Help me out here AND RRS....

Brian37
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Help me out here AND RRS....

My boss has given me permission to ask your advice in coming up with a marquee add for our sign for Easter. I KNOW I KNOW. But what he and I came up with is lame.

I am already donating a portion of my next check 20 bucks  to RRS. I will add 10 bucks more to what I had in my mind which will be donated on behalf of the winning submission. TO RRS, not him.

It does not have to be religious. It can be campy, or silly.

Just a reminder, this marquee is for a food joint. BUT it is limited to two lines and the letters each are 6 inches tall and the space is about 8 feet wide.

So whatever you submit should be short and sweet.

It is an asap thing, so whomever strikes me the best quickest will have another 10 bucks added to what I already will donate.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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 What type of food is it?

 What type of food is it?  Pizza?  What did you come up with?

- Brian Sapient


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This is a family

This is a family restaurant.  If you are looking for beer and strippers, that is the other place across town.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

This is a family restaurant.  If you are looking for beer and strippers, that is the other place across town.

Where at, exactly?

- Brian Sapient


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Well, we have three

Well, we have three locally.  I would suggest that you avoid Harry O's though.  The strippers are all skanks there.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

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It is a breakfast place.  

It is a breakfast place.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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Sapient wrote: What type of

Sapient wrote:

 What type of food is it?  Pizza?  What did you come up with?

I am not not going into to much detail because there are people who could if they wanted exploit my actual real location. IF you don't want me to do that here, you can delete this post.

I was just trying to have some fun and throw you some donations. I will still donate the 30 bucks which was originally 20 until I came up with this. I am just going to name the winner of the 10 bucks in honor of coming up with it.

It is a breakfast place on the south east coast. That is all I am willing to say.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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Well.......

 

 

 

                 .....if it's a breakfest place.   (IHOP?)    Why not....."The rabbits not the only one with eggs for Easter" ,   "Unlike the bunny  we don't hide our eggs"  "The Easter bunny has eggs, we have everything else"  ,   "Real eggs!! Not Bunny beans!!"

"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."

VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"

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"Skip the bread at Church,

"Skip the bread at Church, come eat breakfast with us"

"Jesus died for your sins, have some bacon"

"Today in history: Jesus was killed, and we make the greatest fu**ing breakfast sandwich anywhere"

 

Any of them any good?

- Brian Sapient


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 Can I move this thread to

 Can I move this thread to somewhere other than kill em with kindness now?  I wanted to curse there, but I'm not allowed.

- Brian Sapient


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Sapient wrote:"Skip the

Sapient wrote:

"Skip the bread at Church, come eat breakfast with us"

"Jesus died for your sins, have some bacon"

"Today in history: Jesus was killed, and we make the greatest fu**ing breakfast sandwich anywhere"

 

Any of them any good?

I wouldn't hesitate but I also wouldn't have a job. LOL

I used to work at a pizza place  where one guy put on the sign, "Now hiring muff divers" AND THE IRONY is that he didn't get fired. His boss yelled at him but thought it was funny . The sign was supposed  read "Now hiring drivers"

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


Brian37
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Sapient wrote: Can I move

Sapient wrote:

 Can I move this thread to somewhere other than kill em with kindness now?  I wanted to curse there, but I'm not allowed.

You own the website. Curse all you want.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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A giant easter bunny pooping

A giant easter bunny pooping out eggs and the caption

 

"scramble eggs made especially for you"


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Moved to "The

Moved to "The Arts".

 

Honestly, I was surprised after I posted to find it was KEWK.  I sort of pushed the limit myself.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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 OT here, but to Brain37,

 OT here, but to Brain37, is your phone working?

Favorite oxymorons: Gospel Truth, Rational Supernaturalist, Business Ethics, Christian Morality

"Theology is now little more than a branch of human ignorance. Indeed, it is ignorance with wings." - Sam Harris

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Answers in Gene Simmons

Answers in Gene Simmons wrote:

Moved to "The Arts".

 

Honestly, I was surprised after I posted to find it was KEWK.  I sort of pushed the limit myself.

I know but even Jean submitted a winner I would accept it. This is all in fun.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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 OK, this will not fit on

 

OK, this will not fit on the sign but I have a mental image going here.

 

Boris Badanov is Natasha's pimp. Natasha says: “OK I will do the chick but not the bunny. He hides his eggs in strange places.”

 

That is actually a ripoff from Stern. back when he had to do real work, one time, he was live from some radio convention where June Foray was a guest. He had to write a bit instantly to fit the deal and he got her to say “I do moose but not squirrel. Squirrel hide nuts in strange places”.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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BobSpence1 wrote: OT here,

BobSpence1 wrote:

 OT here, but to Brain37, is your phone working?

