We all knew this was coming...

digitalbeachbum
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We all knew this was coming...

http://www.motherjones.com/print/188141

 

 

14 Wacky "Facts" Kids Will Learn in Louisiana's Voucher Schools

Slave masters were nice, the KKK is A-OK, and the Great Depression is a liberal fantasy. Thanks, Gov. Jindal!

Thanks to a new law [1] privatizing public education in Louisiana, Bible-based curriculum can now indoctrinate young, pliant minds with the good news of the Lord—all on the state taxpayers' dime.

Under Gov. Bobby Jindal's voucher program, considered the most sweeping [2] in the country, Louisiana is poised to spend tens of millions of dollars to help poor and middle-class students from the state'snotoriously terrible public schools [3] receive a private education. While the governor's plan sounds great in the glittery parlance [4] of the state's PR machine, the program is rife with accountability problems[5] that actually haven't been solved [6] by the new standards [7] the Louisiana Department of Education adopted two weeks ago.

For one, of the 119 (mostly Christian) participating schools, Zack Kopplin, a gutsy college sophomore who's taken to Change.org [8] to stonewall the program, has identified at least 19 [9] that teach or champion creationist nonscience and will rake in nearly $4 million in public funding [10] from the initial round of voucher designations.

Read about Bobby Jindal's exorcism problem [11].

Many of these schools, Kopplin notes, rely on Pensacola-based A Beka Book [12] curriculum or Bob Jones University Press [13] textbooks to teach their pupils Bible-based "facts," such as the existence of Nessie the Loch Ness Monster [14] and all sorts of pseudoscience that researcher Rachel Tabachnick and writer Thomas Vinciguerra have thankfully pored [15] over [16] so the rest of world doesn't have to.

Here are some of my favorite lessons:

1. Dinosaurs and humans probably hung out: "Bible-believing Christians cannot accept any evolutionary interpretation. Dinosaurs and humans were definitely on the earth at the same time and may have even lived side by side within the past few thousand years."Life Science [17], 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2007

 YouTubeMuch like tough cop Katie Coltrane and Teddy the T-rex in the direct-to-video hit Theodore Rex [18] Screenshot: YouTube

2. Dragons were totally real: "[Is] it possible that a fire-breathing animal really existed? Today some scientists are saying yes. They have found large chambers in certain dinosaur skulls…The large skull chambers could have contained special chemical-producing glands. When the animal forced the chemicals out of its mouth or nose, these substances may have combined and produced fire and smoke."Life Science [17], 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2007

3"God used the Trail of Tears to bring many Indians to Christ."—America: Land That I Love [19], Teacher ed., A Beka Book, 1994

4. Africa needs religion: "Africa is a continent with many needs. It is still in need of the gospel…Only about ten percent of Africans can read and write. In some areas the mission schools have been shut down by Communists who have taken over the government."—Old World History and Geography in Christian Perspective [20], 3rd ed., A Beka Book, 2004

The literacy rate in Africa is "only about 10 percent"--give or take a few dozen percentage points. residentevil_stars2001/FlickrThe literacy rate in Africa is "only about 10 percent"…give or take a few dozen percentage points [21]. residentevil_stars2001 [22]/Flickr

5. Slave masters were nice guys: "A few slave holders were undeniably cruel. Examples of slaves beaten to death were not common, neither were they unknown. The majority of slave holders treated their slaves well."United States History for Christian Schools [23], 2nd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 1991

 BFF 4lyfe!  Edward Williams Clay/Library of CongressDoesn't everyone look happy?! Edward Williams Clay/Library of Congress

6. The KKK was A-OK: "[The Ku Klux] Klan in some areas of the country tried to be a means of reform, fighting the decline in morality and using the symbol of the cross. Klan targets were bootleggers, wife-beaters, and immoral movies. In some communities it achieved a certain respectability as it worked with politicians."United States History for Christian Schools [24], 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2001

Just your friendly neighborhood Imperial Wizard! Unknown/Library of CongressJust your friendly neighborhood Imperial Wizard Unknown/Library of Congress

7. The Great Depression wasn't as bad as the liberals made it sound: "Perhaps the best known work of propaganda to come from the Depression was John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath…Other forms of propaganda included rumors of mortgage foreclosures, mass evictions, and hunger riots and exaggerated statistics representing the number of unemployed and homeless people in America."United States History: Heritage of Freedom [25], 2nd ed., A Beka Book, 1996

Definitely Photoshopped.  U.S. National Archives and Records Administration/WikipediaDefinitely Photoshopped. U.S. National Archives and Records Administration/Wikipedia

8. SCOTUS enslaved fetuses: "Ignoring 3,500 years of Judeo-Christian civilization, religion, morality, and law, the Burger Court held that an unborn child was not a living person but rather the "property" of the mother (much like slaves were considered property in the 1857 case of Dred Scott v. Sandford)."American Government in Christian Perspective [26], 2nd ed., A Beka Book, 1997

