Ray Comfort isn't smart
Offline Atheists Evolved From Chickens
A loving Christian brother just emailed me and said, “Man-o-man. There are some bitter, furious, Christian hatin' bloggers out there!!!” I told him that he is seeing comparatively nice ones. I delete the bad blogs. He’s right though. Some of the atheists that are part of this blog are pretty nasty. So, I have decided to return a bit of the fire (in love, of course).
My new theory is that perhaps atheists evolved from the chicken, because they not only have chicken characteristics--a head, eyes, mouth, skin, neck, heart, earlobes and legs (homology structures), but they also have the chicken’s tendencies--they are chicken livered. They hang around Christians like annoying little bugs hang around light, trying to inject their poison whenever they can.
If you are an atheist, I hope I’m ruffling your feathers. I want to get under your skin and ask why you don’t have the courage to even whisper to Moslems what you keep shouting at Christians. Prove me wrong. Get onto a Moslem website and tell them that you don’t believe their god exists. Do your little “I don’t believe in Zeus” thing. Tell them they believe a myth. Talk about Mohammed as you do Jesus (use lower case for Mohamed). Do your “I don’t believe in the flying spaghetti monster” thing. Tell them that we weren’t made by a god (lower case), but that they evolved from primates (that will go down well). Also, let them know in no uncertain terms that the Koran is full of mistakes (give some examples), and that their mosques are full of hypocrites.
You wouldn’t dare, because you are chicken-livered. You know that they are not like Christians. Despite the “anonymity” of your little chicken coop, they would come after you to lop off your head. And when they find you, you would fall on your knees and be praying to God for help, quicker than I can move a fly swat . . . and I'm pretty quick. So, think about what you are doing, and think about how much you value your life. Then think about what we are telling you. Think.
Distributed by www.ChristianWorldviewNetwork.com
By Ray Comfort
Brian and Kelly debating this dude is comparable to Hulk Hogan wailing on a retarded midget.
Wish in one hand, shit in the other, see which one fills up first.
If you carefully read what Banana Boy writes, and gauge his reactions to the comments, I think it becomes clear that Ray is actually an atheist in denial. I think the inevitable conclusions scare him shitless, so he does everything he can to hang on to a dogma he has no real faith in.
I almost pity the fellow.
Almost.
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me." --Emo Philips
Comfort "So, think about what you are doing, and think about how much you value your life. Then think about what we are telling you. Think."
Fear of Muslims+Yahweh=Christianity Conversion...now I get it.
“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” Yoda
So he starts by saying atheists are so hateful, then say he wants us to all be put in a position where we have o cry out to god to save our lives or die.
Wut
EDIT-I'm pretty sure chickens and every other bird doesn't have earlobes. How bad at biology can someone be..
Loc'n'Load
Psalm 14:1 "the fool hath said in his heart there is a God"-From a 1763 misprinted edition of the bible
"Don't stand beside my grave and cry,
I am not there. I did not die."
What a doofus, I know plenty of people who debate moslems on their faith, this is not something to be scared of they're human beings like anyone else, some get militant, some don't, some are freakin mad, some are really great people - and you guys, of course, know this..... so this is redundant.. and saying most moslems don't speak english is also redundant isn't it?... yeah.. OK.. and... yeah Ray Comfort is not smart....
-- wearing a blue shirt and pouting must be a closet atheist.
Theist badge qualifier : Gnostic/Philosophical Panentheist
"Have you ever seen bugs trapped in amber?
Well, here we are, Mr. Pilgrim, trapped in the amber of this moment. There is no why." Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
Ooh! Ooh! The "state something obvious game! I want to play!
Lessee. "Ray Comfort isn't smart". Hmm.
2+2=4.
"The whole conception of God is a conception derived from ancient Oriental despotisms. It is a conception quite unworthy of free men."
--Bertrand Russell
You know you're in a cult when your profession becomes your day job.
If only chickens were poisonous. The world would be a much more interesting place.
And I want a genetically-engineered kangaroo / velocipraptor. It can have some chicken genes, too, as long as it gets the poison.
Seriously, that was like eating a metaphor salad.
Not really. You're just confusing the shit out of me.
Besides, we already know that we didn't evolve from chickens. We haven't been closely related to chickens since like the Permian. Chickens are descendents of the diapsid lineage, while mammals are descended from the synapsid line. Someone correct me if I'm wrong?