Yes it is working, but I also have caller ID. OUCH and, of course I am the wimp you know I am.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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BobSpence1 wrote: OT here,

BobSpence1 wrote:

 OT here, but to Brain37, is your phone working?

Yes it is working, but I also have caller ID. OUCH and, of course I am the wimp you know I am.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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Brian37 wrote:BobSpence1

Brian37 wrote:

BobSpence1 wrote:

 OT here, but to Brain37, is your phone working?

Yes it is working, but I also have caller ID. OUCH and, of course I am the wimp you know I am.

So that's why I just get busy tone??

 

Favorite oxymorons: Gospel Truth, Rational Supernaturalist, Business Ethics, Christian Morality

"Theology is now little more than a branch of human ignorance. Indeed, it is ignorance with wings." - Sam Harris

The path to Truth lies via careful study of reality, not the dreams of our fallible minds - me

From the sublime to the ridiculous: Science -> Philosophy -> Theology


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back to the OP

"No stale peeps here."

Don't know how classy your joint is but do a chocolate heavy breakfast buffet - chocolate fountain, chocolate bunnies and eggs, warm chocolate syrup for waffles and pancakes, chocolate fondue, etc.

"Gave up chocolate for Lent?  Come sin with us!"

"Get your chocolate bunny fix here"

"Chocolate has antioxidants - its good for you!"

"Got PMS? Mellow out with our chocolate buffet"

"The Easter Bunny stopped by and he had the runs!"

Well, maybe not the last one.

 

-- I feel so much better since I stopped trying to believe.

"We are entitled to our own opinions. We're not entitled to our own facts"- Al Franken

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"Rabbits don't really have

"Rabbits don't really have eggs but we do and the way you like them."


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You don't have to hunt

 

You don't have to hunt around for great deals this easter! 

Hop on by for great food at great prices!

 

The best eggs this easter are easy to find!

Sometimes the greatest treats are hidden in plain sight!

 

 


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eat breakfast here or we

eat breakfast here or we will kill your entire family


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Cpt_pineapple wrote:eat

Cpt_pineapple wrote:

eat breakfast here or we will kill your entire family

Very subtle, but strangely compelling.  I think I like it.


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These are all good for a

These are all good for a laugh, but keep in mind that the sign is restricted to letters and two lines.

The sign is about 8 ft wide with only two lines. The letters are about 6 inches tall and about an inch and a half wide.. Simply put the message has to be short.

I love the Borris joke, I am going to tell that at work today.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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You will have to let us know

You will have to let us know how the joke goes over.

 

On a more real note, you could try handing out a free easter egg for every kid under ten.  It would cost your boss like a dime per kid but he gets all the sales for the whole family.

NoMoreCrazyPeople wrote:
Never ever did I say enything about free, I said "free."

=


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I hear this once...Good:

I heard this once...

Good: Finding Easter Eggs on Easter

Bad: Find Easter Eggs on Thanksgiving


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Cpt_pineapple wrote:eat

Cpt_pineapple wrote:

eat breakfast here or we will kill your entire family

Yea, nice, but we might have a huge PR problem.

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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No real stand outs yet. Keep

No real stand outs yet. Keep em coming.

FYI, I told my boss we couldn't have some of these submissions. I said it would be like a Cowboy fan writing an add for the Redskins.

I told them the borris Joke. It was a "meh" reaction. I guess it's not the same without the Russian voice to go with it.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37


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 Looking for Breakfast?

 Looking for Breakfast?  The best eggs this year aren't boiled or dyed.  


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RatDog wrote: Looking for

RatDog wrote:

 Looking for Breakfast?  The best eggs this year aren't boiled or dyed.  

Or, "The best eggs this year, you can eat here"

Or, "The best eggs this year, are scrambled or fried"

This is a submission. Keep em comming

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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This Easter why settle for

This Easter why settle for eggs when you can also have bacon, hash browns, and pancakes.  

 


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 Hey, you're eating my

 Hey, you're eating my eggs! (with a picture of a rabbit if you can do any graphics)

 

Lots of eggs...no paint.

 

If it was my restaurant I would serve rabbit leg and have the sign say "Legs & Eggs" of course, that would only appeal to a particular clientele. 

If, if a white man puts his arm around me voluntarily, that's brotherhood. But if you - if you hold a gun on him and make him embrace me and pretend to be friendly or brotherly toward me, then that's not brotherhood, that's hypocrisy.- Malcolm X


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The contest is over, and I

The contest is over, and I NAME EVERYONE HERE THE WINNER, well I simply donated the 20 from me and 10 on behalf of everyone here in this post. You are all winners.

30 bucks is headed Brian's way.

 

"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under BrianJames Rational Poet also on twitter under Brianrrs37