Parenting: Rational Polls!
Offline I found these fun to do, and I raised by eyebrows at some of the poll results in which "most" parents on the site felt witchcraft was "morally wrong" and children should be 16 or older to start dating.
Sooo....here are the polls! Fill them out and explain your reasoning:
Q: How should teachers deal with cheating in the classroom?
Ignore it.
Embarrass the cheater.
Notify the parents.
Turn the offender over to the administration.
Talk to the kid
Q: At what age should kids be allowed to date?
10 -- 11 years.
12 -- 13 years.
14 -- 15 years.
16 or older.
Q: How should a school respond to students who sexually harass other students?
Do nothing. It's not a school issue.
Inform the parents.
Require counseling.
Suspend the perpetrator.
Q: At what age should a child be allowed to kiss or make-out?
10 -- 13 years.
12 -- 13 years.
14 -- 15 years.
16 or older.
Q: At what age should kids be allowed to pierce something other than their ears?
10 -- 11 years.
12 -- 13 years.
14 -- 15 years.
16 or older.
Q: Are you in favor of school uniforms?
Yes.
No.
Q: What do you think about holding kids back a grade?
It can be helpful if it's done before second grade.
It's harmful -- I wouldn't retain my child.
It's helpful at any age if the child isn't ready to move on to the next grade.
Q: Experts report that fears may stay after plots are forgotten. How old should kids be before they watch their first horror movie?
5 years old or younger.
6 -- 10 years old.
11-- 15 years old.
16 years old and up.
Never.
Q: Should schools be held responsible for student sexual harassment?
Yes.
No.
No opinion.
Q: Does the use of spell-checkers help kids learn to spell?
Helps.
Hurts.
No opinion.
Q: Should the Ten Commandments be displayed in public schools?
Yes.
No.
No opinion.
Q: Should grandparents get extra benefits and tax breaks to raise grandchildren?
Yes.
No.
No opinion.
Q: Should parents be held responsible for their children's crimes?
Yes.
No.
Maybe, after a case-by-case review.
Q: Should we raise our daughters to be feminists?
Yes.
No.
No opinion.
Q: Should schools ban controversial books from recommended reading lists?
Yes.
No.
Maybe -- on a case by case basis.
No opinion.
Q: When is a child old enough to learn the facts of life?
Six to eight (or less).
Nine to eleven.
Twelve to fourteen.
Fifteen to seventeen.
Q: In July, the House voted to amend the US Constitution to ban the desecration or burning of the American Flag. Do you agree?
Yes.
No.
No opinion.
*Our world is far more complex than the rigid structure we want to assign to it, and we will probably never fully understand it.*
"Those believers who are sophisticated enough to understand the paradox have found exciting ways to bend logic into pretzel shapes in order to defend the indefensible." - Hamby
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Do you happen to have the results of this poll? I am curious since I am the parent of two children - one daughter and one son - and most of my answers to the questions differ for each child. Nearly everything with parenting is a judgement call and as a parent you have to take into account the personality and maturity level of the child. I have informed my children that I parent them individually and they should not expect fairness. This is not to say that I don't treat them fairly, but I am not going to allow one to do something simply because I allowed the other to do it. Freedoms (such as dating, piercings, etc.) come with responsibility so I make those decisions accordingly.
School issues should also be dealt with on an individual basis. Again, all children are different. If a child is sexually harrassing other children, the situation should be examined to see if the child exhibits tendancies toward becoming a predator or if if was a peer pressure situation or if the whole thing is getting blown out of proportion. Sadly, rational parents are in the minority so school administration is forced to walk a fine line between protecting the children and protecting themselves.
I could go through the entire list, but the questions are designed to illicit knee-jerk responses and my rational answers would only encourage others here to say "Yeah!" Perhaps what is needed is rational parenting classes. Or rational school boards. Or rational government......need I go on?
