CHECK THIS NEW MOVIE OUT!!

LeftofLarry
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CHECK THIS NEW MOVIE OUT!!

hahahaha...YES!!!! first a movie about death of jesus, now one about his immaculate birth.

http://www.thenativitystory.com/

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Yeah, I just saw the

Yeah, I just saw the commercial. Joseph reaches out to pull Mary across a raging river.

ROTF

I can't wait to see what flights of fancy they get up to-- and to watch the Christians fall all over themselves to proclaim it the inspired truth, just like they did with The Passion of the Christ.

I've been reading Jesus in Egypt by Paul Perry; it's about the Coptic Church and how they believe the Holy Family traveled through Egypt while hiding from the Roman soldiers. Some of the churchmen as much as say they have changed their estimation, over the years, of where they believe were the locations of the family's stops; and that whenever the site 'moves on,' a well where they drank, or a house where they stayed a night, is literally decided to have been in another town the next time they do a reading. All the people tell Perry they're now sure that this one is the right one. Maybe the spelling of a town name is a few letters different from one copy of a manuscript to another. Sticking out tongue And next time it moves, they'll be just as sure about the new finding.

It's like saying Paris is the same thing as Pittsburgh because they both start with the letter P.


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LeftofLarry

LeftofLarry wrote:
hahahaha...YES!!!! first a movie about death of jesus, now one about his immaculate birth.

http://www.thenativitystory.com/


so, are you going to go see it? I don't think I could stomach it myself. I haven't seen the Passion yet either.


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MarthaSplatterhead

MarthaSplatterhead wrote:
LeftofLarry wrote:
hahahaha...YES!!!! first a movie about death of jesus, now one about his immaculate birth.

http://www.thenativitystory.com/


so, are you going to go see it? I don't think I could stomach it myself. I haven't seen the Passion yet either.

I haven't seen The Passion yet, but I saw some clips of the whipping.
Is it wrong that I got turned on by a longhaired shirtless man being whipped? wtf
No, seriously. Even all that blood was sexy. And he was all moaning and stuff. blushing
There is seriously something wrong in my head. I think I'll make a commercial featuring all the S&M clips from "The Passion of the Christ" with a porny bow chicka bow wow music track. Evil

Seeing the Nativity Story? Maybe I'll download it. I have a fantasy about going to the theatre just to heckle it, but one of my pet peeves is people who are jackasses in movies, so it'll stay just a sweet fantasy.

I think we need a Flying Spaghetti Monster movie. Hahaha. And Uwe Boll should direct it. And there should be lots of car chases and explosions, and a scene with a topless girl, and an ending where the goofy character says something dumb and all the other characters say the goofy characters name and the screen fades to black as they all laugh..... Laughing out loud

Movie commercial narrator voice:
He flies. He's spaghetti. He's a monster.
Flying Spaghetti Monster: The Movie.
Get touched by his noodly appendage this winter.


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:: That would be awesome!

:ROTF: That would be awesome! FSM movie. Maybe even an emotional scene where someone gets whipped with some noodles, idk.


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I think I will choose not to

I think I will choose not to give these guys any of my money. Smiling I don't think this will be as bad as the Passion of the christ. It looks kinda corny really. I'd rather spend my money shooting down shots of Jack Daniels. Smiling

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The thing that was fucked up

The thing that was fucked up about the Passion was that xtians bent double over backwards to talk about how it was ok for kids to see this movie, because it brought home the reality of the suffering of their silly little messiah.

A girl I used to date had a crazy fucked up religious dad and twin brothers who were about 13 or 14 when the movie came out. We drove down to visit them, and when we went in, the Passion was on in the background. Her dad talked pleasantly while they beat the shit out of this dude on tv and blood and gore was spewing all over the place just like some b-grade horror flick. Later, my ex-gf asked her dad if he thought it was ok for them to see that kind of thing, and he said that not only was it ok, it was important for them, so that they could understand just what Jesus did for them.

This is the same dad who screens PG-13 movies before letting them watch... mostly because he's afraid they might see a boob or something equally disastrous to their upbringing. Could they go see a violent R rated movie without Jesus in it? Hell no!

The sick thing about this is that so many xtians are completely oblivious to the double standard, and see it as perfectly logical... the same way that they see it as perfectly logical that the mean, angry son of a bitch god in the old testament is the same one in the new testament... or that an unchanging god could come up with a plan so daft that it would need to be adjusted... not once, but twice!

