Stupidest things god said.

Atheistextremist
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Stupidest things god said.

 

"Yes, I will punish those who participate in pagan worship ceremonies...on that day," says the LORD, "a cry of alarm will come from the Fish Gate and echo throughout the newer Mishneh section of the city. And a great crashing sound will come from the surrounding hills.  Wail in sorrow, all you who live in the market area, for all who buy and sell there will die."

God - Zephaniah, 1-8.

 

 

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Ooooh, fun. Love your kids anyone? Mmmm, tasty.

 

"Because of your detestable idols, I will punish you more severely than I have punished anyone before or ever will again.  Parents will eat their own children, and children will eat their parents."  God - Ezekiel 5:7-10

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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God is love....

 

"When the LORD your God hands it over to you, kill every man in the town.  But you may keep for yourselves all the women, children, livestock, and other plunder. You may enjoy the spoils of your enemies that the LORD your God has given you.  But these instructions apply only to distant towns, not to the towns nearby. As for the towns of the nations the LORD your God is giving you as a special possession, destroy every living thing in them. You must completely destroy the Hittites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites." God Deuteronomy 20:10-18

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Gives one the image of a

Gives one the image of a spoiled little brat playing in the sandbox using a magnifying glass in the hot summer sun frying the ants.

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I'm sure they interpret

I'm sure they interpret these some other way because the word of god is so perfect.

The words of two people I know, who don't know each other "I interpret the bible how I want too."

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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This is why I never invite

This is why I never invite this asshole to any of our parties... and he never brings beer...


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One for the jillaroos...

 

"But unto you that fear my name shall the Sun of righteousness arise with healing in his wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall."  God - Malachi 4:2

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Atheistextremist wrote: " 

Atheistextremist wrote:

 

"  Parents will eat their own children, and children will eat their parents."  God - Ezekiel 5:7-10

  Almost sounds like you're describing a scene from a George Romero movie...

Patrick is an edgy edgelord.


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Just when I thought I had a

Just when I thought I had a handle on just how stupid the Bible could be, you dig these up...

How many believers even know about all these crazy things, let alone are able to 'explain' them, other than with shit like:

"you are quoting it out of context";

"you need to accept Jesus (or God) into your heart before you will properly understand the scriptures";

"those passages no longer apply, since Jesus has fulfilled the OT"; This 'fulfilled' thing is the latest meme I have noticed, they seem to apply it to all sorts of things which I can't make sense of.

 

 

Favorite oxymorons: Gospel Truth, Rational Supernaturalist, Business Ethics, Christian Morality

"Theology is now little more than a branch of human ignorance. Indeed, it is ignorance with wings." - Sam Harris

The path to Truth lies via careful study of reality, not the dreams of our fallible minds - me

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Meh. "Say to the Israelites:

Meh.

"Say to the Israelites: "A woman who becomes pregnant and gives birth to a son will be cermonially unclean for seven days, just as she is unclean during her monthly period. On the eighth day the boy is to be circumcised. Then the woman must wait thirty-three days to be purified from her bleeding. She must not touch anything sacred or go to the sanctuary until the days of her purification are over. If she gives birth to a daughter, for two weeks the woman will be unclean, as during her period. Then she must wait sixty-six days to be purified from her bleeding."" Leviticus 12:2-5

"If your very own brother, or your son or daughter, or the wife you love, or your closest friend secretly entices you, saying, "Let us go and worship other gods" (gods that neither you nor your fathers have known, gods of the peoples around you, whether near or far, from one end of the land to the other), do not yield to him or listen to him. Show him no pity. Do not spare him or shield him. You must certainly put him to death. Your hand must be the first in putting him to death, and then the hands of all the people. Stone him to death, because he tried to turn you away from the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery." Deuteronomy 13:6-10

"For all the earth shall be devoured with the fire of my jealousy." Zephaniah 3:8