C) I think that virtually all kids in school realize that cheating is wrong. I dont see anything wrong with them being sent to the "authorities" where the kid can learn a bit about the old phrase, "crime doesnt pay."
A)Of course, a date to a 10-11 year old is different than a date between 25 year-olds. I think kids should learn how to interact with the other gender as early as possible.
The whole sexual harassment thing is very inconsistent, and often in cases like this, absolutely no common sense is used when deciding what is or isnt sexual harassment. If it's TRUE harassment, then D.
I would select E) none of the above. It's not a matter or allowing it or not. When the kid feels like doing it, he/she is going to regardless of whether or not it's allowed.
D) But with parental consent, they could get it done sooner.
Yes.
B) The social rejection that kid would feel the rest of his grade school days isnt worth rehashing 4th grade math. If the kid is capable but lazy, put him in summer school, and if he's really incapable, he probably needs special ed. at that point.
With an adult -- B, on their own -- C. I can't recall anyone I know ever fearing that a man with razor fingers could possibly kill them in their sleep.
No. Unless it's a repeat offender at that school, and that school did not exhaust all legal means of preventing a repeat offence. The bulk of the responsibility has to rest with the kid and his/her parents.
No opinion.
No. Duh.
Depending on the circumstances, I'd say yes. Most grandparents I know could use the extra benefits.
C)
A) Yes, but with an emphasis on the reality that equal doesnt mean equal in every single facet of life. Men have their strengths, and women have theirs as well.
No.
A) No need to give them the adult version quite yet, but why not educate them to a degree as to how humans work?
No. If the U.S. government handed down the decision, it's most likely the wrong one.
{Mod edit - tried to fix quotes; did not work}
"The powerful have always created false images of the weak."
I actually agree with all of your responses.
True dat.
*Our world is far more complex than the rigid structure we want to assign to it, and we will probably never fully understand it.*
"Those believers who are sophisticated enough to understand the paradox have found exciting ways to bend logic into pretzel shapes in order to defend the indefensible." - Hamby
RESULTS from the seemingly strict, overly-involved website of parents:
At what age should kids be allowed to date?
How should teachers deal with cheating in the classroom?
How should a school respond to students who sexually harass other students?
At what age should a child be allowed to kiss or make-out?
At what age should kids be allowed to pierce something other than their ears?
Are you in favor of school uniforms?
What do you think about holding kids back a grade?
Experts report that fears may stay after plots are forgotten. How old should kids be before they watch their first horror movie?
Should schools be held responsible for student sexual harassment?
Does the use of spell-checkers help kids learn to spell?
Should grandparents get extra benefits and tax breaks to raise grandchildren?
Should parents be held responsible for their children's crimes?
Should we raise our daughters to be feminists?
Should schools ban controversial books from recommended reading lists?
When is a child old enough to learn the facts of life?
Should the Ten Commandments be displayed in public schools?
In July, the House voted to amend the US Constitution to ban the desecration or burning of the American Flag. Do you agree?
*Our world is far more complex than the rigid structure we want to assign to it, and we will probably never fully understand it.*
"Those believers who are sophisticated enough to understand the paradox have found exciting ways to bend logic into pretzel shapes in order to defend the indefensible." - Hamby
Oh, and as far as the 10 Commandments being posted, I say YES they should! Just not the ones from the bible. I propose the following 10 Commandments be posted in every school:
Please note that I have no children so I may very well not have a clue what I'm talking about.
Q: How should teachers deal with cheating in the classroom?
Notify the parents.
Turn the offender over to the administration.
Talk to the kid
These three. However, it does depend on how the parents will address the situation. Some parents refuse to believe their little Johnny or Jane would do such a thing.
I also believe that a teacher should be absolutely sure cheating has taken place.
Q: At what age should kids be allowed to date?
It depends on what is defined as a "date" and who the child is going to date.
I think it's great that a lot of kids do a "group date" and it's just a bunch of kids going to the movies or playing miniature golf without pairing up.
