Are you happy? [Trollville]
Offline Ahoy-hoy. Right, I'm Matt, and I am currently undertaking a project/experiment thing concerning happiness. Essentially, for the next 100 days, anything that would make you genuinely happy, I will do. Any suggestions you have, be they serious or spectacular or ridiculous or weird or embarrassing or mental; anything that will make you happy, I will do. It'd make you happy if I spelt out your name in cereal in Trafalgar Square? No worries mate, I'm on it. You want to know what actually happens if you eat Mentos then drink Coke? Fine, if it'll make you happy, I'll do so in a jiffy. You'd be happy if you want to meet up in Starbucks, or you want me to go a day solely eating bacon, or you'd like to see me stuff my shirt with garbage and roll in some raccoons? Then yes, yes, yes; say I, I will do ANYTHING! So how d'you send me your suggestion? Couldn't be easier - simply drop me a mail at [email protected] . I mean, why not? You're sitting there at your computer now, with the power to make me do whatever you want in the name of happiness at your fingertips. In just a click of a button you could be made genuinely happy! It's worth noting I can only do suggestions given to me via e-mail, so there's not much point just leaving your suggestions in the forum comments because ideas will probably go get lost, deleted, forgotten, etc. For my wee youtube video, check out - http://youtube.com/watch?v=fYapbkFTaP8 Go on. Live a little. I'm not a spammer - I'm just a regular joe intent on making strangers happy, and I open the gauntlet to all ideas far and wide... Think what act of whimsy or foolishness might cheer you up, let me know at [email protected] , and watch your crazed suggestion come to life! Cheers.
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What if some sadist finds this, and sends you an email asking you to do some weird, self-mutilating shit?
Then I'm screwed a bit, really - I try and comply with the demands of everyone so I guess I'd give it a shot. You're... you're not a sadist are you...? What would you like me to do? Hopefully something neither self-mutilating nor shit, perchance?
[email protected]
Well, I'm pretty happy without anyone else's help, so you won't likely be hearing from me. But say for example someone sent you an email saying that it would make them incredibly happy if you sawed off your little toe with a carving kinfe. Or they would be pleased as punch if you attempted to assassinate president Bush. Say a Vic Vega, or a Hannibal Lector, or a Ted Bundy finds you, and has some ideas of his own about happiness. What do you do then? Where exactly do you draw the line? And what if two people want you to do two different things, but those things contradict each other? For example, one man wants you to take a vow of chastity, and later this woman wants you to fly to San Francisco and have sex with a male prostitute?
Yeah I see what you're saying mate - it can all get a wee bit confusing sometimes. Fortunately as of yet I haven't had any mentalists of that sort asking me to set fire to my fingers or make out with a nailgun or something. I'll try my best to perform both of the happy suggestions which contradict eachother - if such is impossible I guess I'd choose the one which seems the most moral, or the one which makes the most people happy overall.
It's very much a 'cross that bridge when I come to it' sort of policy - I haven't got any specific rules for suggestions I definitely will and won't do, I just try my absolute hardest to comply with each one.
Are you sure you wouldn't like to mail me with a suggestion? You seem like a friendly enough person and I'd really appreciate some sort of idea...
[email protected]
Well guys, I sent a message in asking for money to pay my insane medical bills. Kept it short - no use depressing myself by writing a sob story. We'll see what happens.
However, I assume if someone told him to assasinate someone or something of that sort he could always say that would not make them 'truely' happy and give him/her a free therapy session instead.
I think Sapient should write in and tell him riding the world of theism would make him happy. Heck, it would make me happy too!
destroy mainstream religions,(let those in need of it believe whatever they wish,i dont care,i just dont want them to have ANY influence on my government or my way of life,which even as an atheist im more christian than most christians),and hook me up with a good woman,with plenty of differing opinions but open minded to mine willing to compromise,and either rich,or have me win the lottery so we can both have all we need to make it in this world,2 daughters and a son,oh,and either a really smart dog,or one so dumb he/she always amuses the family.
"Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions."--Frater Ravus