"If a man beats his male or female slave with a rod and the slave dies as a direct result, he must be punished, but he is not to be punished if the slave gets up after a day or two, since the slave is his property." Exodus 21:20 

""Have you allowed all the women to live?" he asked them. They were the ones who followed Balaam's advice and were the means of turning the Israelites away from the Lord in what happened at Peor, so that a plague struck the Lord's people. Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man." Numbers 31:15-18 

"For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness."" 2 Thessalonians 2:11-12 

""The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard him say it."" Mark 11:12-14

Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare


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BobSpence1 wrote:"those

BobSpence1 wrote:

"those passages no longer apply, since Jesus has fulfilled the OT"; This 'fulfilled' thing is the latest meme I have noticed, they seem to apply it to all sorts of things which I can't make sense of. 

Lol. A lot of this kind of stuff is in the New Testament too, but the vast majority of Christians don't know about it because they've never read it, so it just makes them look even more ignorant about their own scripture.

I mean, jeez, this is in the New Testament.

"All who are under the yoke of slavery should consider their masters worthy of full respect, so that God's name and our teaching may not be slandered. Those who have believing masters are not to show less respect for them because they are brothers. Instead, they are to serve them even better, because those who benefit from their service are believers, and dear to them. These are the things you are to teach and urge on them." 1 Timothy 6:1-2

Wtf?

 

 

Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare


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Brian37 wrote:Gives one the

Brian37 wrote:

Gives one the image of a spoiled little brat playing in the sandbox using a magnifying glass in the hot summer sun frying the ants.

Hey! I resemble that remark!

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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BobSpence1 wrote:"those

BobSpence1 wrote:

"those passages no longer apply, since Jesus has fulfilled the OT"; This 'fulfilled' thing is the latest meme I have noticed, they seem to apply it to all sorts of things which I can't make sense of.

 

Gays like going to church as well... plus all the 'sane' xtians don't want me getting revenge (although vengeance will be mine anyways, one way or another, for simply being allowed to exist)

Quote:

"you need to accept Jesus (or God) into your heart before you will properly understand the scriptures";

Ah! Finally, after all these years, the bible finally makes sense to me!

I simply can't be bothered to give much of a shit, at all....

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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butterbattle wrote: ""The

butterbattle wrote:

 

""The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard him say it."" Mark 11:12-14

This is the all-knowing Son of God, so whacked out by too much time out in the desert he has no clue what season it is. But, I thought he knew everything, why did he even have to walk over to the fig tree to look for figs? Then of course he throws a temper tantrum and curses a poor fig tree that was doing only what it should.

____________________________________________________________
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"God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent, - it says so right here on the label. If you have a mind capable of believing all three of these divine attributes simultaneously, I have a wonderful bargain for you. No checks please. Cash and in small bills." - Robert A Heinlein.


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Oh man, where do I

Oh man, where do I begin.   Let's see what god said to woman... 

 

Genesis 3:16


3:16: To the woman he said, "I will greatly multiply your pain in childbirth. In pain you will bring forth children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."

 

Very nice!!! Cruel and sexist in one verse. 

 

Malacki 2:2-3


2:2: If you will not listen, and if you will not lay it to heart, to give glory to my name," says Yahweh of Hosts, "then will I send the curse on you, and I will curse your blessings. Indeed, I have cursed them already, because you do not lay it to heart.
 
2:3: Behold, I will rebuke your seed, and will spread dung on your faces, even the dung of your feasts; and you will be taken away with it. 

 

Apparently Yahweh would like to spread some poop on non-believers faces, and food perhaps.
 

 

Numbers 15:32-36


32: While the children of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man gathering sticks on the Sabbath day.
 
15:33: Those who found him gathering sticks brought him to Moses and Aaron, and to all the congregation.
 
15:34: They put him in custody, because it had not been declared what should be done to him.
 
15:35: Yahweh said to Moses, The man shall surely be put to death: all the congregation shall stone him with stones outside of the camp.
 
