The Latest Food Creation.

Sage_Override's picture

Everyone here loves bacon, I'm sure.  If you don't, you're not human and must be destroyed immediately (unless you're Muslim, Islamic or Jewish; you just have to be shown the error of your ways, in that case).  Bacon is one of those foods that goes well with pretty much anything; ice cream, waffles, donuts, cupcakes, chips, toothpaste...ok, maybe not toothpaste, but it still exists.  There is a bacon craze in this nation so bad that everyone is experimenting with new ways to infuse it with their favorite foods; some are a good idea, but most aren't.  Hence, the latest concoction to try and monopolize on the idea brought to you by a staple that needs no introduction in the fast food industry; Jack-In-The-Box.


I was a little surprised that JITB made the first move regarding this tasty breakfast treat because they aren't really known for doing something this crazy; we leave that to the likes of McDonald's, Burger King and Taco Bell.  Of course, they have threw me for a loop before with their "Jumbaco" campaign in late 2011 (two tacos in between a Jumbo Jack; was swiftly nixed) and their disturbingly good pumpkin pie shake AKA sugar coma on steroids.  Once more, they are shaking things up, and I mean that both ways, with the all new "bacon shake."


Now, the reason bacon goes well with just about anything is because of it's salty-sweet flavor and complex aroma that seems to be absorbed by anything it's combined with.  The problem, however, with a milkshake is found in the first part of the word; MILK.  Every single experiment I've seen with bacon infusion was baked, fried or used as a seasoning.  Bacon ice cream for example is just plain disgusting because of it's reliance on dairy products.  It's no different with a milkshake because the same outcome occurs; the gruesome clash of the taste buds and an angry stomach.  The review I linked says, in a nutshell, that the bacon shake is just plain repulsive and has a weird aftertaste that was described as "smoky."  Not appealing in the slightest, if you ask me.  If the review didn't convince you enough to not try this shit, consider this; IT'S NOT EVEN REAL BACON THEY'RE USING.  It's a syrup flavoring to give the mere illusion of bacon.  I mean, come on, if you're going to go for the strange and unusual, go the extra mile, folks.  Why half-ass something like this?  People will find out and they will demonize your frosty frankenstein.  All in all, shame on you, JITB; you could have become pioneers of something truly epic, but you have FAILED US ALL.   

"When the majority believes in what is false, the truth becomes a quest." - Me

Kapkao's picture

I'm a sausage kinda guy

I'm a sausage kinda guy myself Eye-wink


“A meritocratic society is one in which inequalities of wealth and social position solely reflect the unequal distribution of merit or skills amongst human beings, or are based upon factors beyond human control, for example luck or chance. Such a society is socially just because individuals are judged not by their gender, the colour of their skin or their religion, but according to their talents and willingness to work, or on what Martin Luther King called 'the content of their character'. By extension, social equality is unjust because it treats unequal individuals equally.” "Political Ideologies" by Andrew Heywood (2003)