Is lust permitted in Christian marriage?
Posted on: March 31, 2009 - 6:43pm
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Is lust permitted in Christian marriage?
Do any of you know the contemporary Christian view of lust within marriage. It is my understanding that sexuality (even sexual thoughts) of any kind outside of marriage is considered sin among Christians. What about lust within marriage? Can a married couple show lust for each other? Can they have raw animal sexual intercourse? Can they have non-coital sex ie. hand jobs, blow jobs, cunnilingus, titty fuck, etc...? After menopause, can a married Christian woman have sex? Or are they only allowed to have missionary style procreative intercourse and only have thoughts of Jesus during the act? ie. no naughty thoughts like "I wanna fuck her and cum on her tits!!!!!!" or "I wanna sit on his face and spray my cunny juice!!!!"
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This is entirely dependent on the particular branch of Christianity.
I can only answer for the Christian group I grew up in, the Catholic church. Technically, any sexual act between a husband and wife which does not result in the "spilling of seed" is permissible. Essentially, as long as the man is not having an orgasm outside of the vagina(or from within a condom), those actions are permissible. It goes without saying that things like pornography are banned. Another consideration would be whether the sexual act objectifies the partners. This would likely preclude serious role playing like BSDM and practices which separate the actors from the action, like self filmed pornography. In recent years, it's become popular to point out that sex in marriage is a renewal of a sacrament, almost a human version of communion, which is the center of Catholic worship.
Granted, this is all "mainstream" Catholic thought, which a large portion of the church would consider borderline heretical. I have no doubt that most of the traditionalist movements would consider any non-coital sex to be illicit. Some of the "saints" of the Catholic church have taught far more restrictive ideas about sex. You'll see a lot of pretty grim teachings in many of the manuals on "spiritual warfare" which have waxed and waned in popularity for centuries.
Eastern Orthodox teachings are similar to Catholic teachings, with some measure of deviation about birth control and divorce. As they tend to accord a lot more authority to a group of early writers called the "Church Fathers" who had varying beliefs regarding sex, the issue seems to be more confused than the more rigid Catholic standards. As I was never Orthodox, however, I confess that I could be mistaken and be missing some more concrete teachings.
Protestant teachings are all over the map in terms of sex. I know of Protestant churches which allow gay marriage, and those who have a strict "sex just for procreation" line.
Pseudo-Christian groups like the Mormons are likewise hard to pin down.
If anyone else has something more to add from other ex-Christian perspectives, I would love to read it.
All that is necessary for the triumph of good is that evil men do nothing.
The conservatives one tell people you can't masturbate or have thoughts that would lead to an erection. So, somehow a Christian can go years before marriage without an erection or ejaculation, then on your wedding night, the equipment will miraculously start to function for the first time.
Taxation is the price we pay for failing to build a civilized society. The higher the tax level, the greater the failure. A centrally planned totalitarian state represents a complete defeat for the civilized world, while a totally voluntary society represents its ultimate success. --Mark Skousen
.......spilling of seed?....
Wow, who sits down and makes these rules? What I do in the bedroom is nobody's business but mine, thanks very much. I'm not sitting in a board-room type meeting all, "Well, on today's agenda let us discuss using handcuffs. What size do you deem permissible? Is there a material you feel more Godly than others?
*Our world is far more complex than the rigid structure we want to assign to it, and we will probably never fully understand it.*
"Those believers who are sophisticated enough to understand the paradox have found exciting ways to bend logic into pretzel shapes in order to defend the indefensible." - Hamby
If I am not mistaken, this particular terminology has it's roots in the story of Onan in Genesis.
This has been alternatively read as a condemnation of both birth control and masturbation. Most of the various councils, church fathers and papal encyclicals utilized it to condemn birth control. For some writers, birth control was considered an greater evil than murder. I know that Martin Luther and John Calvin both referenced it as evil, with Luther considering it a form of sodomy. Using it to condemn masturbation seems to have dropped off in recent decades.
The principal was then taken further by the Catholic church to mean that anything that separated the unitive element of sex from the procreative element was evil. Porn, BSDM and such would thus be considered to obstruct the unitive component, while forms of birth control would obviously block the procreative component.
Some Evangelical groups have recently taken up this same logic, and moved to condemn birth control.
And to answer your question, the people who sit down and make these rules are various groupings of Catholic bishops(primarily church councils like Vatican II), with the pope presiding and having the right to also overrule and make unilateral rulings on the matter. These rulings are usually released as papal encyclicals.
Since I haven't yet earned an "atheist" badge, dear peppermint, please don't mistake my knowledge for belief. I find it as bizarre as you do.
All that is necessary for the triumph of good is that evil men do nothing.
I didn't think you were a theist, actually.
Sooo...people that know nothing about sex make the rules about sex. Naturally.
*Our world is far more complex than the rigid structure we want to assign to it, and we will probably never fully understand it.*
"Those believers who are sophisticated enough to understand the paradox have found exciting ways to bend logic into pretzel shapes in order to defend the indefensible." - Hamby
Lust is hot.
Have you ever seen someone looking lustful? Mmmphhh.....
Haven't you heard? Sex is dirty. They only do it to make babies. Lot's and lots of babies...
After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
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www.RichWoodsBlog.com
I've never gotten either Gay Christians, Swinger Christians, or for that matter... women who talk in church... but that's another story.
Atheism isn't a lot like religion at all. Unless by "religion" you mean "not religion". --Ciarin
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Books about atheism
Sex is evil.
Begatting...now that's okay.