These days, I've been pretty out of it and my writer's block has really escalated lately. The only thing really keeping my sanity in check is music, it seems. I'm not smoking weed anymore due to personal reasons that I won't go into, but I think I'm beginning to feel the effects of not indulging. Not withdrawals or anything like that, but you notice a mind shift that happens after you stop and it becomes more and more gradual the more you discontinue use. I have so much stress and confusion swirling around in my head that I can barely see straight. In a nutshell, the future looks very uncertain for me right now and it terrifies me. Hey, most people don't have the courage to admit that.
I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I find the entire ritual behind getting all hyped up about a new year INCREDIBLY pretentious in every regard. Maybe it's because I'm getting older and the more I learn and absorb, the more I see how retarded these meaningless celebrations are and why they don't contribute to anything except waste and potential trouble. Every single New Year's Eve party I've ever been to has ended up with dumb asses puking all over the place, drunk morons, fights, horrendous music, ugly bitches hanging all over me and terrible drinks. Not only that, but the next day, you read about all the dip shits that died driving home drunk, the fools arrested at checkpoints, people getting shot by stray bullets from guns others fire up in the air or random acts of "celebration" which is just another way of saying "arson, rape, manslaughter or defacing property."
Now, most would just be saying "well, you're just sore about not being invited anywhere because you're a curmudgeon and no one likes you." I'm realistic first of all and second, I was invited to Las Vegas for New Year's this time around with a group of about seven people; some I know and some I barely know. I came very close to packing my bags, but ended up not going for a few reasons.
I was at Costco the other day and I was checking out the latest in new releases ranging from "Baby Momma: The Reason My Womb is Now Barren" and "Dictators: Dead and Loving It" when I came across a new book by Bill Maher. Imagine my surprise to see not only his first book in about six years, but a book that didn't reflect the backwoods region I currently reside in; ignorant, illiterate and pregnant.
There are a lot of articles I read, speeches I listen to, experts with motivational quotes that I examine that are designed to hit hard at reality and get us thinking and many scientific discoveries made every day that continue to make me delve deeper and deeper into my psyche. I try to expand every aspect of how I think and learn in any way that I can; well, sans harmful drugs, of course. For me, learning is one of the most important aspects of the human condition and those that come to this realization strive to make us all understand that.
Sometimes, however, there are some aspects of ourselves that may never be understood even through the most thoroughly organized data, tireless research and hair-pulling questions that we grapple with all the time. We can't possibly know everything; of course, theists would explain that that's when you plug a god into that gap and your worries are over. Every one here that disbelieves understands that when you cast aside your brain to a figment of man, you surrender your existence. Everything dealing with what people consider gods are centuries of limited understanding coming back to haunt us in a modern society, plain and simple. Men wrote every holy book on Earth due to observations around them and when they couldn't explain it, they invented supernatural characteristics to feed the need of knowing. What we have now is separation, confusion, disorder, violence and social disillusionment.
It just occured to me that I never made a third part to this and that's a shame because I have so many more fun-filled dredges to add to the last part of this line-up! So, let's rock this joint and, while we're at it, rock a joint if you catch my drift! *elbow nudges*
It's late, I had the best sex session with my woman (on her birthday) about twenty minutes ago and I feel AWESOME. What better time than now to lay out the next group of dimwitted, primordial shit stains of the populace of Earth?
Without further ado...
So, I've been thinking lately that there are a lot of rude, self-absorbed, scum sucking, amoeba-brain sized individuals on this Earth that just beg to be drop kicked into the nearest gorge and break every bone on the way down until they release their bowels after suffering excrutiating pain from the 500-ft. plummet before they finally expire.
Now then, I never believed in prayer when I was religious and I think people that do it now are contradicting themselves since God supposedly has a divine plan. It's a selfish act that begs the question as to why worshippers believe that intertwining their fingers while kneeling, lifting their hands up in church or bowing their heads with their eyes closed will envoke anything but futility.
That being said, here's a small list of certain types of people that, regardless of beliefs, need to pray because if I ever get the chance to do so, I will personally torture and/or humiliate them for being such a waste of food, manners, air and resources.
Let's get one thing straight. One fucking thing straight right fucking now. The disbelievers of God are not congruent with those that believe in God. It's incredibly simple to understand this.
Atheists do not have churchs/mosques/temples/etc. where believers go and bring friends and family to further strengthen religious bonds among everyone; the doubtful, the unsure, the frail or sickly in search of hope and those too young to fully grasp the gravity of the situation they're being exposed to. We have organizations that are usually privately funded and are, by and large, underground. Atheist "meetings," if you could call it that, usually consist of small talk about atheism on closed circuit radio (hardly ever TV unless it's a theist/atheist debate that gets recorded by some organization sponsoring it), speeches about books somewhat notorious atheists have written from research that they've compiled or seminars involving not just atheists, but theists as well so, we don't have our own exclusive club houses because we believe that the entire world is our fucking podium for free speech minus the rhetoric and that everyone can listen in.
My apologies in advance if what I'm talking about isn't as clear as you'd all like, but I'm a little groggy from having a very interestingly awesome night so, sorry if this entry might seem kind of rambled and jumbled. I wasn't sure what to write for my first blog, but then it occured to me that I had a good topic and I have my girlfriend to thank because it's been her constant bitching and complaints about her job that inspired me.
We all have jobs that we can't stand and jobs we can't help but be unfulfilled with. Sometimes, we're just forced to suck it up and take the first opportunity that arises. My girlfriend landed a decent job that paid a few bucks above minimum wage, but it was something I could never envision myself doing in a hundred years; caregiving for the mentally retarded. Yes, I said "retarded" and I don't give a fuck about that politically correct horseshit. So, you're all probably thinking "hey, what's so bad about that job? Yeah, it might be gross, but it's easy!" I'm getting to why this particular home that my significant other works in is such a crock.
See, I could name the organization where she works, but I won't for various reasons, but I guess the main reason is because she's involved in some legal disputes right now and it wouldn't look good for her. Let's just call them "GS" for short.