The Armory of God: A Rewriting of Ephesians 6

tastybrain
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The Armory of God: A Rewriting of Ephesians 6

Here is my atheist rendition/rewriting of Ephesians 6:10-17 which Christians consider so profound. You may want to read it in the King James Version to appreciate my word choice, since it's modeled after that translation.

 

Critical comments welcome. Thanks. It's not T.S. Eliot, but there you have it.

 

 

The Armory of God
after Ephesians 6:10-17



Finally, my brethren, be weak in your mind and in the power of your reasoning.

Put on the whole armour of god, that ye may be able to withstand the wiles of the enlightened.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the literati, against thinkers, against the doubters of the darkness of this world, against scientific theories in high regard.

Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of god, that ye may be able to remain ignorant in the face of progress, and having proved nothing, to know.

Stand therefore, having your loins wrapped in pudicity, and having on the chinstrap of self-righteousness.

And your feet fettered with the reparation of original sin.

And above all, brandishing the buckler of bigotry wherewith ye shall be able to deflect the darts of debate.

And take the visor of dogma and the foil of faith, which is the ward of god.


Jeffrick
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Hi tastybrain.

                                     Your version is certainly more accurate then crazy Pauls',  way to go guy.                                 I read the whole chapter for the hell of it and got surprised; Eph.6:2 "honer thy father and mother; which is the first commandment.."                    It's the fifth commandment,  clearly Paul of Tarsus didn't bother with the ground rules any better then modern christians.                               Eph.6:5  "slaves ,   be obidient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembeling, in singleness of your heart..."                     Paul liked slavery has much as any other christian, "...according to the flesh..."  means if you are born a slave you stay a slave, born a master you get to stay rich and free. No thanks Paul.                               Eph.6:12  "For we wrestle NOT against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers..."  .                          This is the HYPOCRITE Paul directly violating the word of Jesus "Render unto Caeser that which is Caesers, render unto God....etc." Paul was the first cafateria christian.    What a jackass.   

 

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Brian37
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Me thinkist thou art a doo

Me thinkist thou art a doo doo head. That and I am jealous of the prose of thee.(note to self: Did Me thinkist this, or typith this?)

Somewhere on Infidelguy's "Entertainment and media" section maybe the second or 3rd page of that section I too a stab at rewriting "Macbeth act 5 scene 5", and made it about all god claims. The poem is called "Out out Brief Candle"

Good stuff here bud. Kudos.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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