When it comes to a girl and a boy going out, just the two of them, it totally depends on the maturity level of the child.
Q: How should a school respond to students who sexually harass other students?
This totally depends on how sexual harassment is defined. It's ridiculous to suspend a five year old for planting a kiss on the object of a crush.
Notes passed in class pointing out body parts or what they'd like to do with an unwilling partner on Saturday night is not acceptable at any age. Grabbing another student on "personal" parts is never acceptable. Done on school grounds, it starts with the administration and the parents should be notified.
Again, the school is going to have to take into account the attitude of the parents/guardians. The parents of some boys will take the attitude "boys will be boys" and that should not be acceptable.
Q: At what age should a child be allowed to kiss or make-out?
I agree with Roisin Dubh: It's not a matter or allowing it or not. When the kid feels like doing it, he/she is going to regardless of whether or not it's allowed.
Q: At what age should kids be allowed to pierce something other than their ears?
First of all, eeeeuuuuu. (But to each their own!) Again, it would depend on the child, but if I were going to vote for a "rule" it would be 16.
Q: Are you in favor of school uniforms?
Yes because it would remove a great deal of peer pressure.
Q: What do you think about holding kids back a grade?
It depends on WHY a child is being held back. I'm totally against the way some parents in Texas hold their sons back a grade for the sole reason that they'll be bigger and stronger in order to play football in high school.
If a child is doing poorly in classes, I think someone should first attempt to ascertain why. Are they bored? Do they need to be challenged? Are they lazy? Do they need to get some enthusiasm? Do they need a different teacher? Do they hate school for a non-academic reason?
If it's truly a learning problem and no attempts to find alternative learning methods have helped, first try summer school. If that doesn't work, it would likely be a remedial learning situation. It does no good to pass a child along if they're behind because it will only grow worse as time goes on.
Q: Experts report that fears may stay after plots are forgotten. How old should kids be before they watch their first horror movie?
Again, it depends on the child. Some kids can watch anything and go their merry way. Some of the more sensitive types may become fearful and have nightmares.
I will also add that adults should also be careful of children that see horror (slasher) movies and act out violently.
Q: Should schools be held responsible for student sexual harassment?
This depends on the individual situation. Just because it happened on school grounds doesn't mean the perpetrator wasn't stealthy about it.
However, once it comes to light, if it's truly harassment (see answer above) if the school failed to address the issue, I believe that it should be held culpable. This also holds true for parents/guardians.
Q: Does the use of spell-checkers help kids learn to spell?
Kids need to learn to spell and kids need to learn to do arithmetic before utilizing spell check and calculators.
Q: Should the Ten Commandments be displayed in public schools?
Absolutely NOT.
Q: Should grandparents get extra benefits and tax breaks to raise grandchildren?
If the parent(s) is still taking the deduction, I do not believe a second deduction should be in order. However, if the grandparent is truly raising the child, I believe the grandparent should get the income tax deduction, not the parent.
Q: Should parents be held responsible for their children's crimes?
This should be taken on a case-by-case basis. If a parent allows a child to run wild, it is to a great degree, the parent's fault and they should be held accountable. However, if it can be shown that the parent has repeatedly attempted to address any issues without success, I think that should absolve them and the child should be punished as an adult.
Q: Should we raise our daughters to be feminists?
Daughters should be taught to be proud of themselves and know that they are just as worthy of any endeavor as a man.
I will add one caveat to that. If a job requires certain physical skills, a woman should prove herself as worthy of a man if she wants the job. For instance, if the "rule" for being a firefighter is that you can lug a fire hose or carry someone down a ladder, the rule shouldn't be changed for a tiny gal that's 4'10" who can't lift a bowling ball.
When my house is on fire and I'm on the second floor, I want Bubba on the ground offering to catch me, not Muffy that's a size 2 and can't even catch my cat. If Muffy can bench press the same as the men, I think she should be allowed to be a firefighter.
Q: Should schools ban controversial books from recommended reading lists?
