Suffer the little children, someone just shoot me.
Greetings, ungodly ones. Your lovable pal is back. Now, before you start standing in line waiting to suck me off or lick my face from being so happy to see me, let me get in a word edgewise.
I've had an interesting few months and the summer hasn't been kind to me as it never is around this dusty podunk place, but hey, what can you do when money is tighter than a nun's asshole? I make due with whatever the universe throws my way and I seem to roll with it come Dante's Inferno or Japanese Tsunami. Sorry, that was in bad taste. Anyway, just when I was about to consider doing something drastic to make end's meet, I got not just one job offer, but two. That is a rarity considering the dry spell I've had for jobs in the past year. While one was finalized, the other called me a week later to hire me. Now, the tricky bit. Both were essentially the same job, but the first job was on call and paid more while the second one was M-F for a dollar less. Wouldn't be a problem if they weren't in the afternoon and there in lay the dilemma. Of course, after weighing the pros and cons, I had to go with the sure thing of the second position and considering I spent considerable money on the first job with the hoops they make you jump through just to get clearance, I was a little steamed. What can you do, though? I just had to suck it up and pay AGAIN for the same shit with the second job. Well, not the TB test which they accept for up to four years, but not fingerprinting which doesn't make a lick of sense, but I digress.
After all the red tape was sorted out, I settled into my new job. What job, you may ask? Teaching under-privileged kids.
Yeah, the last thing you'd EVER picture me doing is this. If you knew me and spent enough time as my friend, you'd cock your head to the side and do your best Scooby Doo "Huh?" The fact of the matter is I like kids when they aren't little bastards or disrespectful little shits. By and large, most kids just need structure and someone that gives a fuck enough to let them be themselves rather than stifle creativity, pawn them off or be too strict. It's not different with these guys. Their parents are worker bees that don't have the time to give their kids the attention that they need with homework or extra curricular activities that encourage learning. That's where I come in. I really like filling that role to where they gain some type of balance in their lives and not feel cast aside. It's a good feeling and I like my job so far...
...but that's the bright side. There's also a big dark side.
Now, I really hate yelling or raising my voice at children. It's the last resort, but you have to understand that sometimes it's the only way to get hyper, burnt out or otherwise problem kids to behave. They have their good days and bad days and you have to adjust accordingly. I have about two kids that have the worst behaviors and attention spans and I have to constantly punish them for not listening, but I use them as examples to get the other kids to straighten the fuck up or face consequences. Verbal correction usually works for the rest, though.
I am also constantly juking and jiving colds, flu's, stomach viruses and whatever else these guys bring to the classroom. It's a level five bio-hazard some days and hand sanitizer is my hazmat suit. I swear, I really wish these parents would teach their urchins about proper hygiene because I'd say about 80% of them just do NOT wash their hands unless they're painting or playing with play dough and have no choice. Shit, even then they have to think about it. If I have a sick kid, it's hard to send them away so they don't contaminate me or my class since administration would rather have the potential walking pathogen machine in my environment than lose funding from the day...
...which brings me to my next problem; my director and helpers. There are multiple sites that we operate under and each site has a director and site supervisor. Both are rarely at my site, they micromanage every thing that we do, put new restrictions on what we can and can't do, have a distaste for K-3 grades and many other things that make our job more of a chore than a fun learning experience for all of us. The site I am at, from what I understand, is dangerously close to shutting down and the main school staff dislikes how things are being run. They aren't mad at us because we have no decision in the operating procedures. We're their for the kids, nothing else. They're mad at our bosses for not being more punctual and organized. I came into this job with expectations and they have been smashed to bits like an ornate Ming Dynasty vase. The sad part is that it's not a hard job at all, on the contrary. I enjoy being creative, listening to the kids laugh and seeing how much fun they're all having. What I despise is being lied to about what the job entails, what to expect, what we can do and seeing what exciting things they did in the past and realizing that we can no longer do any of that. It's soul crushing and demoralizing considering this is part of what I've been training for as an educator.
The bright side is that I'm making money and no longer struggling so, I suppose that's something. Still, you can't fault me for being flustered and peeved.
I'm a simple man with a simple plan and if some folks would just stop throwing trash on my little patch of Kentucky Blue, maybe I wouldn't have to keep saying "get off my lawn" while holding an M1 Garand.
That's what's going on with me. Hope you're all doing well and in good health.
"When the majority believes in what is false, the truth becomes a quest." - Me