15:36: All the congregation brought him outside of the camp, and stoned him to death with stones; as Yahweh commanded Moses.

 

  Here Yahweh clearly commands this guy to be killed, for what, gathering some sticks on sunday.  WTF? Maybe he was cold or hungry and needed to make a fire.  What a joke, like decapitating someone for J-walking.

 

  This next one's not god talking specifically, it does say he does approve, but it's just funny as hell.

 

Leviticus 15:19-30


15:19: "'If a woman has a discharge, and her discharge in her flesh is blood, she shall be in her impurity seven days: and whoever touches her shall be unclean until the evening.
 
15:20: "'Everything that she lies on in her impurity shall be unclean. Everything also that she sits on shall be unclean.
 
15:21: Whoever touches her bed shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:22: Whoever touches anything that she sits on shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:23: If it is on the bed, or on anything whereon she sits, when he touches it, he shall be unclean until the evening.
 
15:24: "'If any man lies with her, and her monthly flow is on him, he shall be unclean seven days; and every bed whereon he lies shall be unclean.
 
15:25: "'If a woman has a discharge of her blood many days not in the time of her period, or if she has a discharge beyond the time of her period; all the days of the discharge of her uncleanness shall be as in the days of her period: she is unclean.
 
15:26: Every bed whereon she lies all the days of her discharge shall be to her as the bed of her period: and everything whereon she sits shall be unclean, as the uncleanness of her period.
 
15:27: Whoever touches these things shall be unclean, and shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:28: "'But if she is cleansed of her discharge, then she shall count to herself seven days, and after that she shall be clean.
 
15:29: On the eighth day she shall take two turtledoves, or two young pigeons, and bring them to the priest, to the door of the Tent of Meeting.
 
15:30: The priest shall offer the one for a sin offering, and the other for a burnt offering; and the priest shall make atonement for her before Yahweh for the uncleanness of her discharge. 

 

 

 

That never seeses to crack me up. 
 
 


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I'm sure this has already

I'm sure this has already been done somewhere already, but I really must print out the ones which strike me as the most absurd and/or offensive so I can show them to these street preachers in our City Mall next time our local Atheist Meetup group goes there.

You need some sort of prepared material in that situation where neither of you have an internet-connected computer on hand. I did actually manage to bring up a quote via Google on my iPhone to refute some incidental point they were trying to make. Trying to read a screen while standing up arguing is not ideal, especially a small one. An iPad would presumably be easier, but having the best counter-arguments on sheets of paper is more practical.

 

Favorite oxymorons: Gospel Truth, Rational Supernaturalist, Business Ethics, Christian Morality

"Theology is now little more than a branch of human ignorance. Indeed, it is ignorance with wings." - Sam Harris

The path to Truth lies via careful study of reality, not the dreams of our fallible minds - me

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Couldn't resist


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Freewill

 

butterbattle wrote:

"For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness."" 2 Thessalonians 2:11-12 

 

Love this one, Butter. God deludes them so that all who are deluded can be accused of 'delighting in wickedness' and condemned.

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Great cartoon, Jonathon.

 

Flick me a link if you have a moment - I can't find it on the tube - just a bunch of christians talking about reading the bible out of context....lol.

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Yah, the whole Jesus

Yah, the whole Jesus fulfilled the OT meme is quite bizarre. Really, even if we go with that, there is plenty of weird shit in the NT as well.

 

For example, 1 cor 6:9-10 has a list of people who can't go to heaven:

 

Quote:
 9Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

 10Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

Hold the phone! What is that bit about the effeminate not being able to get to heaven? Did St. Paul just say that metrosexuals can't go to heaven? Or did he list gay guys twice? Apparently, there is a problem with wanting to look presentable.