Who gets to decide what's controversial, so the answer is no. If something is controversial in a religious or political sense, that would make for an excellent learning opportunity.
Q: When is a child old enough to learn the facts of life?
I believe that children start with simple questions when they are quite young. I think you should give them truthful answers without going into more details than necessary for the really young ones. As they get older and have questions (hopefully they'll ask their parents and not their peers), I think a parent should sit and have an honest discussion, asking what they want to know as well as answering their questions.
Q: In July, the House voted to amend the US Constitution to ban the desecration or burning of the American Flag. Do you agree?
Who gets to decide what desecration is? Some people are offended by artwork or tee shirts with the American flag. Burning the flag is a "time honored" non-violent way of protest.
While I would not burn a flag (other than the accepted method of discarding a worn, torn flag), I believe this amendment is unconstitutional in regard to the right of free expression.
By the way, I really like JCE's 10 commandments.
Atheist Books, purchases on Amazon support the Rational Response Squad server.
I think there are a lot of questions or answers that are invalid on this for one thing. But especially the whole dating section. The question asking when kids should be allowed to date is flawed. The real question is when to we view a boy and girl together on a date instead of just two kids playing together?
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
I have four children that will have to deal with the children of these other parents so this is informative.
Turn the offender over to the administration. It is their job to enforce the curriculum. The parents of repeat offenders should be 'called onto the carpet' as well.
14-15 after education concerning sexuality. The dates should be supervised by a a parent until age 18. e.g. Sitting 3 rows back at the movie theater. At another table in the restaurant. At the dance serving punch. etc. There, but not right in their face.
A school is to educate. Students should be informed as to what constitutes sexual harassment. Lay down the rules and enforce them equally without respect to gender. Suspend the perpetrator, inform the parents of both instigator and victim.
Whoa! You can control this??? I had no idea. I see nothing wrong with a kiss. There will come a time when I'm probably like this dad:
14-15 with consent from the parent by a professional with their parent of the same gender present. If my son wants a PA then we'll go see Uncle Steve. If my daughter wants her guiche done then it's Mommy's problem.
Yes. Not only would it take the student's mind off of 'what they're wearing', but it promotes responsibility. There is time for individuality outside of the school environment. It is essentially the same in real life. Suits or uniforms to work in and whatever when work is done.
We kept my son back from Kindergarten for a year because of his speech. It was helpful.
To me, it is more a question concerning whether or not the parents will take the time to explain why the movie is JUST a movie. It can be a very good conversation. My son and I had a debate concerning the plausibility of zombies after watching 'Shaun of the Dead'. Chemical mental inhibitors and diffusion. He's 12. The 5 yr. old girl just walked around the living room trying to bite people and laughing.
Ummm. Isn't this a repeat question? The answer is YES if the harassment takes place at school. Anywhere else and it is a job for the police.
Helps. Rote memory works by repetition. Religions have counted on this for millenia. Facts such as the correct spelling of a word and the definition and context of that word can be useful at a later date to communicate and understand new ideas.
It crosses the line when it becomes response conditioning.
No. Neither should the bhagavad gita, the torah, the q'uran, or any other document not related to general education.
No more than being able to claim the child as a dependent. Fuck income taxes anyway.
Yes. I've been saying this since Columbine.
No. We should be raising all children to perceive each other as equal regardless of gender, race, and/or sexuality.
NO! NEVER!
A little at a time over the years prior to menstruation or nighttime ejaculation. Special emphasis should be made with regard to consequences. Facts not fear should be a mantra for parents tasked with informing children. As early as age 5, children should be told that NO ONE is allowed to touch their genitals except for a doctor with the parent of the same gender present. That's special. It's your body and people should respect that.
I know it sounds too young, but we live in a world where sexual assault of children by authority figures has been covered up for so long that it is a necessity for us to stop it.
Burn every flag on the earth. Without idolatrous symbols to reaffirm our differences then we can get down to solving those differences.
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