poe or not.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Teralek wrote:Teralek

Teralek wrote:

Teralek wrote:

This guy cant be real!! Cmon! "Discipline his wife"?!?! "Giving daughters for adoption"??!!

What is this?! The middle ages??!

He's a stereotype. Are there many people like that in the USA?! 

He used the word arse he slipped 

He's mocking you!

 

See!!! See!!!! I Told you!!! mocking!!! I found proof!!!!

http://sports.espn.go.com/outdoors/timbersports/news/story?id=3322480

Nice find. A personal hero of his no doubt /snicker.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Teralek wrote:See!!! See!!!!

Teralek wrote:

See!!! See!!!! I Told you!!! mocking!!! I found proof!!!!

http://sports.espn.go.com/outdoors/timbersports/news/story?id=3322480

I don't know what you're spazzing out about. You found my picture. So what? I told you it was at a lumberjack competition.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:I mentioned I

robj101 wrote:

I mentioned I could quote a more situationally appropriate bit of "scripture". I didn't just say it was a "better" piece of scripture. You seem to be spewing scripture out your "arse" so I would assume you know more than myself about the bible, poe or not.

Explain how that is situationally appropriate.

Edit: Thank you for complementing my Biblical knowledge. That went straight to my head.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Reread #68 and then tell me

Reread #68 and then tell me mine is not a more appropriate quote, you seem to have lost track.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Medievalguy wrote:How can it

Medievalguy wrote:

How can it be sinful if he explains that it is a sign of true faith? It's not sinful if you're saved. You wouldn't be "tempting" god at all. You know you're saved and so does he, and you're just showing other people the power he has as he commanded, it's not sinful at all. I have a sneak suspicion you have a doubting heart....

Look, maybe there was a day when I would have drank a bottle of bleach for the Lord and felt okay about it, but the pentecostals have ruined it for everybody with their pew jumping, snake worshipping, monkeying around. They act like a bunch of darwinists flinging feces at eachother and ad-libbing jibberish. I would never allow myself to be mistaken for a pentecostal. I have invested too much in my Heavenly Salvation to screw it all up now.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:Reread #68 and

robj101 wrote:

Reread #68 and then tell me mine is not a more appropriate quote, you seem to have lost track.

I just think that you are trying too hard to "interpret" the scripture when you should just let it say what it says. Stop having sex with other men and punching pregnant women in the stomach for a day to let the atheist fog clear out of your head. Then reread the scripture and I think you will agree with me.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

Reread #68 and then tell me mine is not a more appropriate quote, you seem to have lost track.

I just think that you are trying too hard to "interpret" the scripture when you should just let it say what it says. Stop having sex with other men and punching pregnant women in the stomach for a day to let the atheist fog clear out of your head. Then reread the scripture and I think you will agree with me.

It's fine if you prefer to generalize. Punching pregnant women while having anal sex is so relaxing though, makes you clear headed. To go without would be akin to forcing a meth head to stop for a day.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote:Billy Bob

robj101 wrote:

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

Reread #68 and then tell me mine is not a more appropriate quote, you seem to have lost track.

I just think that you are trying too hard to "interpret" the scripture when you should just let it say what it says. Stop having sex with other men and punching pregnant women in the stomach for a day to let the atheist fog clear out of your head. Then reread the scripture and I think you will agree with me.

It's fine if you prefer to generalize. Punching pregnant women while having anal sex is so relaxing though, makes you clear headed. To go without would be akin to forcing a meth head to stop for a day.

Your illusion of clarity is just the very beguilement of satan's dark power. You must choose between sin and Salvation. Wipe the AIDS infested man seed from your lips and use them to pray for mercy.  

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


ex-minister
atheistHigh Level Moderator
ex-minister's picture
Posts: 1710
Joined: 2010-01-29
User is offlineOffline
Only speak American?

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

jcgadfly wrote:

wanking?

Sorry, I only speak American.

God's language tis KJV1611.  Why doth ye not speaketh in Jesus' tongue?

Religion Kills !!!

Numbers 31:17-18 - Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man.

http://jesus-needs-money.blogspot.com/


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

Reread #68 and then tell me mine is not a more appropriate quote, you seem to have lost track.

I just think that you are trying too hard to "interpret" the scripture when you should just let it say what it says. Stop having sex with other men and punching pregnant women in the stomach for a day to let the atheist fog clear out of your head. Then reread the scripture and I think you will agree with me.

It's fine if you prefer to generalize. Punching pregnant women while having anal sex is so relaxing though, makes you clear headed. To go without would be akin to forcing a meth head to stop for a day.

Your illusion of clarity is just the very beguilement of satan's dark power. You must choose between sin and Salvation. Wipe the AIDS infested man seed from your lips and use them to pray for mercy.  

I'll play along a litle more. Has your Jesus approved your own vile tongue and judgemental ways?