 

That really doesn't square with the Landmark Baptist preacher who told me that I should cut my hair. After all, all x-tians have neat hair and white shirts with black ties. Oh, also, the OT is still operative when it comes to men's grooming because that is where he had me read the men's grooming tips from before slamming the book shut (presumably so that I could only read the one verse and not understand the context where it says that men should cut their hair).

 

Speaking of the textual context of a passage, I would love to know if the bible supports lesbianism. You could try asking that question.

 

As it happens, they will have to whip out the singular mention of lesbianism in the bible. Romans 1:26 clearly states:

 

Quote:
26Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones.

 

So god made the referenced woman into lesbians for sins stated elsewhere. Actually, the sin is specified a bit before that. It is knowing about god and not giving proper reverence to the dude.

 

Quote:
21For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools 23and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles.

 

So um, if you make raptor jesus jokes, then god will make you gay?

 

 

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Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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God the merciful healer...

 

"Command the children of Israel, that they put out of the camp every leper, and every one that hath an issue, and whosoever is defiled by the dead: Both male and female shall ye put out, without the camp shall ye put them; that they defile not the camps, in the midst whereof I dwell."

 

God - Numbers 5:2 & 3

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Atheistextremist wrote:Flick

Atheistextremist wrote:
Flick me a link if you have a moment - I can't find it on the tube - just a bunch of christians talking about reading the bible out of context....lol.

 

It comes from nonstampcollector. His videos are always great. BTW: right click and select “view on youtube”.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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Ta Gene

 

Cheers for that.


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BobSpence1 wrote:I'm sure

BobSpence1 wrote:
I'm sure this has already been done somewhere already, but I really must print out the ones which strike me as the most absurd and/or offensive so I can show them to these street preachers in our City Mall next time our local Atheist Meetup group goes there.

 

Well, if they hand out tracts, you could respond by handing out some of your own. Normal Bob has them on his web site and they are a hoot and a half.

 

http://www.normalbobsmith.com/free/flyers/

 

I especially like the one titled “Can I be Forgiven?”. It pretty much forces the reader to commit blasphemy.

 

BobSpence1 wrote:
You need some sort of prepared material in that situation where neither of you have an internet-connected computer on hand. I did actually manage to bring up a quote via Google on my iPhone to refute some incidental point they were trying to make. Trying to read a screen while standing up arguing is not ideal, especially a small one. An iPad would presumably be easier, but having the best counter-arguments on sheets of paper is more practical.

 

Another great resource is the skeptics annotated bible.

 

http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/

 

It lets you search on just the NT if you get the idiot line about the OT no longer being in force.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:Oh

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:

Oh man, where do I begin.   Let's see what god said to woman... 

 

Genesis 3:16


3:16: To the woman he said, "I will greatly multiply your pain in childbirth. In pain you will bring forth children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."

 

Very nice!!! Cruel and sexist in one verse. 

 

Malacki 2:2-3


2:2: If you will not listen, and if you will not lay it to heart, to give glory to my name," says Yahweh of Hosts, "then will I send the curse on you, and I will curse your blessings. Indeed, I have cursed them already, because you do not lay it to heart.
 
2:3: Behold, I will rebuke your seed, and will spread dung on your faces, even the dung of your feasts; and you will be taken away with it. 

 

Apparently Yahweh would like to spread some poop on non-believers faces, and food perhaps.
 

 

Numbers 15:32-36


32: While the children of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man gathering sticks on the Sabbath day.
 
15:33: Those who found him gathering sticks brought him to Moses and Aaron, and to all the congregation.
 
15:34: They put him in custody, because it had not been declared what should be done to him.
 
15:35: Yahweh said to Moses, The man shall surely be put to death: all the congregation shall stone him with stones outside of the camp.
 
15:36: All the congregation brought him outside of the camp, and stoned him to death with stones; as Yahweh commanded Moses.

 

  Here Yahweh clearly commands this guy to be killed, for what, gathering some sticks on sunday.  WTF? Maybe he was cold or hungry and needed to make a fire.  What a joke, like decapitating someone for J-walking.

