Accosted by "aura-masseuses"

GlamourKat
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Accosted by "aura-masseuses"

So, this weekend ImmaculateDeception and I were going to get some pizza. The pizza place is along the main road by his house, and, well, there are a lot of "odd" people out that way.
A man and a woman, both young, stopped us on the sidewalk and said, "Hello!"

The woman told ImmaculateDeception to hold out his cupped hands and he, thinking she was going to give him something, did just that.
At which point the two started "massaging" the air around him. The guy tells him that what they're doing will "relax him".
ImmaculateDeception replied, "What if I'm already relaxed?"
They pretty much ignored his comment and continued to molest his personal space bubble.

Meanwhile, I'm standing off to the side and watching these people very closely. This is a big city, and there are always scammers and pickpockets out and about. They're both dressed in fairly normal clothing, pants, shirts, toques. EXCEPT for the embroidered chinese style robes they have on over their normal clothes. And bags and pockets and stuff all over them.
They're rubbing his "aura" all over and keep asking him things like "Do you feel anything? A warmth? A tingling?"
He replies, "Um, I feel kind of hungry."
The man responds tersely, "Don't worry about that!"

At this point we're gaining a sort of "moving audience" as people turn around and stare on the sidewalk.
Meanwhile, these two are intently trying to "cure" ImmaculateDeception of whatever it is they think he needs to be "cured" of.

At this point, I can't take it anymore, and I start laughing. I have seen ImmaculateDeception tell street preachers to "Fuck off!" and yet he's standing in front of me like a deer in headlights with 2 weirdos rubbing his "life energy".
I tell him with a smirk, "I'm SO telling the RRS."
He rolls his eyes and said, "Yeah, yeah."
I try to save him by whining, "I'm hungry, can we get pizza now?"
But they keep on "healing him", getting more frantic at the fact that he apparently can't feel anything.
Finally, he says, "Sorry, guys, I have to go get some dinner."

The young woman looks absolutely stricken. "We have nuts!", she yelps as she digs in her many bags and satchels, "You can have some nuts!"
We politely extricate ourselves and carry on to the pizza place.
I turn to ImmaculateDeception and state, "Don't drink the Kool-Aid!"
Much hilarity ensues.
We eat pizza.

These people didn't act like scammers. They didn't try to take any of our stuff. I think they were the real deal of whatever it is they ARE. They honestly seemed to be concerned about healing him. We started discussing what religion they could be, or if they were just hippy-dippy new age kids with cult-y leanings. What do you guys think? And has this happened to anyone else?
This was DEFINATELY a weird experience.


ImmaculateDeception
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Yeah, that was strange. You

Yeah, that was strange. You know...I'm still not feeling anything either.

Maybe it'll hit me in a couple of days. Maybe I'll grow horns or something. That would be sweet.

Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine


darth_josh
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Shit. Next time, fall down

Shit.
Next time, fall down and scream, "OUCH! god dammit. You bruised my aura. This'll take a week to heal."
Then writhe around in pain screaming for a cop until they run away.

I had some flake ask to hold my hand to check my palm for a reading. I told him that there was a nice little quiet video store down the block and what he could do with his hand there.

In the Birmingham airport in 2003, there was a guy selling crystals. I asked one of the security officers if that was such a good idea since those crystals could contain some sort of poison. Two of them went over and took him and his stuff into the little room. lol.
On that same flight, there was a woman reading her bible. I leaned over and said, "Excuse me. Do you know something about this flight that perhaps you should tell us all?" That was kind of mean since the guy next to me was already sweating bullets for his first flight. lol.

I promise you. Every one of the people with these irrational beliefs that you meet head on with humor or insult will go home and think about it.

At some point, every fucking one of them looks into the mirror in the morning and says, "Am I fucking nuts??"
The hope is that one of these days they'll fail to rationalize themselves out of the house until they come to terms with reality.

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Razorcade
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Bruised Aura

Fuck, that never happens to me and I could really use my Aura rubbed.


MattShizzle
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Fucking weird.

Fucking weird.


ImmaculateDeception
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Quote:At some point, every

Quote:
At some point, every fucking one of them looks into the mirror in the morning and says, "Am I fucking nuts??"
The hope is that one of these days they'll fail to rationalize themselves out of the house until they come to terms with reality.

Yeah, they seemed pretty frantic when it wasn't working. They were really trying, waving their hands around me frantically. I felt like I was being molested by mimes.

They'll hang on to their beleifs harder than you might think. The part town that it happened in was right around where I live. It's a really liberal community their, alot of students and free thinkers in the neighborhood. However, alot of people are this weird blend of agnostic-theists. They don't subsribe to any specific religion and usually agree with you that religion is a flawed concept, however the practice this weird mish-mash of buddhism and wicca. They'll nod their heads fervently when you trash christianity, but fly off the handle if you deny the existance of a higher power. I've had good many conversations in the local pub which end with me saying "well, if you think religion is ridiculous, is it so hard to except that it's founding princpal is as well?" . This is usual met with a blank stare and a request for another pint.

Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine


Yellow_Number_Five
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Assaulted by oral masseuses?

Assaulted by oral masseuses?

Nice.


MarthaSplatterhead (not verified)
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I've been told that my aura

I've been told that my aura looked weak. I think it's some kind of passive aggressive put-down.


Asmoday
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If Immaculate Conception

If Immaculate Conception turns out to be severely ill, for whatever reason please let us know so we can all laugh a those morons whose healing powers really didn't work AT ALL...

To me it sounds like two people who are having a lot of fun fucking with peoples heads. I dont think they were serious, I think they were acting, and having fun fucking with people. They may be members of some occult school of thought. Thelemites, or OTO members, and I am guessing they thought it would be fun to mock the idea of some new age ideas.

and on the otherhand, they could ahve been completely serious people who are into the wrong stuff.......
But when the women said we have nuts we have nuts..... I can thelp but think these people are jokers....I HOPE ROTF

For example... if someone could look inside you and see some desease in your body, would they use "imagination" and attempt to heal you out of thin air? or would they tell you what they see, and give you medical advice/tell you to go and see the doctor.. I think they would tell you what they see and advise you to seek medical treatment, if they were indeed able to see inside your body and look at organs.... and of course... for them to know what the fuck they are looking at and whats wrong, they would need a medical backround in order to ahve the proper lexicon to actually do the sick person any good....

:|

"Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside awakens."

-Carl G. Jung