another myspace bulletin
Click here for the actual bulletin text that prompted me to write this, but here is what I just posted to myspace:
I'm not going to repost the entire thing because some people (COUGH COUGH Audrey COUGH COUGH ) will repost it and I would have helped spread it.
It's basically about a boy who dies of cancer and the mom is all sad about it and asks the standard "Why oh why God?"
In no way to I believe any of this story actually happened, but I'd like to address a few things...
Sally said, "Why do little children get cancer?
Doesn't God care any more? Where were you,
God, when my son needed you?"
Cancer is intelligently designed.
"Would you like a lock of his hair?" the nurse
Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the
boy's hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to
That's disgusting and creepy.
It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Laying
beside her on the bed was a folded letter. The
I'm not going to quote the whole letter, but it's long and involved and has little Jimmy or whatever his name was writing a letter to his mom and having an angel "he thinks" named Gabriel deliver it. OMG, what a huge conincidence that it is Gabriel, LOLOL, not.
Then you have the part where the god is santa, taking the boy on the lap and jesus is up there too. Here's the problem with that one. Most christians believe that jesus is god in a mortal body on earth. He wouldn't be up in heaven, because he would just be god. Whatever, that's beside the point.
He mentions using "God's personal pen". I wonder if that's the same one he used to write the bible with all the errors in it. This entire story is absurd.
God said for me to give you the answer to
one of the questions you asked Him 'Where was He
when I needed him?' "God said He was in the
same place with me, as when His son Jesus was
on the cross. He was right there, as He always is
with all His children.
Except the difference is, he didn't mention executing kids with cancer for the sins of the world in the bible (that he didn't write).
Oh but that is the crux of the issue isn't it? Let's assume for a moment that I believe in a god, in the christian sense (I'll even capitalize "God", "He", and "Him" if it helps). Let's create an ordered list of events:
- God is existing for an eternal period since no one apparently created Him
- God at some point (which you cannot really define since time wouldn't exist eternally) decides that He is lonely (a human emotion) and creates an entire universe (which is still expanding as though it begin through a rapid expansion of matter and energy)
- Once He created this entire massive universe, He created a single planet off in the corner somewhere that would house His chosen species/lifeforms
- Now, even though the bible says it was "void and without form", "His face moved across the waters". Strange, void yet having water. I'll excuse that one.
- OK, now we need night and day to be divided for us by God. So He created "two lights". Oops! One problem! One's not a light! (The moon is a reflective surface for the sun).
- The speed of light proves that the objects we can see in the distance are older than the 6-10K years that young earth creationists believe in. Oh, and of course radiometric dating, but that's a totally different subject that christians love to attack. At least they hopefully won't debate the speed of light.
- In Genesis 1, God creates animals before man. In Genesis 2, it's the other way around. Christian apologists will argue nominal versus ordinal numbers. I've read it before. Ridiculous.
- OK, I'm done with the stupid contradictions from the first couple of pages of the bible.
- However you then get around the contradictions, let us now assume God has created heavens, earth, animals, universe, man, and everything else.
- He sees then that Adam is lonely, even though he should have known that beforehand as an omniscient being, so He rips out a rip to make her. Ridiculous
- He creates a tree that he KNOWS that Adam and Eve will eat from, because he is omniscient. However, it's not actually a sin, because until they eat from it, sin is unknown to them, since it's the tree of knowledge of good an evil. Ridiculous.
- OK, so God is pissed (about something He knew would happen) and banishes them to have to have pain during childbirth and other such things such as death.
- So then God makes people sacrifice defenseless animals to Him, because that makes Him feel like a big boy.
- He then decides at some random point that people shouldn't have to do that anymore, so then he does the following (this is very important):
- He created the rules of sin
- He knew that Adam and Eve would break the rules (that weren't known to be evil because of the tree, keep that in mind).
- He sends His son to earth to die for man's sin (that he created knowingly).
- So, He sent himself, to die to appease Himself for the "sins" that He created knowingly.
What the hell is wrong with that god? Self-centered, egotistical, and totally circular in logical terms. There are thousands of contradictions in the "infallible" bible, and not a shred of evidence to suggest a creator. Christians like to create a false dichotomy when talking about Evolution, but keep in mind, God created evil (Isaih 45:7, King James Version [they rewrite that out in the other ones like NIV and Living]).
Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what
I've written except you. To everyone else this is
just a blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool? I have
to give God His pen back now. He needs it to write
some more names in the Book of Life.
How freaking convenient. Either that or the person composing this story needs to be committed for being completely neurotic.
Insert a nice ending about how he doesn't hurt anymore and of course...
Signed with Love from God, Jesus & Me.
Oh, and don't forget the hook to get the christians to forward it on.
(Let's see Satan stop this one.) Take 60-seconds
and repost this, within the hour, you will have
caused a multitude of believers to pray to God for
each other. Then sit back and feel the Holy Spirit
work in your life for doing what you know God
loves "When you're down to nothing, God is up to
I thought pride was a sin.
REPOST THIS..titled "this is beautiful..try not to cry"
... or repost it as a critique. I hate chain mail, especially this type.
OK, there you have it. Here's a link to my MySpace. You can see the bulletin if you're my friend. This is a benefit for the rest of you, I hope. Feel free to critique my arguments, since it was written in a hurry, and perhaps I can do better against them in the future!