 

  This next one's not god talking specifically, it does say he does approve, but it's just funny as hell.

 

Leviticus 15:19-30


15:19: "'If a woman has a discharge, and her discharge in her flesh is blood, she shall be in her impurity seven days: and whoever touches her shall be unclean until the evening.
 
15:20: "'Everything that she lies on in her impurity shall be unclean. Everything also that she sits on shall be unclean.
 
15:21: Whoever touches her bed shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:22: Whoever touches anything that she sits on shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:23: If it is on the bed, or on anything whereon she sits, when he touches it, he shall be unclean until the evening.
 
15:24: "'If any man lies with her, and her monthly flow is on him, he shall be unclean seven days; and every bed whereon he lies shall be unclean.
 
15:25: "'If a woman has a discharge of her blood many days not in the time of her period, or if she has a discharge beyond the time of her period; all the days of the discharge of her uncleanness shall be as in the days of her period: she is unclean.
 
15:26: Every bed whereon she lies all the days of her discharge shall be to her as the bed of her period: and everything whereon she sits shall be unclean, as the uncleanness of her period.
 
15:27: Whoever touches these things shall be unclean, and shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the evening.
 
15:28: "'But if she is cleansed of her discharge, then she shall count to herself seven days, and after that she shall be clean.
 
15:29: On the eighth day she shall take two turtledoves, or two young pigeons, and bring them to the priest, to the door of the Tent of Meeting.
 
15:30: The priest shall offer the one for a sin offering, and the other for a burnt offering; and the priest shall make atonement for her before Yahweh for the uncleanness of her discharge. 

 

 

 

That never seeses to crack me up. 
 
 

I agree, I can virtually picture the ancient MAN writing this up about a woman's "period". So much of this stuff is just too obviously written by men, not a supreme being.

Maybe a man who THINKS he is a supreme being. The whole bible is just too obvious. You don't need scientific evidence to prove it is false, just common sense and the simple ability to visualize how people were back then. To them a fever was like, a demonic posession, now we know it's a fever and the body's natural attempt to heal.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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Atheistextremist

Atheistextremist wrote:

 

"Command the children of Israel, that they put out of the camp every leper, and every one that hath an issue, and whosoever is defiled by the dead: Both male and female shall ye put out, without the camp shall ye put them; that they defile not the camps, in the midst whereof I dwell."

 

God - Numbers 5:2 & 3

And now we can cure leprosy with antibiotics. That silly god.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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God sux x10000000000
"but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and 
evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."

ppfffffffffffffftttttttttttt

So the LORD said, "I will wipe mankind, whom I have created, from the 
face of the earth--men and animals, and creatures that move along the 
ground, and birds of the air--for I am grieved that I have made them."

Grieved the Ultimate Fuckwitted Fraud will be!

 So God said to Noah, "I am going to put an end to all people, for the 
earth is filled with violence because of them. I am surely going to destroy 
both them and the earth.

No one can blame violence on us, alone. Not rationally, anyways.

 

 "You, however, will go to your fathers in peace and be buried at a 
good old age."

Fahck you Ahsshole!

 

Then the LORD rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah--from 
the LORD out of the heavens.

 Kiss my ass.

"By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to 
the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you 
will return."

DIE!

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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"God sux x10000000000"What I

"God sux x10000000000"

What I actually meant was: God sux his own ass xGoogolplex


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For many will come in my
For many will come in my name, claiming, 'I am the Christ,' and 
will deceive many.

Albert Fish, anyone?

At that time if anyone says to you, 'Look, here is the Christ!' or, 
'There he is!' do not believe it.

"So if anyone tells you, 'There he is, out in the desert,' do not go 
out; or, 'Here he is, in the inner rooms,' do not believe it.

For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform signs and 
miracles to deceive the elect--if that were possible.