I don't understand what the point of the rant is. Is it that Christians are better than muslims? Or that fundamentalist christians are less likely to kill you for questioning their beliefs than fundamentalist muslims? Or that all atheists are cowards because they don't want to have their heads lopped off? Or that all atheists are really theists deep down in their hearts, and Ray knows this(how?)? Or is it all those points at once? Because none of them are valid points, even if they were 100% true, which they are not. The dude's an intellectual lightweight, I hope he falls over and grazes his knee.
Wish in one hand, shit in the other, see which one fills up first.
Is that a slap on the wrist? I had to think of a subject title, it was the first one that popped into my head. geez. gee wizz.
Wish in one hand, shit in the other, see which one fills up first.
Man, you turn me on when you talk like that.
Science. It works, bitches.
"I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day."
Douglas Adams
I just checked my Ray Comfort to English dictionary and "ruffling your feathers" does in fact mean, "laughing profusely."
"I'm a sap, I'm too nice a guy. I'm giving Bob what I consider to be some real nice access to my channels. I put him on for an hour, and what happens when you're a nice guy, you get stepped on. I'm a little too loose with people criticizing me because it's interesting." - Howard Stern
When I do get into a debate with Muslims, I don't bother capitalizing muhammad or god. Actually, the last topic I was arguing about was someone said to post your favorite story about muhammad and I said that my favorite was when he married a little girl, age ~10. They got pretty pissed. Apparently it's ok to marry little girls if you are a prophet and lived a long time ago.
So I'm not really scared to call Muslims out in the same way that I do Christians. Do I get a prize, Ray? Perhaps a Croc-a-duck stuffed animal? I'd gladly accept one.
http://www.myspace.com/creucent
Oh shit, sorry. I had no intention of that. Just taking an opportunity to rag on Ray. It's an excellent post and I apologize for trivializing it with my weak ass joke.
"The whole conception of God is a conception derived from ancient Oriental despotisms. It is a conception quite unworthy of free men."
--Bertrand Russell
You know you're in a cult when your profession becomes your day job.
Ray really needs to spend more time peeling bananas and less time trying to write things that other people can read.
He'd be a far more productive person that way.
Henchman of reason, intellect, logics, and facts
aka, 'Plant Boy'
I, for one, welcome our new venomous, delicious kangaraptor overlords.
--
maybe if this sig is witty, someone will love me.
I may be completely wrong here. But let me know, ok?
I thought he married her at six and had sex with her at nine?
I heard someone mention that years ago, so I may be wrong. If anyone could fill me in, thanks. 'Cause I don't feel like digging through moronic religious text in the quran right now.
Science. It works, bitches.
"I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day."
Douglas Adams
technically, we were never related to chickens since the primate branch as well as the bird branch are so far removed from the initial population separation, of our common ancestor, event that the common ancestor that would relate us is neither bird nor mammal. Furthermore, the way you phrased it, you are implying that there were both birds and humans in the Permian . . . . . . . . . . . . oh yeah . . . .. and Ray is dumb and all that jazz or what . . . . actually, if atheists are chickens, Ray is a PUSSYcat.
" Why does God always got such wacky shit to say? . . . When was the last time you heard somebody say 'look God told me to get a muffin and a cup tea and cool out man'?" - Dov Davidoff
you know, i recall reading as a kid in one of my CHILDREN'S (ahem, Ray) science books (one of those nifty "fun things you didn't know" type books that i wish could be produced as quickly as fucked up children's fundamentalist indoctrination books...goddamn quality control...) that the whole fear/chicken analogy is flawed because chickens actually show a lot of pluck and aggression.
oh, and i love fried chicken livers. it's an eastern kentucky thing. ray was making me hungry.
but in my opinion, ray is a fucking GENIUS. he invents new kinds of shit for people who are already so full of shit that they're jaded and oversaturated.
there's just one thing baby
that comes from above
when push comes to shove
thank god for self love
--mose allison
btw, this argument among christians of "oh, you atheists are actually pussies because you'll never fuck with a muslim" is getting really old. it only serves to show that THEY'RE actually pussies because they have this idea that all muslims are testicle-eating monsters (and ovaries as well, ladies, but in all fairness that's a lot more work for them). that shows they know very few muslims or atheists.
never mind that ray conveniently forgets to mention that he's writing in the context of a western, cultarally christian society where the christians tend to be A LOT more obnoxious than the muslims. i wonder how many turkish or albanian atheists ray knows. i'm guessing none.
there's just one thing baby
that comes from above
when push comes to shove
thank god for self love
--mose allison
Eloise, since ray is a new zealander, i've often wondered, is he known at all down under? if so, what's the general opinion of him? did he come to the states because because more people would buy his bullshit there?
there's just one thing baby
that comes from above
when push comes to shove
thank god for self love
--mose allison
Chicken livers and gizzards are pupular in the more heavily PA-dutch areas of Pennsylvania, too (fried in a sort of breading.)