(Remember his first "adjustment" involved killing everybody except Noah and his posse. Jesus was the second twink in the plan.)

Atheism isn't a lot like religion at all. Unless by "religion" you mean "not religion". --Ciarin

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GlamourKat wrote:Is it wrong

GlamourKat wrote:
Is it wrong that I got turned on by a longhaired shirtless man being whipped?

No, especially when it's a longhaired shirtless man that looks like Jim Caviezel. It's too bad he's so religious...and a republican. Sad I didn't go see The Passion of the Christ, but I saw a few clips of it from The God Who Wasn't There. Funny.


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GlamourKat wrote:Is it wrong

GlamourKat wrote:
Is it wrong that I got turned on by a longhaired shirtless man being whipped? wtf
No, seriously. Even all that blood was sexy. And he was all moaning and stuff. blushing
There is seriously something wrong in my head.

I personally know a few women who would agree with you, so don't feel bad. You aren't the first one I've heard make this comment!

I'm sure many of you have already seen this clip. For the benefit of those who haven't, I'll post the link...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuLaHyWuxFQ


LeftofLarry
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wait...what are we talking

wait...what are we talking about again? Sticking out tongue


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Christen wrote:GlamourKat

Christen wrote:
GlamourKat wrote:
Is it wrong that I got turned on by a longhaired shirtless man being whipped?

No, especially when it's a longhaired shirtless man that looks like Jim Caviezel. It's too bad he's so religious...and a republican. Sad I didn't go see The Passion of the Christ, but I saw a few clips of it from The God Who Wasn't There. Funny.

Yeah, he's definately a hottie. I have a thing for slim guys with long hair. blushing
Damn his religiosity. Oh well, I don't have to talk to him in real life ever. Laughing out loud

Are there any big name stars in The Nativity Story? Or is it no-names all the way? And is this one gonna be in Aramaic too? Shocked


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'Nativity' booted from Ill.

'Nativity' booted from Ill. holiday fair
By DON BABWIN, Associated Press Writer
Mon Nov 27, 11:24 PM ET

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061128/ap_on_re_us/christmas_movie_snub

CHICAGO - A public Christmas festival is no place for the Christmas story, the city says. Officials have asked organizers of a downtown Christmas festival, the German Christkindlmarket, to reconsider using a movie studio as a sponsor because it is worried ads for its film "The Nativity Story" might offend non-Christians.

New Line Cinema, which said it was dropped, had planned to play a loop of the new film on televisions at the event. The decision had both the studio and a prominent Christian group shaking their heads.

"The last time I checked, the first six letters of Christmas still spell out Christ," said Paul Braoudakis, spokesman for the Barrington, Ill.-based Willow Creek Association, a group of more than 11,000 churches of various denominations. "It's tantamount to celebrating Lincoln's birthday without talking about Abraham Lincoln."

He also said that there is a nativity scene in Daley Plaza — and that some vendors at the festival sell items related to the nativity.

The city does not want to appear to endorse one religion over another, said Cindy Gatziolis, a spokeswoman for the Mayor's Office of Special Events. She acknowledged there is a nativity scene, but also said there will be representations of other faiths, including a Jewish menorah, all put up by private groups. She stressed that the city did not order organizers to drop the studio as a sponsor.

"Our guidance was that this very prominently placed advertisement would not only be insensitive to the many people of different faiths who come to enjoy the market for its food and unique gifts, but also it would be contrary to acceptable advertising standards suggested to the many festivals holding events on Daley Plaza," Jim Law, executive director of the office, said in a statement.

Officials with the German American Chamber of Commerce of the Midwest, which has organized the event for several years, did not immediately return calls for comment. The festival started Thursday.

An executive vice president with New Line Cinema, Christina Kounelias, said the studio's plan to spend $12,000 in Chicago was part of an advertising campaign around the country. Kounelias said that as far as she knew, the Chicago festival was the only instance where the studio was turned down.

Kounelias said she finds it hard to believe that non-Christians who attended something called Christkindlmarket would be surprised or offended by the presence of posters, brochures and other advertisements of the movie.

"One would assume that if (people) were to go to Christkindlmarket, they'd know it is about Christmas," she said

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Ok... I know the nativity

Ok... I know the nativity story is a bunch of bull. I've rolled my eyes at the previews for this film...