And I pulled a bunny out of a magic hat! I'm God! Weeeeeeeeeeee

He replied: "Watch out that you are not deceived. For many will 
come in my name, claiming, 'I am he,' and, 'The time is near.' Do not 
follow them.

I follow whoever the fuck I wish! Brian Sapient, for instance.

Don't let anyone deceive you in any way, for that day will not 
come until the rebellion occurs and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the 
man doomed to destruction.

I certainly hope so...

He will oppose and will exalt himself over everything that is called God 
or is worshiped, so that he sets himself up in God's temple, proclaiming 
himself to be God.

Glad you left an instruction manual for me, fuckface.

Don't you remember that when I was with you I used to tell you these 
things?

I honestly couldn't be PAID to GIVE A SHIT.

And now you know what is holding him back, so that he may be revealed at 
the proper time.

WHAT, if anything, is holding me back?

For the secret power of lawlessness is already at work; but the one who 
now holds it back will continue to do so till he is taken out of the way.

Good... all I have to do is knock his lights out!

And then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord Jesus will 
overthrow with the breath of his mouth and destroy by the splendor of his 
coming.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

A dumber phrase, there is NOT.

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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And Kap

 

How sad is this. God tells Noah he plans to kill everything, so Noah better hurry up and save everything. Why not just zap the evil ones, lord, you dumb cock.

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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"Let there be light" First

"Let there be light"

 

First of all no one was around to hear him. Then there's the fact that there was no media for his vocal vibrations to travel through, even if Jesus and the Holy Spirit were hanging around they couldn't have heard him.


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And here's one from Allah....such a sweet guy.

 

"Lo! Those who disbelieve Our revelations, We shall expose them to the Fire. As often as their skins are consumed We shall exchange them for fresh skins that they may taste the torment. Lo! Allah is ever Mighty, Wise."       Allah - Book 4 (Women), verse 56.

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Atheistextremist

Atheistextremist wrote:

 

"Lo! Those who disbelieve Our revelations, We shall expose them to the Fire. As often as their skins are consumed We shall exchange them for fresh skins that they may taste the torment. Lo! Allah is ever Mighty, Wise."       Allah - Book 4 (Women), verse 56.

But I'm sure it sounds incredibly poetic in the original...

Favorite oxymorons: Gospel Truth, Rational Supernaturalist, Business Ethics, Christian Morality

"Theology is now little more than a branch of human ignorance. Indeed, it is ignorance with wings." - Sam Harris

The path to Truth lies via careful study of reality, not the dreams of our fallible minds - me

From the sublime to the ridiculous: Science -> Philosophy -> Theology


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Stosis wrote:"Let there be

Stosis wrote:

"Let there be light"

 

First of all no one was around to hear him. Then there's the fact that there was no media for his vocal vibrations to travel through, even if Jesus and the Holy Spirit were hanging around they couldn't have heard him.

I'm sure he described the event to his writers, as the telling of a campfire tale. Probably embellished a bit. I wonder how his voice sounded to them, was it like a Sean Connery, or maybe like:

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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Dude, god sound totally like

Dude, god sound totally like Sean Connery.

 

What is the difference between Alex Trebeck and a mallard with a cold?

 

One is a sick duck, I don't remember the rest of it but you mother is a whore.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

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Huh? I thought God sounded

Huh? I thought God sounded like Morgan Freeman.

Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare


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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

Dude, god sound totally like Sean Connery.

 

What is the difference between Alex Trebeck and a mallard with a cold?

 

One is a sick duck, I don't remember the rest of it but you mother is a whore.

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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Even Allah has no idea what his religion is about

 

"O ye who believe! Be Allah's helpers, even as Jesus son of Mary said unto the disciples: Who are my helpers for Allah ? They said: We are Allah's helpers. And a party of the Children of Israel (The Jews) believed, while a party disbelieved. Then We strengthened those who believed (the Christians) against their foe (the Jews), and they became the uppermost."       Allah   The Ranks, Surah 61:14

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

Dude, god sound totally like Sean Connery.