The trouble with born again Christians is they're even more annoying the second time around.
i'm not big on the gizzard. it's too tough. i do enjoy the heart though. as my father always says, you can buy a pack of chicken legs or breasts or whatever and fry them the exact same way, but for some reason they never taste as good as frying a whole chicken with the giblets at the same time.
btw, take a good look at my current profile pic. ever notice how ho chi minh looks a lot like colonel sanders?
there's just one thing baby
that comes from above
when push comes to shove
thank god for self love
--mose allison
Yeah, hearts are used, too. Wow - is Ray Comfort rea;lly that deluded and stupid that he thinks chickens are venomous or was that just a badly worded sentence?
The trouble with born again Christians is they're even more annoying the second time around.
well, what's worse is what's behind the words. this shows just how devetloped ray's social skills are, because it's basically a pompous, smug way of saying the kind of stuff we used to say to each other in high school. something like this:
"you chickenshit fucker! you talk a lotta shit now but you won't fuckin' say it to someone bigger 'n you, cuz he'd fuckin' kick your ass! go on, faggot, fuck with him! ahh, you pussy-ass piece-a-shit!"
isn't this what ray is essentially saying (in love of course)?
there's just one thing baby
that comes from above
when push comes to shove
thank god for self love
--mose allison
Yeah, I think that's his point. "you atheists might think you're smart, but you're all scaredy cats. See that swimming pool? It's swarming with fanatical muslims who'll rip your face off at the mere wiff of an atheist's fart. I bet if you went near it, they'd jump out and eat your brains for brunch, and not say sorry. My point being, you really believe in God deep down, I know you do, because I'm an asshole."
I'm a New Zealander, but he's not a new zealand celebrity. The New Zealander famous for being a dumbass fundy is someone none of you would have heard of, no-one knows who Ray Comfort is here.
Wish in one hand, shit in the other, see which one fills up first.
Damn few people know who he is here in America. I bet that there are more atheist americans that know who he is than christian americans.
Science. It works, bitches.
"I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day."
Douglas Adams
Another problem for the genious of Comfort to comprehend, is that his focus is so narrowed to J.C. and I.D. that any rationalist with a comment for allah and the short comings of mohammad and islam is not going to bother Ray Comfort about it; we take mohammad to the mountain of islam, and then bitch.
jeffrick
Comfort is smart in a primitive Bill Gates-esque self-preservation-to-the-detriment-of-society kind of way. I don't think what he believes is of any consequence to him; he could just as easily be selling Darwin car emblems and Dawkins DVDs to an atheist/agnostic majority. The issue is his vicious, beady-eyed ambition and complete lack of integrity.
"We don't have to justify the things that don't make any sense anymore."
~former Scientologist Greg Barnes
xenutv.com
No, he's got no name here at all to speak of.
Hate to say it but, possibly yes. He's almost totally ignored here, except maybe for the banana video on youtube, that was too funny to miss.
-- wearing a blue shirt and pouting must be a closet atheist.
Theist badge qualifier : Gnostic/Philosophical Panentheist
"Have you ever seen bugs trapped in amber?
Well, here we are, Mr. Pilgrim, trapped in the amber of this moment. There is no why." Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
The silliest thing about this is he doesn't seem to realise it can be turned straight around.Why are christians so scared? They stay in their safe countries, debating atheists who have proper debates and don't threaten them. Instead of using the same old tired arguments against atheists, why don't they go save the heathen muslin masses. If they really cared about saving people,they would risk death by going to muslim countries. The truth is deep down they aren't sure if the whole martyrdom thing is worth it.It's safer to insult atheists.
Loc'n'Load
Psalm 14:1 "the fool hath said in his heart there is a God"-From a 1763 misprinted edition of the bible
"Don't stand beside my grave and cry,
I am not there. I did not die."