9. The Red Scare isn't over yet: "It is no wonder that Satan hates the family and has hurled his venom against it in the form of Communism."— American Government in Christian Perspective [26], 2nd ed., A Beka Book, 1997

Meanwhile, God sneezes glitter snot in the form of Capitalism. Catechetical Guild/WikipediaCatechetical Guild/Wikipedia

10. Mark Twain and Emily Dickinson were a couple of hacks: "[Mark] Twain's outlook was both self-centered and ultimately hopeless…Twain's skepticism was clearly not the honest questioning of a seeker of truth but the deliberate defiance of a confessed rebel."Elements of Literature for Christian Schools [27], Bob Jones University, 2001

"Several of [Emily Dickinson's] poems show a presumptuous attitude concerning her eternal destiny and a veiled disrespect for authority in general. Throughout her life she viewed salvation as a gamble, not a certainty. Although she did view the Bible as a source of poetic inspiration, she never accepted it as an inerrant guide to life."Elements of Literature for Christian Schools [27], Bob Jones University, 2001

And her grammar was just despicable! Ugh! Todd-Bingham picture collection, 1837-1966 (inclusive)/ Manuscripts & Archives, Yale UniversityTo say nothing of her poetry's Syntax and Punctuation—how odious it is.Todd-Bingham picture collection, 1837-1966 (inclusive)/ Manuscripts & Archives, Yale University

11. Abstract algebra is too dang complicated: "Unlike the 'modern math' theorists, who believe that mathematics is a creation of man and thus arbitrary and relative, A Beka Book teaches that the laws of mathematics are a creation of God and thus absolute…A Beka Book provides attractive, legible, and workable traditional mathematics texts that are not burdened with modern theories such as set theory."—ABeka.com [28]

 MittRomney.comMATHS: Y U SO HARD? Screenshot: MittRomney.com [29]

12Gay people "have no more claims to special rights than child molesters or rapists."Teacher's Resource Guide to Current Events for Christian Schools, 1998-1999, Bob Jones University Press, 1998

13. "Global environmentalists have said and written enough to leave no doubt that their goal is to destroy the prosperous economies of the world's richest nations."Economics: Work and Prosperity in Christian Perspective [30], 2nd ed., A Beka Book, 1999

Plotting world destruction, BRB.  Lynn Freeny, Department of Energy/FlickrPlotting economic apocalypse, BRB Lynn Freeny, Department of Energy [31]/Flickr

14. Globalization is a precursor to rapture: "But instead of this world unification ushering in an age of prosperity and peace, as most globalists believe it will, it will be a time of unimaginable human suffering as recorded in God's Word. The Anti-christ will tightly regulate who may buy and sell."Economics: Work and Prosperity in Christian Perspective [30], 2nd ed., A Beka Book, 1999

He'll probably be in cahoots with the global environmentalists. Luca Signorelli/WikipediaSwapping insider-trading secrets is the devil's favorite pastime. Luca Signorelli/WikipediaWhew! Seems extreme. But perhaps we shouldn't be too surprised. Gov. Jindal, you remember, once tried to perform an exorcism on a college gal pal. [11]

 

 

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harleysportster
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I do feel sorry

    I do feel really sorry for the those young children that are going to be indoctrinated into this type of insane nonsense. I feel no sympathy for the bastards that have pushed this and are creating false history and propaganda and call it "education". Too much of  a reminder of the Hitler youth for me.

“It is proof of a base and low mind for one to wish to think with the masses or majority, merely because the majority is the majority. Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people.”
― Giordano Bruno


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I am speechless. If this is

I am speechless. If this is accurate...

This is fucking outrage. How dare those dumbshits partake in this historical fucking revisionism and pseudoscience, and poison children's minds with it? If there are not teacher's strikes and protests to fight this, I will be so ashamed of Louisiana's education staff. If my state pulled this shit they would never hear the end of it. I can't fucking believe they are using the tax-payer's dime to fuck one of our state's youth.

I think Texas has also done some of this. Stupid FUCKING RELIGION cannot keep it's statistics high, so it's going to try to annihilate what secularism we had in schools? How can this not be a complete and utter violation of separation of church and state?  More lies and shit religious people spew.

Do Lousiana's parents know what vile ignorance that is going to be shoved down their children's throats? Or is this going to get repealed quickly?

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 And kids aren't learning

 And kids aren't learning this kind of bullshit anyway? Fundamentalist parents are going to teach their kids complete bullshit no matter what you do. At least now parents will have an option of where they want their kids educated and if the results in Louisiana follow the experiences from other voucher states there will be a lot of new private schools being built both religious and secular. Some will be terrible, some will be excellent and many somewhere in the middle. Ultimately, it is the parents responsibility to put the kids where they will receive the best education. Agreed, that many parents are absolutely terrible at parenting, but at least those parents who care about their kids and want their kids to get a great education now have options. More than could be said for being stuck in a public school regardless of its quality. 