But honestly... I think it is a little odd that people don't want it shown at a freaking CHRISTMAS FESTIVAL. As much as I hate to agree with Christian groups, I have to admit that if one is offended by the Christmas story they should probably just avoid the festival in the first place.

If they were showing it to children in a public school, for example, I would be upset.


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FundamentallyFlawed wrote:I

FundamentallyFlawed wrote:
I have to admit that if one is offended by the Christmas story they should probably just avoid the festival in the first place.

yeah fuckin hilarious, right?


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There was a great review of

There was a great review of the film in this week's edition of Philadelphia Weekly. They turned their most wise-ass atheist columnist loose on it!

http://www.philadelphiaweekly.com/view.php?id=13515

Jesus Christ Movie Star

When it comes to the nativity story, reenactments should be left to the kids.

by Steven Wells

“It's a journey of over 100 miles, through treacherous terrain, made much more difficult by the fact that Mary is nine months pregnant.” And on the way she and Joseph have to fight off grizzly bears and cougars, all while keeping the Thanksgiving cake safe. Oh, hang on—that's The Magic of Lassie. Same plot, different movie.

Following The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and The Passion of the Christ comes yet another movie designed to fleece rural simpletons. There's gold in them there hillbillies.

And how could this flick lose? The story of how Mary convinced Joseph she'd been impregnated by a ghost and the baby who was born in a barn and visited by shepherds and kings has been acted out by cuddly Christian kids for generations. Thus the tale is inextricably tangled up in our heads with notions of innocence and cuteness. Which means our critical faculties are on hold. Because what sort of kid-hating rotter is going to yell: “But this story is just silly made-up rubbish! And that's so obviously a fake beard. What a rip. Boo!”

Nah, we switch off our brains and suck up the cute.

Which is why it's utter madness to cast this film with proper grownup actors. With the cute-goggles removed, it's all but impossible for a reasonably intelligent adult not to spend the entire 101 minutes snorting with contempt at the patently absurd antihistorical cobbling together of assorted pagan and Jewish fairy tales.

That said, Nativity's attention to historical detail is astounding. Not only do all the cast members look passably Middle Eastern, but the clothes, the ploughs, the cheese—even the uniforms worn by wicked King Herod's evil tax collectors—everything smacks of old-school first-century Palestinian authenticity.

Except the plot. Things start to go wrong in the first few minutes when God tells an old bloke to impregnate his aging wife with the baby who'll grow up to be John the Baptist. The old bloke quite naturally asks a few polite questions, so God strikes the geezer dumb.

For a start, this obviously never happened—which makes all the historical accuracy a complete waste of time. And if it did, it means God is a petulant dickhead. So why worship the idiot? And more important, if you knew that the genocidal lunatic responsible for the Hitler-on-steroids atrocities of the flood and Sodom and Gomorrah was going to beget a son, wouldn't it be your Christian/Jewish/humanitarian duty to kidnap the poor little bugger away from his patently insane pa? Before he raped him or sacrificed him or had him crucified or something?

Sadly, despite its many mindstretching contradictions, Nativity is in no way as entertaining as Jesus Christ Superstar, Monty Python's Life of Brian or How the Grinch Stole Christmas—all of which cover pretty much the same ground.

What's the point of getting all gritty and sweaty and real—and then having angels with mad, starry eyes and neatly trimmed beards swanning about doing ooga-booga spooky magic tricks? Not to mention completely ridiculous and historically inaccurate plot twists like King Herod having everybody return to their hometown for a census. Why would you do that? Rather than just ask people where they were born on the census form? Can you believe people built a religion out of this hogwash?

This is the danger of having adults act out fairy tales. It presses the WTF? button big-time.

One imagines Nativity's core audience will be Christian youth groups. That should work out fine—right up to where Mary claims to have been knocked up by a “holy ghost.” Those Christian kids with inadequate brainwashing will start snickering at this point, while those with too much will scream, “Stone the fornicating bitch!” and hurl their shoes at the screen.

But it's the kids in the middle I feel sorry for. Torn between 21st-century common sense and bronze-age mumbo-jumbo, the stupendous ridiculousness of Nativity might well fry their brains, sending them screaming into the night to restart their lives as meth dealers, whores, heavy metal guitarists and outlaw bikers.

“Discover the true meaning of Christmas,” says the blurb. I will—drunk and gorged with my loved ones, safely insulated from the spirit-withering superstitious crap that ruins the holiday season for millions. Happy yule! Ho ho ho!