I think I encountered an argument the deductibvly disproves God
Posted on: May 16, 2008 - 9:37pm
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I think I encountered an argument the deductibvly disproves God
1. God is Omniscient, i.e. knows everything.
2. No one but children know why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
3. God is a timeless being and therefore cannot be a child
4. (2,3 subconclusion) Therefore, god cannot know why kids love cinnamon toast crunch.
5. (1,4 subconclusion) God must therefore both know why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch and not know simultaneously.
6. (5) is an obvious contradiction.
7. A being or object cannot exist with mutually exclusive states
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8. Therefore, god does not exist.
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You might also want to look into Trix theory. It's a newer field of study than CTC, and is (essentially) as follows:
1. God is Omnipotent (all powerful)
2. Trix are for kids, exclusively.
3. God is a deity outside of space and time (and, as CTC theory has already established, not a kid)
4. (2,3 subconclusion) Therefore, God cannot eat a bowl of Trix cereal.
5. (1,4 subconclusion) God must therefore be able to eat a bowl of Trix, and cannot.
6. (5) is an obvious contradiction.
7. A being or object cannot exist with mutually exclusive states
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8. Therefore, God doesn't exist.
Further studies need to be done. Experimentation with cartoon rabbits has made-up most of the progress so far; a search for new cereal mascots is underway.
- Leon Trotsky, Last Will & Testament
February 27, 1940
In your face, Jesuits!
No, #2 doesn't work. I like Cinnamon Toast Crunch and I'm not a child so I understand it. I think a better argument would be, "Only children know why kids think farts are funny."
"The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs" - Bill Maher
1. God is Omniscient and all powerful.
2. Nobody but children know where the Honeycomb Hideout is. Or why a cereal flake the size of a thumbnail is considered big and not small, no, no, no.
3. God can't get his hands on Lucky Charms either, they are magically delicious. Which makes me wonder if leprechauns are more powerful than God. That would be cool.
4. Snap, Krackle and Popp are clearly homosexual, and live in a tree in sin with the Keebler Elves. If God were all powerful, he'd smite them. I know I would if they lived in my tree. So he cannot be all powerful - or just.
5. Therefore, God probably does not exist, and if he did, high fructose corn syrup is apparently the new iron chariot.
I am against religion because it teaches us to be satisfied with not understanding the world. - Richard Dawkins
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Farts are funny because it's the sound of someone's buttcheeks clapping.
Duh.
"I am an atheist, thank God." -Oriana Fallaci
Why can't a timeless being remain a child forever? You know Never, never land. This could explain God's temper tantrums.
Taxation is the price we pay for failing to build a civilized society. The higher the tax level, the greater the failure. A centrally planned totalitarian state represents a complete defeat for the civilized world, while a totally voluntary society represents its ultimate success. --Mark Skousen
What is the sound of one butcheek clapping?
(It's not a koan, it has an answer
The withering of a houseplant.
This has been a Zen moment.
"Anyone can repress a woman, but you need 'dictated' scriptures to feel you're really right in repressing her. In the same way, homophobes thrive everywhere. But you must feel you've got scripture on your side to come up with the tedious 'Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve' style arguments instead of just recognising that some people are different." - Douglas Murray
Half-assed applause.
And the sound of buttcheeks clapping is funny because .... ???
"The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs" - Bill Maher
Why do i have a feeling that one of us, is going to have to define "funny" shortly...
What Would Kharn Do?
Captain,
You, like a standard theist have the same ability to over conflate what should be a simple statement into something needlessly complex.
The reason the omni-god concept is broken is because magic is fantasy, it is merely emotional dreaming.
To believe in a literal omni-god is absurd. It would mean that one would also have to believe such a god could POOF change a cheeseburger into a chair. It would mean that such a god could POOF turn my penis into a bottle cap.
No such being exists because magic is fantasy. God(s)/supernatural/ are merely human dreams.
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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