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Answers in Gene...
High Level Donor
Answers in Gene Simmons's picture
Posts: 4214
Joined: 2008-11-11
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:  

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

 

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:
Yet you did explicitly say that you can handle snakes.

 

Matthew 19:26 (King James Version)

 

26But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

 

OK, I did not have time to get to this one yesterday morning. Even so, I always love it when theists take a single line from scripture and quote it apart from the context where it occurs to prove something which is fully different.

 

Shall we have a read at the whole relevant passage and see what it really means? Yes, lets do that:

 

Quote:
16And, behold, one came and said unto him, Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?

 17And he said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God: but if thou wilt enter into life, keep the commandments.

 18He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said, Thou shalt do no murder, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness,

 19Honour thy father and thy mother: and, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

 20The young man saith unto him, All these things have I kept from my youth up: what lack I yet?

 21Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.

 22But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions.

 23Then said Jesus unto his disciples, Verily I say unto you, That a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven.

 24And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

 25When his disciples heard it, they were exceedingly amazed, saying, Who then can be saved?

 26But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

 27Then answered Peter and said unto him, Behold, we have forsaken all, and followed thee; what shall we have therefore?

 28And Jesus said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That ye which have followed me, in the regeneration when the Son of man shall sit in the throne of his glory, ye also shall sit upon twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.

 29And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life.

 

OK, so your answer to the whole taking snakes to church thing is to quote a single line out of context. When that context is restored, we find out that it is about so much more than that. It has a great deal to do with maintaining a state of poverty as somehow holy. And how well do you hold up?

 

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:
I believe that owning a lot of guns is extremely important for any man, even if he is from some Godless country like Europe or Cambodia. Without guns how will you protect your home from thieving minorities?

 

So you have guns. Lots of guns. Guns are stuff and you have lots of them. Your main stated reason is to keep poor people from getting near to your other stuff. So I guess that you are more like the rich guy who has to give it all to poor people to get to heaven than to the poor people that JC said everyone really ought to be like.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
robj101 wrote: Has your

robj101 wrote:

 Has your Jesus approved your own vile tongue and judgemental ways?

Of course. I live my life by every word of the Bible.

Psalm 37:30 (King James Version)

 30The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

 My tongue is not vile. It says, "I love the Lord" and sings His praises.

I hope I didn't hurt your feelings too bad with the "AIDS infested man seed" bit.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


Billy Bob Jenkins
Theist
Billy Bob Jenkins's picture
Posts: 184
Joined: 2010-07-14
User is offlineOffline
Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

OK, I did not have time to get to this one yesterday morning. Even so, I always love it when theists take a single line from scripture and quote it apart from the context where it occurs to prove something which is fully different.

OK, so your answer to the whole taking snakes to church thing is to quote a single line out of context. When that context is restored, we find out that it is about so much more than that. It has a great deal to do with maintaining a state of poverty as somehow holy. And how well do you hold up?

So you have guns. Lots of guns. Guns are stuff and you have lots of them. Your main stated reason is to keep poor people from getting near to your other stuff. So I guess that you are more like the rich guy who has to give it all to poor people to get to heaven than to the poor people that JC said everyone really ought to be like.

 

I just believe in property rights, as did Jesus Christ our Lord. I am a Republican and I believe in America and its Free Market.

Matthew 15:18-19 (King James Version)

 18But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man.

 19For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:

I am not rich. I am a lumberjack. Though periodically I can go on a gun shopping spree when I win at competitive lumberjack events. I tithe most of that money to my church.

The Truest Christian these atheists will ever meet. I worship the only Lord at the Church with the Truest Christians: Landover Baptist.


robj101
atheist
robj101's picture
Posts: 2481
Joined: 2010-02-20
User is offlineOffline
Billy Bob Jenkins

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

 Has your Jesus approved your own vile tongue and judgemental ways?

Of course. I live my life by every word of the Bible.

Psalm 37:30 (King James Version)

 30The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

 My tongue is not vile. It says, "I love the Lord" and sings His praises.

I hope I didn't hurt your feelings too bad with the "AIDS infested man seed" bit.

 You sir are a joy to the world and set a standard all fundamentalist christians should weigh themselves against.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


Jeffrick
High Level DonorRational VIP!SuperfanGold Member
Jeffrick's picture
Posts: 2446
Joined: 2008-03-25
User is offlineOffline
Guess what y'all

robj101 wrote:

Billy Bob Jenkins wrote:

robj101 wrote:

 Has your Jesus approved your own vile tongue and judgemental ways?

Of course. I live my life by every word of the Bible.

Psalm 37:30 (King James Version)

 30The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

 My tongue is not vile. It says, "I love the Lord" and sings His praises.

I hope I didn't hurt your feelings too bad with the "AIDS infested man seed" bit.

 You sir are a joy to the world and set a standard all fundamentalist christians should weigh themselves against.

 

 

             Turns out ole'  Billy Bob is a memeber of   Landover  Baptist.org

"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."

VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"

If man was formed from dirt, why is there still dirt?