A Long Time Ago, In a Galaxy Far, Far Away... (For Jesus Christ Histrocity Advocates)
Star Wars is a historical narrative. I'm absolutely certain of it. It's just that it happened a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.
Look at the evidence! The characters were just way too creative and orginal to be made-up! I mean... 'Yoda'? 'Luke Skywalker'? Who could just come-up with names like that? Plus, I mean, look at the films! Lucas filmed them in an almost documentary-esque story!
Besides, we know the universe is big, and galaxies really are very distant from each other. And we also know it's really old. So there!
What evidence do you have that the events of Star Wars did not happen a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away? Yeah. That's what I thought.
"Natasha has just come up to the window from the courtyard and opened it wider so that the air may enter more freely into my room. I can see the bright green strip of grass beneath the wall, and the clear blue sky above the wall, and sunlight everywhere. Life is beautiful. Let the future generations cleanse it of all evil, oppression and violence, and enjoy it to the full."
- Leon Trotsky, Last Will & Testament
February 27, 1940