 

@ThunderJones

I imagine these examples were probably all taken from one or two schools. Without evidence I am skeptical that it accurately reflects the majority of private schools. Look at the source, motherjones.com has a history of cherry picking to demonize their political opponents. And all of the books these were taken out of were "Bob Jones University Press" and "A Beka Book", not sure how many schools use that in their curriculum, but since motherjones doesn't give us a number my instincts lead me to believe it is extremely small, maybe even one. 

 

Edit: According to the links provided by the MotherJones article 19 schools teach creationism and 10 of them use the ABeka curriculum.  

I just usually go with my own taste. If I like something, and it happens to be against the law, well, then I might have a problem.- Hunter S. Thompson


digitalbeachbum
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If I understand you

If I understand you correctly, you are saying "at least they are getting an education"?????

Kids shouldn't be learning this bullshit anyway and it shouldn't be on the taxpayer to pay for the wrong information.

And no... kids usually aren't learning this bullshit.

As for MotherJones, yeah they are biased, but this story is the real deal. This is what the christian right wants. Indoctrination of kids in to their religious ranks by feeding them crap and turn their brains in to mush.

 

Beyond Saving wrote:

 And kids aren't learning this kind of bullshit anyway? Fundamentalist parents are going to teach their kids complete bullshit no matter what you do. At least now parents will have an option of where they want their kids educated and if the results in Louisiana follow the experiences from other voucher states there will be a lot of new private schools being built both religious and secular. Some will be terrible, some will be excellent and many somewhere in the middle. Ultimately, it is the parents responsibility to put the kids where they will receive the best education. Agreed, that many parents are absolutely terrible at parenting, but at least those parents who care about their kids and want their kids to get a great education now have options. More than could be said for being stuck in a public school regardless of its quality. 

 

@ThunderJones

I imagine these examples were probably all taken from one or two schools. Without evidence I am skeptical that it accurately reflects the majority of private schools. Look at the source, motherjones.com has a history of cherry picking to demonize their political opponents. And all of the books these were taken out of were "Bob Jones University Press" and "A Beka Book", not sure how many schools use that in their curriculum, but since motherjones doesn't give us a number my instincts lead me to believe it is extremely small, maybe even one. 

 

Edit: According to the links provided by the MotherJones article 19 schools teach creationism and 10 of them use the ABeka curriculum.  

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.

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digitalbeachbum wrote:If I

digitalbeachbum wrote:

If I understand you correctly, you are saying "at least they are getting an education"?????

Kids shouldn't be learning this bullshit anyway and it shouldn't be on the taxpayer to pay for the wrong information.

And no... kids usually aren't learning this bullshit.

As for MotherJones, yeah they are biased, but this story is the real deal. This is what the christian right wants. Indoctrination of kids in to their religious ranks by feeding them crap and turn their brains in to mush.

Well I don't think any public money should be going towards education, I think parents should stop being fucking cheapskates but that is another issue entirely. What I am saying is that MJ clearly cherry picked from the worst of the worst and are trying to use that as an argument to throw out the whole idea of vouchers. They ignore the hundreds of private schools that do a great job educating while focusing on the less than 20 that do a terrible job. Perhaps the 19 schools that teach this shit might be a good reason to modify the law to disqualify those schools, it is not a good reason to throw all of the kids back in public schools where we know 50% of them are terrible. (Got the 50% number from the MJ article)

I have not studied the Louisiana voucher program at all, but I am sure there are probably several areas it can be improved. The fact that it is not perfect, does not mean that it should be scrapped entirely. At the very least, it gives parents control over where their kids are educated, which I say is an improvement. Many parents will make bad choices, but I don't think it is government's job to stop parents from making bad choices.

I just usually go with my own taste. If I like something, and it happens to be against the law, well, then I might have a problem.- Hunter S. Thompson


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what really pisses me off is

what really pisses me off is the shit about the great depression.  my great-grandmother used to sift the chicken feed for bran and that was damn near all my grandfather had to eat as a child.  but i suppose that was all a figment of his overactive child's imagination...

well, he went on to help win the war against fascism and my father was a union man, so fuck you and your christian "values."

"I asked my father,
I said, 'Father change my name.'
The one I'm using now it's covered up
with fear and filth and cowardice and shame."
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I feel sorry for the kids

I feel sorry for the kids exposed to this, but realistically it's a good thing for everyone else. Year by year Louisiana's population will become dumber and less capable of self sufficiency, until the idiots can no longer support themselves and die off.

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