 

What is the difference between Alex Trebeck and a mallard with a cold?

 

One is a sick duck, I don't remember the rest of it but you mother is a whore.

 

"I'll take The Rapists for 200 Alex."

"That's Therapists."

Dolt:"Evolution is just a theory."
Me:"Yes, so is light and gravity. Pardon me while I flash this strobe while dropping a bowling ball on your head. This shouldn't bother you; after all, these are just theories."


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I swear... you people,,,

kidvelvet wrote:

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

Dude, god sound totally like Sean Connery.

 

What is the difference between Alex Trebeck and a mallard with a cold?

 

One is a sick duck, I don't remember the rest of it but you mother is a whore.

 

"I'll take The Rapists for 200 Alex."

"That's Therapists."

... are the living fucking end, sometimes!

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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Atheistextremist wrote:How

Atheistextremist wrote:

How sad is this. God tells Noah he plans to kill everything, so Noah better hurry up and save everything. Why not just zap the evil ones, lord, you dumb cock.

Downright fuckin' pathetic, I'd say...

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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butterbattle wrote:Huh? I

butterbattle wrote:

Huh? I thought God sounded like Morgan Freeman.

That was fiction, you are talking about a movie.

This is the real [email protected]!

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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What, you mean God doesn't sound like George Burns?

robj101 wrote:

butterbattle wrote:

Huh? I thought God sounded like Morgan Freeman.

That was fiction, you are talking about a movie.

This is the real [email protected]!

I'm SHOCKED! Shocked I tell you!

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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The Amphibian Wars

 

"And if thou refuse to let them go, behold, I will smite all thy borders with frogs."

God  -  Exodus 8:2

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Smited!

Atheistextremist wrote:

 

"And if thou refuse to let them go, behold, I will smite all thy borders with frogs."

God  -  Exodus 8:2

"Why is she so much bigger than I am?"

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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The lord threatens space quakes.


 

"I will shake the heavens and the earth"

God  Haggai 2:21

 

 

 


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"Don't imagine that I came

"Don't imagine that I came to bring peace to earth! No rather a sword. I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother-in-law. A man's worst enemies will be right in his own home" Jesus, Matthew 10:34 from the "childrens" living bible.

A herd of pigs was feeding in the distance, so the demons begged "if you cast us out, send us into that herd of pigs." "All right" Jesus told them. "Begone." And they came out of the men and entered the pigs, and the whole herd rushed off over a cliff and drowned in the water below. Matthew 8:30-32 again, in the childrens living bible. Someone call peta.

Faith is the word but next to that snugged up closely "lie's" the want.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in god, in none."-Charlie Chaplin


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nothing......................

nothing...............................................................

 


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maybe the author was talking about a

Atheistextremist wrote:


"I will shake the heavens and the earth"

God  Haggai 2:21

 

“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)


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Good thinking, Kap.

Kapkao wrote:

Atheistextremist wrote:


"I will shake the heavens and the earth"

God  Haggai 2:21

 

 

But too local, don't you think? Shaking the heavens surely means shaking the whole heavens?

 

 

 

"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck


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Solomon

I think Solomon was suppose to be the wisest man ever, biblically.  Two women were in a disagreement about who was the mother of one child so Solomon says that the baby will be cut in half and divided between the women.  Solomon's reasoning was that the real mother would give up the baby before letting it be cut in half and then he would know who the real mother was.  To me, that sounds stupid.  How could he be sure that the other woman would not prefer to give up the baby as opposed to only having half of it?  Who would be okay with only having half of a baby?  It's amazing that people still believe this crap but I guess that fear is a powerful motivator.

You can't convince a believer of anything; for their belief is not based on evidence, it's based on a deep-seated need to believe. - Carl Sagan

Prayer has no place in the public schools, just like facts have no place in organized religion. - School Superintendent on "The Simpsons" episode #1